Page 6 of Setting Limits

“I have a boyfriend,” I sing-song right back.

“So you keep saying.”Crack.I swear she’s always chewing gum and cracking it. You can find her anywhere in the store if you listen for it.

Shay and I used to play a game to find her. She’s been working here for about ten years. At the thought of Shay, I pull my phone from my pocket to see if she responded. My heart leaps that she has.

Sorry. Busy prepping to leave. Maybe next time.

The pain in my chest at her absence increases. But it’s fine. The couple of weeks we have left, she can spend on her own if she needs to. It may be good for both of us before we’re together nonstop. Hopefully by then, her attitude will have changed and Lochlyn will be a distant memory. Especially since he’ll likely have a new girl in his bed by the time school starts, if he doesn’t already.

Besides, I’d like to spend as much time as I can with Brendan. He may not be my forever, but he is my right now, and while his attention can be divided when we’re together, I know I’ll miss him as soon as we’re apart.

It’s easy not to appreciate something you have when you get to have it every day. The separation may even rejuvenate things.

I’m not hopeful for that, but it’s possible. The past few days he has been more attentive, asking questions about school and if I’m excited, how things are going with Shay, if I’ve heard from Lochlyn.

That one hurts a lot. I get he’s mad, and maybe he has some right to be, but so am I. He lied to me for months; they both did. He went behind my back and took my best friend. He probably tricked her into falling into bed with him too. And continuing to. But he’s my fucking brother. Somebody who’s supposed to be there for me no matter what, unconditionally, especially after what happened with our parents. Up till now, he always has been.

Since he stormed out after Shay made her choice a few days ago, I haven’t heard from him. He won’t answer my calls. Sure, there were a few days there whileIavoidedhim,but now that’s all corrected, and he should be here. Hell, I’m moving up to where he lives in just a few short days. He should be calling me to see if I need anything, if I need help, if he can do anything for me.

And yet, not a call. Not a text. And all my messages sit onread, completely unanswered. My calls go to voicemail within a few rings, so I know he’s sending them there and his phone’s not off or just ringing endlessly.

It stings in a way I didn’t really think was possible, ripping open closed-over wounds on the way. Ones that never quite healed completely. It’s like that feeling you get when you pull a scab that’s not quite ready to be set free yet. The burning that makes you cringe a little and gasp.

In a pretty big way, I know I’m lucky Shay stuck around. She didn’t have to. But I also know that Lochlyn would have dropped her not too long after. And she probably realized that. The hurt will go away. It’s just because it’s new.

I’m sure of it.

Chapter 5

Yetsomehowafewdays later, as we’re packing and making the drive north to Ithaca, Shay’s still pretty miserable. Aside from moping around, she’s snippy.

“I’m going to take this side, if you’re cool with it.”

Her eyes barely lift from behind the curtain of curls that block her face once we get into the dorm. “Whatever.”

“I was thinking maybe after we get some things put away, we could walk around a bit? Find a coffee shop, maybe?” Coffee will make things better for her. It always has in the past.

A heavy sigh makes her shoulders slump further. “Fine.” It’s like answering me utterly exhausts her.

It’s been a few weeks, and I really thought Shay would have been over it by now. Come to some sort of level ground or acceptance. But she clearly hasn’t. She’s no happier or better off than she was when things broke down.

Have I really destroyed her this much? Has my selfishness really had this much of an impact on her?

It’s also officially the longest I’ve ever gone without talking to Lochlyn. When Mom and Dad started traveling and he had to leave for school, he checked in daily, sometimes more than once a day. Now, it’s been about three weeks without a single word.

Everything is off kilter, nothing feels right.

Classes will surely distract Shay. I can deal with her behavior for a few more days. We don’t get long to move in and become acquainted with our new surroundings. It’s part of why I want to go around campus today. I know Shay likes to have things figured out and planned. It will allow her to know where her classes are, know her routes and what’s around. Help her be more comfortable and confident on day one.

I just wish she’d work with me a little in the meantime. I’m only trying to do what’s best for her. And Lochlyn isn’t it. She’ll realize that someday.

It’s a good size campus, with a fair number of students, but we’re bound to run into Lochlyn at some point. He can’t avoid me forever. I don’t think. That’s when she’ll see it, that’s when she’ll realize he was only using her, and that’s when she’ll thank me. And at the same time, he’ll see that he wasn’t meant to be tied down in a relationship. He’s not built that way.

Walking around campus, I keep glancing at a silent Shay. It’s impossible not to notice how much her eyes dart around.

“Shay. You’re not going to like what you see if you do spot Lochlyn somewhere. There’s no doubt in my mind he’ll have a new girl on his arm. Maybe two.” Lochlyn’s never really been that way at home. He doesn’t flaunt his girls around or act like they’re his girlfriend. I’m pretty sure he just beds them and leaves them. But I need Shay to get the message.

She shrinks in on herself and we keep walking before she comes to a halt, and I have to turn around to look at her. Fire burns in her eyes. “I know he’s your brother, but you know so little about him. He’s nothing like what you think, Chelsea. You’ve let all those rumors go to your head and sway your judgment. But that’s not who he is.” The rage in her eyes now translates into her words. They’re firm and forceful.

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