Page 35 of No Limits

I glance around at Wes and see he’s sitting with Chelsea.

“Where’s your present?”“I didn’t want one right now. Watching you open yours was plenty.”

“That’s not tradition.”

He shrugs and takes a sip of coffee, lowering the arm closest to me around my waist and pulling me further into his side. It’s nice, sitting here with our family, watching Chelsea play with her new handbag while Wes messes around with what looks like a new camera.

My fingers are constantly fiddling with my new necklace, sliding it up and down the chain. I’m just getting comfortable and letting myself relax into Lochlyn when the timer goes off in the kitchen.

With a quick kiss to the top of my head, he hops off the couch and goes to deal with breakfast.

Which is delicious, and filled with laughs while we eat and drink mimosas.

It’s all going great, until wedding planning comes up. That’s when everybody kind of freezes, including Wes, who surely knows about how much I’m doing alone and what happened at the food tasting. Whether he heard from Lochlyn or Chelsea, I don’t know, possibly both.

The guys still go play basketball or go to the gym roughly once a week when Lochlyn can make time, which is less and less like everything else. But they went in that time he was making an effort to be home more.

“So…how are things going for you guys?”

“Um.” Lochlyn looks down at his roll and picks it apart. With a look in his direction, I can see his furrowed brow and I know he’s uncomfortable. Probably because he doesn’t know how to answer the question.

“Things are going well.” Under the table, I take Lochlyn’s hand in mine and squeeze. An effort to show him it’s okay. “We’re right where we should be. Everything’s been selected, and the next steps are lined up. Moving right along.”

While I think this is the right thing to say, the right way to act, Lochlyn doesn’t lift his eyes. He doesn’t squeeze my hand back.

Instead, he pulls his from beneath my own and still won’t look at me.

Am I wrong on all fronts and Lochlyn just doesn’t want to marry me anymore?

Chapter 17

It’snotuntillaterthat night that Lochlyn approaches me about his behavior. And it’s taken everything in me not to fall apart all day. Every present I opened, complete with an expensive handbag and more jewelry. Every presentheopened, including the new earbuds he wanted for work.

I’m sitting on the edge of our bed, my hands clasped between my knees while he paces the room. I don’t know why I’m here except that he asked me to be, and I need to know what’s on his mind.

Finally, he stops and kneels in front of me, taking my hands in his. There’s a wide and wild look in his eyes and his hair is standing on end. He’s completely frazzled, and I have no idea how to help him except to be here and listen.

“Shay, you need to know that I love you more than anything. That will never change.”

Not trusting my voice, I nod. It feels like there’s a giantbutcoming, and I can’t stand the anticipation of what it might be. So much that my insides are trembling.

“And I want to marry you, so much. It’s not even a possibility that I don’t.”

“Then…what is it?” I risk talking and hear the waver in my voice.

The way his head drops to my lap, and he wraps his arms around my waist, I know he does too.

“It’s a lot, Shay. So much. Ihatemy job. I hate it. I know it seems like I like it, that I’m enjoying myself and having a blast with the bands. I’m not. And I haven’t wanted to share this with you because I don’t want to put the stress on you. But I know it’s starting to affect us, and I can’t stand that. I didn’t know how to answer the wedding question today because I’m not involved, and Ihatethat. I hate that I’m too busy to know what’s going on and unable to do these things with you. That was always the plan, the intention. To do it together. And it just feels like it’s all falling apart.” He squeezes tighter around my middle.

My hands twist into his hair, and I run my nails down his back. This broken man is lying in my lap as though things haven’t been strained between us because he needs me. Because just like he’s my comfort, I’m his.

But his words only go so far. I want to let the tension go. I want this to make everything okay because I finally have a reason and some understanding. Yet I can’t. It’s too hard, there’s too much water now.

Not to mention, he’s just noticing now? Things have been this hard for months, bordering on a year. How has it taken all of this time for him to be aware? Or is it only because he couldn’t answer the question.

“I’m sorry it was a hard day for you, that it’s been hard. I had no idea. I wish you would have shared it with me.” At least then I would have had more insight into his moods, into what was going on in his brain.

The times he comes home after partying, he seems happy, like he had fun. And I’m sure he did on some level because it’s a party, so why wouldn’t he enjoy himself?

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