Page 27 of Off Limits

I’ve never lied to my parents. This secrecy between me and Lochlyn is causing me to do things I don’t normally do. I’m lying to Chelsea and Mom. But it’s all worth it.

As quietly as I can, I shut the heavy mahogany door behind me, pulling a long sweater duster tight against me to block out the chill in the air. I don’t see Lochlyn anywhere as I move around the side of my house, thankful there isn’t any snow on the ground since I threw on my slippers.

Suddenly, I feel his arm wrap around my waist, pressing against my back, his breath a gentle puff in my ear. He spins me around to face him, mouth claiming mine as he pushes me back against the house.

Reaching his hands down to my thighs, he lifts me up. I wrap my legs around his waist, tangling my fingers in his hair as he puts one hand against the side of my face. Ending the kiss, he rests his forehead against mine, our breath swirling tendrils of steam in the space between us. He lowers me to the ground, his hand settling against my chest, just below my neck.

“Hi,” he whispers.

“Hi.” I close my eyes, breathing him in.

“I just wanted to see you one last time before I leave tomorrow. I’m heading out early. I wish…I wish I could come see you. But you know I can’t.”

“I know,” I whisper, keeping my eyes shut tight to keep the tears at bay. It doesn’t work.

His thumbs brush the droplets before they reach my chin. “Hey now, no crying.”

“I don’t want you to forget about me.” How much more pathetic can I sound?

“Impossible.”

I choke out a sob.

“Shay, listen to me. I’ll be back in March for the break, and we’ll spend time together. It’s not as far away as it seems. Maybe you can come visit me. We can figure something out.” He takes a breath, swallowing audibly. “I’m not the sex-crazed monster my sister makes me out to be. Nor am I the guy my reputation says I am. I wantyou,Shay. I only want you. I’ve always wanted you.”

I open my eyes for the first time and look up at him. His eyes are trained on mine, filled with sincerity. It only makes things worse.

My fists tangle into his shirt as I bury my face in his chest. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me closer and holding me as I cry. I hate that I spend so much time in tears around him. I’m not usually a crier.

After a few minutes, he takes my face between his hands and tilts it so that I look at him, then kisses me tenderly. “You know I’d love nothing more than to sleep wrapped around you tonight, but I have to go. I’ll call you when I get there tomorrow.”

I nod, my eyes filling with warm, salty liquid again as he presses a long kiss on my forehead, then another on my lips before backing away. My hand presses against my chest where his had rested a moment ago as I watch him walk away, hoping beyond all hope he won’t forget about us, about me.

Chapter 7

“Chelsea,I’mturningnineteen.You don’t get a big party at nineteen.” She just sprung on me the fact that she wants to throw me a party, in true Chelsea fashion. I’m not exactly feeling in the party mood, as I'm not over missing Lochlyn yet.

“You didn’t have a party at eighteen, so we’re just celebrating a year late.”

I catch myself sighing, though I know it’s pointless. “Chels, come on. I don’t want a party.” The only thing I really want for my birthday is Lochlyn. He’s been gone two weeks and the daily text messages and calls just aren’t enough. I need to see him, to feel him.

Exasperation spreads across her face as she turns to look at me, rolling her eyes before they widen. “Shay, you’ve had a rough few years. Let’s just have fun. It’s your birthday. I just want you to let go. Foronenight.”

“I’m not going to get drunk, Chels.”

“Did I say you should? I said let go. That can have many meanings. Including just spending the night with some fun people.”

“How big are you planning?”

She smirks, knowing she’s wearing me down. “Nothinghuge.Just us, Bren, some of the girls we’ve met at school. I told them they could invite their boyfriends if they have one.”

“Wait, you already planned it all?” She just said she wants to, not that she already told a bunch of people.

Her shoulders and eyebrows raise in unison. “Oops.” But a smile plays across her lips.

“What if I said no, Chels? Like adamantly said no?” It was a strong possibility. There have been many a party I’ve declined attending.

“I’d either have found a way to convince you or just had a party for myself.”

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