Page 73 of Boss Level

“He died with regrets.” The ache in my chest swelled with the memories. “He left things in this life unfinished and he didn’t want this for either of us. I won’t do that to me. To Xander. I won’t be on my deathbed tomorrow or fifty years from now and wonderingwhy didn’t I just…”I couldn’t.

Roger sighed heavily. “I see. Well, I can’t have you working for my firm if you can’t present a proper front.”

Hisfirm? Fuck that. We’d built this place together. We’d…

Nothing. “Acting straight isproper? Fuck you.” I was done here.

“What are you going to do? Start over? At this point in your life?”

Yeah, I was. “Yes. Because I’m still alive. I’m still breathing, and I’m tired of molding myself to someone else’s vision of the world. Yours. Dale’s… So, yes, consider this my resignation. My notice of intent to part ways. I’m moving on with the people I love, and if this is what you want from life, you can stay here and collect asshole clients, because you’re willing to let a large retainer dictate your ethics.”

“You’ll regret this.” That wasn’t the most cliche thing Roger could’ve said, but it was close.

I shook my head. “No. I’m done regretting things. You, on the other hand, will wonder for the rest of your life what you could’ve had if you’d stopped hiding.”

25

judith

Claire was in her room Thursday night, but she’d made dinner again. I tried to draw her out, to thank her, to talk to her…

She wouldn’t come out.

But at least she was still here.

Was it odd that I just wanted the company? I’d been coming home to an empty place for years and been fine with it. My friends were the people at work. Xander. Dominic.

Friday morning, she was still there, and still hiding.

Damn it.

I got to the office early. One thing to look forward to—with the root problem of our game crashes solved yesterday, things should run smoothly today. Did I dare hope I wouldn’t have to ask the staff to work extra hours over the holidays?

There was a generic meeting on my calendar for nine, Ivan hadn’t gotten back to me yet about who it was with. When Elliot walked into my office at five minutes until, I had an idea, and I was happy to see him, but there was no reason to get all mushy about it.

“I have a meeting,” I said.

He dropped into a chair as if I’d invited him to stay for the day. “With me. You get to talk to me for the next hour.”

The only thing that sucked about that was when the hour was up, he wasn’t going back to his desk. “To do what?” I asked. “I’m already on your side. I’m not the one you need to convince.”

“This isn’t like you.” Elliot’s words cut through me. “Standing aside. Not fighting. Pretending this is out of your hands?”

“Do you think I like having lost control of this situation?” The question snapped past my lips. “I don’t want you gone and neither does anyone else.”

“Then let me stay.”

“We’re not those kids anymore. Our world has rules and consequences.” Not what I meant to say, and the words hit me hard. Was I talking to him or me?

The way he rubbed his wrists, the scars we all pretended we didn’t know about, told me I’d struck a nerve in both of us. “Why didn’t you and I ever hook up?” he asked.

Because you’re like the brother I never had and that would be weird. “Because you’re not ambitious enough for me.” Cole hadn’t been either.

Xander was. Dominic. They had the kind of drive that was sexy. The kind of push…

… That kept us apart.

“Besides”—I wanted to keep this about Elliot— “You’ve always been in love with Link.”

---