Page 31 of Seventeen Years Ago

“So your feelings towards them have changed?” she asked.

I chuckled. “It’s a work in progress.”

We finished eating and I asked, “Did you want to take a walk on the beach and talk?” I promised myself to tell her before she left, but I didn’t want to do so within earshot of anyone. She needed to have her privacy to deal with the blow she was about to receive.

She agreed and we kicked off our sneakers and headed towards the water. Walking with our feet in the breaking waves, she said, “You look like you have a lot on your mind. Something went wrong with the meeting this morning?”

“No. Reesa is probably one of the most detail-oriented people I’ve met. She’s given me a lot to think about,” I admitted.

“But you’re not sure you want to do it?” she asked.

“No. I want to do it, but I’m not the right person to do it. She should find someone better suited for it,” I said.Someone who hadn’t brought harm to Tabiq.

“Reesa wouldn’t tell me what the project is, but I know whatever it is, she was disappointed that you might turn it down. Are you sure you won’t reconsider?” she asked.

I hadn’t told Reesa my decision, but she was perceptive and knew that I was considering it. “I thought we weren’t talking about business?” I reminded her.

“Okay. What did you want to talk to me about then?” she asked.

I stopped walking and she did the same. “Aiza, I really enjoy my time with you. You're an amazing woman. I hope you know that.”

“Thank you. I’ve enjoyed our time as well. Is this your way of telling me you’re leaving for the United States?”

“I’m scheduled to leave next week, but I may go early.” Like, I might need to pack my bags and leave tonight depending on how this conversation goes.

“Then I’m glad we had this time tonight, just in case I don’t get to see you again.”

“I can’t leave without talking to you about something. It’s not going to be easy for me to say, or for you to hear. I’m not even sure where to start,” I stated.

“I’m listening. You can tell me anything,” she said.

But can I say the words that I have held back for so long?

“You had told me a little about Tabiq. How you don’t talk about things, and you keep them bottled up inside. It’s no way to live.”

“I agree. But it’s how we have lived for a long time. We are lucky when we find a person who we can share even the most painful things with.”

“Have you found such a person? Have you been able to confide even your deepest secrets?” I asked.Like the one I made you promise to keep seventeen years ago.

“No. I haven’t,” she said, her eyes filled with sadness.

“I have a secret that I want, no more like one that I must share with you. It’s about something that happened a very long time ago.” I could feel the tension building in my body just thinking about telling her.

“Steven, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” she stated. “Some secrets are best never shared.”

“I wish I could. But this one haunts me. And I’ve decided that it is time to break my silence.”

“Okay. I am here to listen to you. And I promise I won’t tell anyone else,” she said.

Those words were like a knife in my side. Here she was promising me, the one who hurt her, the one who was about to break her trust.

“I am not asking you to promise me anything. I am the one making you a promise. That once I tell you what I have to say, I’ll do what you ask.”Even if that is to turn myself in to the police.It's not what I want to do, but if it was what she needed in order to heal, then fuck it, I’ll spend the rest of my life in an eight-by-eight cell.

“Steven, you’re not making any sense,” she said.

“I know. It's just I don’t know how to tell you this. It’s not something you want to hear,” I said.

“Are you married,” she asked.

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