Page 76 of Setting Limits

We don’t need the extra blankets, as the dorm is plenty warm, but it’s fun to snuggle and pretend it’s frigid. It allows me to think of what life might be like if he stays, if we go the long haul.

“Chelsea.”

“Hm.” I’m drifting off for a nap. It’s hard not to when it’s warm and cozy and I’m more relaxed than ever.

“I’m going to stay for grad school.” Suddenly I’m wide awake, and my heart is racing.

“You are?”

“Yes. I’ve thought about it, and it’s the best choice.”“I don’t want you staying just because of me.” Though I do want him to stay. I just couldn’t bear if I was the only reason.

“I’m staying forus,Chelsea. There’s a difference. And Cornell’s program is amazing. It’s why I applied in the first place. But it makes sense for me to stay. I want to. I can’t stand the thought of being far away from you.”

“That sounds a lot like staying for me, though.” Sure, the program might be great, but the reasons behind staying seem to revolve around me.

“It’s about both of us. Chelsea, you affect me so much. Your presence, your laugh, your love. Being away from that would be harder than I want to think about. The programs I’ve looked at, they’re all similar in what they offer, and I’d happily settle in New York afterward. I don’t need a new state or even a new town.”

“And you’re sure?”

“Very.”

I throw my arms around his shoulders and pull myself into him, squeezing tightly before bursting into tears. I hadn’t realized quite how on edge the prospect of him leaving had truly made me. The knowledge that I can let that stress go, allows me to relax and for the floodgates to open.

“Shh, it’s okay, sweetness. I wanted to bring it up because I know you’ve been worried even though you won’t talk about it. It’s actually how I know. That’s what you do, squirrel away things that hurt you, avoid them, bury them down. But I’m going to be here to be with you.” He rocks me in his arms, running a hand down my hair.

“I’m happy. I am. I was just worried.”

“I know.” The fact that he knows is also pretty astounding. I haven’t had to voice my concerns. He even noted my propensity to bury things deep instead of talking about them. Another thing I haven’t voiced that I do, but he noticed.

“Chelsea, part of the reason is that this, right here, this is everything. Days like today. And while we’d have them if I was gone, it’d be rushed. We wouldn’t get to enjoy it because of the Sunday Effect.”

“The what?”

“The Sunday Effect. Where you feel like everything is about to end, that the weekend is almost over, and you need to do everything you wanted before it ends. I don’t want that for us. Not if it’s avoidable.”

I know that feeling all too well, and I wonder if I maybe had it a little bit in the last few weeks since I had found out about Stanford. That there was an end in sight, because he may leave.

It must be why there’s a sudden lightness in my chest. An ease in my body that hasn’t existed in weeks, possibly months.

I was waiting for the other shoe to drop, for something to go terribly wrong. But right now, it seems as though it’s the opposite.

And it’s a nice feeling.

Chapter 39

WaitingforWeshasme incredibly impatient. His class hasn’t even ended yet, and I’m already in my lingerie, awaiting his arrival.Ifhis class ends on time, he should be here within ten minutes of being released.

That’s also if he doesn’t stop to chat on his way, which he’s been known to do.

My excitement had me changing way before I needed to. It’s one of the few Fridays that Wes and I get at the apartment. I’ve happily given most of the weekends to Shay and Loch. I like the hustle and bustle of the dorm and not having to cook, while they prefer the quiet, and Loch’s a wizard in the kitchen.

But every now and then, we switch. Wes and I come here while Shay and Loch hole up in the dorm for the weekend.

The clunk of the lock has me jumping off the bed, fluffing my hair, and running into the hallway.

“Hey, baby! You’re back early. I have a surprise for yo—” I quickly shut up, my mouth hanging open, when standing in the living room, I find Shay, and not Weston.

Her eyes widen as she quickly takes me in, wearing a matching hot pink push-up bra and thong, before she covers her eyes and turns away, her face almost the same color as my lingerie.

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