Me:Bye Wes.
Glancing up, I find Lochlyn’s eyes scrutinizing me in the rearview mirror for a second before he looks back at the road, then at me again. I take a minute to observe the scene. Shay’s asleep, Lochlyn’s hand firmly on her thigh while the other is loosely on the top of the steering wheel. And I have a giant smile on my face. So big my cheeks hurt.
Instead of Lochlyn saying anything, his eyes crinkle as he smiles and looks back at the road.
The rest of the drive goes by in a blur as I think about movie night, anticipation building within me.
Chapter 16
IlovethewayLochlyn has pulled Shay out of her shell. She’s looser, freer, happier. He’s helped her grow into who I always knew she could be. Only he has been able to bring out the stronger sides of her.
It’s the strong resilience that I see in her during Thanksgiving dinner. This can’t be easy on her, not just because her mom seems happy, though she was basically absent for years. But it’s also that there’s some new man in her mom’s life, essentially replacing her dad. Shay probably doesn’t see it that way, and in the few days we had to digest the information that her mom had a new beau, she never said anything of the sort.
Thankfully, Don is a pleasant man who makes good conversation. Every time I look over at Lochlyn, he not only has a hand on Shay, but he’s eyeing Don. After everything this family has been through, I’m sure he’s sizing up Don and doing his best to ensure he’s good for Shay’s mom, and possibly even Shay.
Dinner’s actually delicious, and I know Lochlyn’s happy he didn’t have to cook anything. Shay had been worried it would be too much for her mom to take on after the head space she’d been in for months. But her mom is like a different person, even to me.
She’s smiling, laughing, and seems more upbeat than I’ve seen her in years. She welcomes us with a large smile and has about a dozen different things going on in the kitchen at the same time. I can’t even remember the last time I saw her outside of the store, let alone in the kitchen.
Shay’s parents always loved cooking together. It’s one thing I remember being jealous of. That Shay’s parents not only cooked but enjoyed doing it together. Until they started leaving, I didn’t think my parents even liked being in one another’s company.
After dinner, Lochlyn, Don, and I retire to the living room while Shay helps her mom clean up. Her mom actually requested her help, which is something I know hasn’t happened in years. Lochlyn’s gaze keeps darting to the door, and I know he’s probably as worried about Shay as I am, if not more.
“I know things have been difficult for the girls, but I want you both to know I have strong feelings for Jane. From everything she’s said and the small impression I’ve gotten from Shay today, she’s a lovely girl.” Don leans back in the oversized chair as he speaks. It’s clear he’s very comfortable here.
“Shay’s an amazing woman, Don. I think if you’re around enough, you’ll see why I’m so entranced by her.” It’s very Lochlyn to call Don by his first name. No pleasantries, right to the point. I know it’s to show that he’s a man and in a protective role for Shay.
“I know Jane is happy that Shay has both of you to lean on, that she’s had you for some time now. It makes her absence a little easier to swallow, knowing Shay wasn’tentirelyalone.”
“There’s nowhere else we’d be. Right, Chels?” That’s when he looks at me and I perk up. Good thing I was at least paying attention.
“Of course not. Shay’s been my best friend for most of my life. There’s no way I’d leave her under any circumstance.” Me leaving her and her leaving me are two different things. And the ultimatum I placed months ago would have been Shay leaving me, even if by my hand.
“Very good. If you’ll excuse me for a second.”
We both nod as Don stands and walks out of the living room, leaving Lochlyn and I alone. Things are far better, but still a bit tense at times.
“Hey Lochlyn, can I ask you something?” Conversation helps ease the tension.
“Sure, sis, what’s on your mind?”
“Do you and Shay ever fight? Or argue, even?” It feels like that’s all Brendan and I do lately. Maybe all we've really ever done. That and have sex, which has always been somewhat subpar.
“Of course we do, Chels. We’re just like any other couple.” I highly doubt they’re anything likeanyother couple.
“You guys are just always so happy.”
Sighing heavily, he looks at the ground, finger running over the tattoo on his finger that I’ve since learned he got for Shay. It’d make me sick if it wasn’t so damn adorable.
“So, before you knew, Shay and I got into a pretty big fight, in March. It was before midterms, and she had some insecurities. It was enough that I cut our call short that night and every night for the rest of the week. She was afraid I was going to break up with her over it, which killed me. For her to think—” He stops short and shakes his head. The way his shoulders are slumped, I can tell this is painful for him to talk about.
Before I can tell him he doesn’t have to finish, he starts talking again. “It was actually the night you left for skiing. We sat down and had a conversation. I told her why I was upset, and she told me her feelings and where they were coming from. Really, it just came down to needing to communicate with each other better.
“We still get into disagreements. You probably don’t know this, but there was one time somewhat recently she was mad at me for something and basically didn’t talk to me for three days. She’d still tell me she loved me, she’d answer questions, though as basically as she could, and she’d still curl into me at night.” He laughs and runs his fingers along his mouth as he remembers.
“There’s been nothing huge, nothing life altering. We’re different people with different thoughts and feelings and opinions. But we love each other…so much. That’s what’s always able to bring us back to where we’re happy.”
I sit quietly as I mull over this information. Mostly, what I get is that it requires communication. And love.