Page 11 of Setting Limits

The tears I’d been trying to keep inside begin to well in my eyes. “Shay, the things he said…I’d kill for a guy to say them about me. We’ve all known each other a long time. I never really thought he was paying much attention. I was wrong. And it’s clear you’ve learned a lot about each other over the years and the time you’ve had together.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, to both of you. I realized that the reason I’ve always been so against you two was two-fold and selfish. First, I was afraid I wouldn’t be important to either of you anymore. And I was afraid I’d lose you if you two broke up. That it’d be too hard for you to be near me after. There’s theslightestchance I have some abandonment issues.” To say the least. That’s what happens when your parents ditch you for fun and sun as a teenager. “But I gave you an unfair choice, and you chose me. You gave up love for me. And while you haven’t exactly been pleasant since then, you’ve been here.

“I guess this is my long-winded way of saying that I give you my blessing or whatever. I’m okay if you two are together. It’s going to besuperweird knowing that you’re sleeping together, so we for sure will need a system so I don’t walk in on anything again, but I want you two to be happy. You’re my two favorite people in the world, and I’m honestly glad you found happiness in each other.”

I really hope I mean what I’m saying. I want to, I really do. But some part of me inside is still really uneasy and squirmy. I’ve never known Lochlyn to be a one-woman man. It’s clear there are parts of him and truths to him I’ve never seen, maybe even if only because I didn’t want to or wasn’t willing to.

The second I stop talking, Shay falls into Lochlyn, like the block that had been there is finally removed and nothing is stopping her. He folds his arms around her as he kisses the top of her head. Her tears start flowing again, the tears that make my heart ache every time, knowing I caused them. I bite my cheek to keep mine at bay. Cupping her chin with his hands Lochlyn brushes the tears away with his thumbs, leaning down to kiss her.

I can’t suppress the smile on my face, as I wipe a tear from my own cheek. They fit together. I don’t know how I didn’t see it.

“I missed you. So much.” It comes out just above a whisper, but I hear Shay’s words.

Lochlyn rests his forehead against hers, hands on her cheeks. “You have no idea, baby, no idea.” His lips are against hers again. I slowly start to back away. I’m not sure where I’ll go, but it’s clear they need their time alone.

It’s the very least I can do to give it to them.

Chapter 8

OnceI’moutofthe dorm, I have to block my eyes against the harsh light. I don’t know where to spend my time, so I just start walking. I end up in the center of campus.

I’m looking all around at how utterly beautiful Cornell is with all of the leaves slowly starting to change when I bump into something hard and warm. “Oops, I’m so sorry!”

Glancing up, I’m met with cobalt eyes.

“Weston? How are you…I just saw you, like, a half hour ago at your apartment.”

“Yeah, I figured I’d make myself scarce in case Lochlyn decided to bring Shay back.”

“They’re at the dorm, so you’re probably good to return.” I certainly can’t say the same for me. I’ll need to kill time for at least forty-five minutes. That seems fair.

He lifts one shoulder and one side of his mouth. “Nah, that’s okay. I have class in an hour anyway. And I decided to pack a bag, so I’ll spend the night at Claire’s, stay away for a while so they can reconcile on their terms.”

A chill runs through me at the mention of Claire’s name. One that I have no right to feel. “Claire? Your girlfriend, right?” He had said that last year she had been on and off again. Maybe she’s old news?

“Uh, sure. She’s my something, at least. Not sure girlfriend quite fits the bill.”

Silence takes over, and I shift on my feet, not sure what to say. Especially knowing what thesomethinglikely means. Friends with benefits. It’s not my place to feel anything about Weston being promiscuous, and I’m not sure how I’d feel if I knew he was thinking anything about my sexual history. But it makes my stomach freeze over.

“I won’t keep you, but I just want to say I’m happy you gave Lochlyn a chance, that you heard him out. I know it means a lot to him, and I hope they’re in a good place. It clearly is something you were adamant about, and while it may be uncomfortable for you, I’m glad you’re trying to fix things.”

His words shouldn’t have the effect on me that they do, but I find myself standing a little taller, a little prouder. “Thanks, Wes. I know I have a lot to make up for, and I hope that they can find their way back to each other and then find a way to forgive me, because I definitely don’t deserve it.”

“I don’t know that I’d go that far. They did lie to you.” He has a point there. But they never should have had to.

“They did, and it’s not something I have forgotten or will likely easily forget because it does hurt. But it never should have been an issue or choice they had to make. I shouldn’t have been so closed-minded about the situation. I have some of my own issues that came into play and took over, which made it hard for me to see things more clearly.”

“From what I know of your parents, that makes sense.”

Wait, did I hear him right? Is there actually somebody who understands what it’s like besides Shay and Lochlyn? Not sure what to say to that, I let the noise of people bustling around us to fill the void.

But Wes doesn’t let it linger long. “Hey, I was on my way to grab a coffee. Want to join me? I was up way too late playing video games last night. Need that mid-afternoon boost.”

“Uh, sure.” I’ll join him, but I’m buying my own coffee. Shay’s mom gave me a little extra before I left, and my parents have restarted minimal deposits now that I’m enrolled. I save everything I can for situations such as this. Coffee, shopping, nails, all the things I have to sacrifice for and ration.

Wes holds the door for me, and he’s tall enough that I can walk under his arm. I’ve never really paid much mind to his height, but it certainly is nice.

“Can I have a medium iced caramel macchiato please?” I order and pay before Wes has a chance to offer.

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