Page 14 of Seventeen Years Ago

Fate had done just what I thought. It brought me back to the one place that tormented me in my dreams. Now was my chance to face what I did, and maybe then I could move forward.

But not until I know that Aiza has been able to.

CHAPTER8

Aiza

I barely got any sleep last night. Steven was on my mind. Nothing new, but now I had a name to go along with the memories. This still was different. I no longer saw his face as the young man who was in that hotel room. His eyes were no longer filled with fear and uncertainty. Mine weren’t either. That night had been hell, but I still really didn’t know why he’d been so nervous. He was the one who’d paid my corrupt government for an eighteen-year-old virgin. Someone like that is...beyond disgusting. I wanted to loathe him, but there was something in me that wasn’t letting me.

Staring up at my bedroom ceiling, I thought back to that night. I’d been so afraid, yet I knew that pleading for him to stop, to let me go, wasn’t going to do anything. I wasn’t the first young woman and unfortunately, wasn’t the last either. Tabiq’s source of revenue was human trafficking. The men who came here and paid money for us didn’t care about our feelings. If they did, they never would have come.

But Steven was different. I remember him undressing me and I stood still, like a statue. I brushed all thoughts, and emotions, away. His hands had fumbled with the buttons. Then he stripped off his clothes, led me to the bed, and I laid down. When he climbed on top of me, I forced myself to keep my eyes open. I wanted to remember the eyes of the man who was about to take my innocence.

Steven brushed the hair from my face and just stared down at me, meeting my gaze. He stroked my cheek, kissed me lightly, then spoke.

“I need you to promise me something.” Of course, I had agreed. It wasn’t as though I had been in any position to argue back then. Heck, even now if I were in the same situation, I’d have said anything to appease the man who could do me harm. Yet things were different now. Back then, even if I screamed, no one would come to my aid. The people who ran that hotel knew what was happening, but they were on the payroll, just like the corrupted police.

My life and wellbeing was in the hands of that stranger. I had prepared myself for the worst, but it was what he said next that shocked me. “You can never tell anyone that we didn’t have sex. You must pretend as though I’ve taken your innocence. If anyone ever learns the truth, my father will come here, and you and everyone you love will pay the price. Can you promise never to say a word to anyone?”

Once I nodded, he rolled off me, and told me to get dressed. We sat in the room for a few hours, not speaking. He just stared at the wall, not even looking at me but I saw his hands had been clenched into fists. I had been too afraid to utter a word in fear that he’d change his mind.

When he finally stood up, he walked over to me, grabbed the sleeve of my dress and tore it. Then he tussled my hair to look like a mess and told me to leave, but only after reminding me of my promise. I had fled from the room, and only once my feet hit the streets outside, did the tears stream down my cheeks.

I had been spared. He didn’t rape me. He didn’t hurt me. I had no idea why, and to this day, I still don’t.

New tears streamed down my face as the emotions filled me again. I was the lucky one. If it had been anyone other than Steven, I’d have lost my virginity that night, and so much more. But the fact that I honored my word and never told anyone the truth, made it into a burden that no one understood.

Tabiqian women never spoke out about what we’d been through. We had no outlet or counseling. We kept all our pain inside. It was unhealthy, but we never knew any other way.

As I passed other women who very likely had been victimized, my heart broke for them. I didn’t want to know what they’d been through, but I could imagine.

All this cruelty started long before I was born. It started almost fifty years ago when James Henderson came to Tabiq and used his money and power to influence the greedy evil president we had back then. So many horrible things happened because of that. So many years of women living in fear.

It had been several years since we had been freed from such horrendous acts. Yet we hadn’t forgotten. I have been given the chance to confront the person who came to Tabiq with ill intentions, and I needed to do so quickly. The longer I waited, the more excuses I will come up with not to.

Like lying in bed for the rest of my life.

There was a knock on my bedroom door. “Aiza, are you going to work this morning?” my grandmother asked.

And there goes the staying in bed.

“Yes Grandma. I was just about to get up.”

“I have breakfast waiting for us.”

“Thank you,” I said, tossing the blanket off and dragging myself from the bed. I quickly showered and dressed knowing that breakfast consisted of fruit and coffee.

When I entered the kitchen, she was seated at the table. “You didn’t sleep well, did you?” she asked.

“No,” I replied, taking a bite of mango.

“Are you still worried about that party on Sunday?”

I shook my head. “No. I have other things on my mind.”

“Want to talk about it?” she offered.

“It’s nothing you can help me with,” I said. “It’s business stuff.” Not really a lie. Steven had gone to the office for a business meeting.

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