Page 66 of Setting Limits

“You know, summer, breaking you and Lochlyn up.”

She’s waving her hand at me before I've even finished talking. “We’re beyond that now, Chels. It wasmonthsago. And we’re all happy and in a good place.”

“I know. I was just thinking about when things changed and how Wes really started to take hold on me. It was the concert.”

Her eyes don’t widen as I expected. There’s no shock value of it being that long, especially since I was with Brendan until after Thanksgiving.

“You’re not surprised. Why are you not surprised?”

“You’re my best friend, Chels. I saw the way you reacted to him. Brendan never had a chance. I know you stayed together for a while after that, but let’s just say the shock value ran off really quickly when you guys walked into the apartment in December. Especially when I saw how you two look at each other.”

“And how is that, exactly?”

“The way Lochlyn and I look at one another.” I know exactly the look she’s referring to. I didn’t see it that way, didn’t see Wes and I that way. But he did make me happy. I’d feel lucky if we could be as happy as Lochlyn and Shay are together.

“We should go on a double date sometime soon. I think it’d be fun to actually go out somewhere together.” Shay’s hopefulness pours through her words, and I know she really thinks it would be incredibly fun. I’m kind of surprised we haven’t done it already.

“Yeah. That’d be great.” I think. I’m not really sure. Lochlyn is fine while we’re all at the apartment, but what if he’s different when we’re out? Are they going to fight over who pays? That’s a big thing for both of them, which seems weird to me. We should be thankful we can afford it and that we have money. It’s all our parents’ anyway, even Wes’s.

“Oh, good. I think it will be fun. We should do it soon, before classes get too crazy again.” She’s genuinely excited, and that makes me want to go all the more. I’m sure Lochlyn has already agreed, and I know Wes will go too.

It will help distract me from the cloud hanging over Wes and I, the one I still refuse to face. He’s filled out grad school applications, and I know Cornell was part of the list, but I have no idea where else he applied. I didn’t ask and refused to talk about it.

It’ll be my own fault when he leaves, but at least I won’t have months of despair, knowing it’s coming.

Chapter 33

WedecidethatItalianis a safe bet for a double date, which is good because most places offer personal pizzas. The fact that everybody laughs and nobody is surprised when that’s what I order, makes me feel more at ease than I have been about the prospect of this evening. Why I’m so tense, I can’t really say. These are the three people I’m closest with in the world.

Shay also orders her usual, chicken parmesan. I know it’s her favorite, and Lochlyn does too, as she told me he made it for her once.

While we wait for our food, Lochlyn leans back in his chair, his arm across the back of Shay’s chair, twirling a curl, and the other swirling red wine at the table.

We’re sitting in silence, nobody knowing what to say, which is weird since we’re friends and family.

“Okay, this is crazy. We’re close with each other. This isn’t like boyfriend meets girlfriend’s brother for the first time. What the hell is going on? And, Lochlyn, why the hell are you looking at me like you want to kill me? YouknowI’m dating Chelsea. You okayed it.” Wes trains his gaze on Lochlyn as he says the last part.

“It’s not intentional. Sorry, I’ll try to stop.” With a quick movement, he tugs Shay’s chair closer and takes her hand in his before placing it below the table. He’s irritated and trying to use her to calm himself. “It’s weird in this different setting. This is a fairly romantic atmosphere with the dimmed lighting and music. Clearly a date instead of just dinner or hanging out at the apartment. It’s just a bit awkward to me, and I’m trying to make it not be.”

“Well, try harder.”

“Weston. It’s okay. Lochlyn’s protective.” I try to calm him. We don’t need any arguing going on tonight.

“He doesn’t need to be. I’m not going to do anything to hurt you. I won’t hurt her, Loch. You know that. We’ve talked about how I feel about her.” Wait, they’ve talked about his feelings for me? What are they? Are they more than what he’s told me? Because I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with Wes, and I couldn’t bear it if he doesn’t feel the same way.

“It’s just not easy to let go. She’s my sister; I’ll always be protective of her.” Shay’s alarmingly quiet, but I know she’s just taking it all in, waiting to calm the storm if she needs to.

The uneasy silence continues for a few minutes while the boys glare at each other. I don’t know the best course of action here. Let them fight it out? Let it stay as is? Should I leave? Maybe assuming Shay would intervene was wrong.

“Guys. Everybody needs to take a deep breath. Lochlyn, we’ve discussed this, and Chelsea’s happy, and we’re happy for her. Wes too, since he’s your best friend. And everybody is good that we’re together. So, let’s move on and talk about something else instead of how irritated we are by things that we don’t need to be irritated about. Okay?” And there it is.

Since everything went down with the three of us, Shay’s become much more likely to tell it how it is, putting her foot down when necessary. Lochlyn immediately eases, his posture loosening, and he sinks in his chair.

“Shay, I’ve been meaning to tell you, Marissa invited us to a party in her room. She said the boys can come if they want.”

“Wait, she’s still having that? I thought it was to celebrate her time with that guy and then they broke up?” Wes spends so much time at my dorm that he knows the drama almost as much as I do, but likely more than Shay does.

“She’s now saying it’s a party to celebrate breaking up with him. Who knows. But it might be fun. Shay? What do you think?”