Page 39 of Setting Limits

“Sure. What’s that?”

“Stop worrying so much. Lochlyn and Shay, for one, don’t know and don’t have to if it’s really important to you, though I don’t understand why. But I know what I’m doing. I know when they will and won’t be around. I need you to just trust me.”

And there’s a magic word.Trust. It’s hard for me. And since things are new with Wes, and whatever it is we’re doing, I haven’t had the time to dive into the reasons why. Sure, he knows a bit from Lochlyn, but he doesn’t knowmyside of things. How I’ve been affected. And how trust is not easy for me to give.

In fact, aside from Lochlyn and Shay, I haven’t trusted anybody in years. When they got together and lied to me, it really crumbled the foundation of that trust, which has been hard for me to fully build back up.

Not to mention, he’s only guaranteed to stay through May. What happens after he graduates? Can I sign on for a relationship with somebody that Iknowmight be leaving in a few months?

Yet I find myself saying, “Okay.” As if it’s just that simple. “Where are we going?”

“There’s a little coffee shop in town. Shay told me about it and likes to frequent it.” This sentiment makes me want to question their friendship, but she’s at his apartment a lot, I don’t expect them to never communicate. Whatever the joke had been about them being friends has to hold some merit, or of course they talk.

Still, it hurts in a way I didn’t expect. Like Shay’s moving on and growing without me. It’s not a bad thing. She’s always been a wallflower that needed to blossom, but it’s unexpected, and I always thought I’d be there to see her bloom.

A squeeze of my hand draws my attention. I hadn’t even realized that Wes had laced our fingers again. “You’re in your head a lot, aren’t you?”

“It’s kind of a newer development.” Very new, in fact. Being in one’s head is more of a Shay thing. She’s a thinker, a worrier. Usually, I’m more of afly by the seat of my pants and hope for the besttype of person.

“Focus on what’s here. Be in this moment with me.” Easier said than done. Especially because I don’t really know what this moment is. He’s made it clear he has feelings for me, and I know that I have something nibbling below the surface for him. But is it enough?

“Sorry, I’ll try.”

Wes holds the door open to the coffee shop once we arrive, and the moment I cross the threshold, I can tell why Shay loves it here. It’s quaint and the aroma of coffee wraps around you the second you walk in. There’s a bookshelf in one corner and couches scattered about. The menus on the wall are all written in chalk with cutesy names and drawings.

“Hmm. A little excessive, don’t you think?” Without turning around, I can tell there’s a scowl on his face as he takes in our surroundings.

“Definitely a Shay place. She loves anything coffee, but these little shops are totally her jam.”

He takes a step forward, putting his hand on my waist and pulling me along with him. While we wait for the single barista, he loops a finger through my belt loop. It feels natural, like we’ve been doing it for years instead of the fact that this is our second date. I’m not quite sure what to do with that.

“What are you thinking?” I’m in the middle of taking in the impressively extensive menu when he asks me.

“Uh, just a coffee is fine. Nothing special.”

One of his eyebrows hikes halfway up his face. “No way. What do you want?”

I open my mouth to answer, but the barista comes over. And before I have a chance to order a coffee, Wes intervenes. “She’ll have a caramel macchiato with extra caramel, and I’ll have an Americano. Both medium please.”

“I was going to have just a regular coffee.”

“I know that’s what you said, but I also know that macchiato is your favorite.”

Heat prickles at the back of my neck, and I want to reach back to scratch at it, but he’d pick up on my discomfort. “How exactly do you know that?” I ordered coffee in front of him one time, but how does he know that’s my usual and not just a one-time craving?

“It came up with Shay once. I filed it away for safekeeping.”

“Why would you do that?”

He turns to face me full on, keeping his hand at my side but now wrapping his fingers around my waist. His gaze is deep and intense. “I think you know why.”

And I do know why, because it’s exactly the same reason I have. It’s a strange thought that Wes and I have both secretly been keeping track of these tiny details for such a long time, probably without even realizing we were doing it.

Not knowing what to say to that, we stand in silence and creep closer to the register as we wait for our order. But unlike with some others, it’s not an uncomfortable silence. It’s not filled with wondering what to say or how to act. It just…is.

It’s that unfamiliar comfort I’ve always felt with Wes. At first, I thought it was just his outgoing, upbeat personality. I didn’t think there was much he took seriously. But the more I’ve gotten to know him, and now that we’re actually spending time together, that comfort seems like more. Like something deeper.

Wes walks over to one of the few tables with chairs and flops into a seat, leaning backward with his arm flung over of the back of the chair.

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