Page 60 of Paradise Pride

“To some extent—at least, two days a week when I have custody. But I’ll still be living here for a few years. I can’t afford to buy a property just yet.” He laughed. “It’ll work out one way or the other. My mother has assured me of that, she’s going to help me out. So, what about you? How are you feeling about going back?”

“In two minds,” Florence said. “I’m looking forward to seeing my father and some of my friends in London, but I’ll also miss Mum and my friends here. Especially you.”

“I’ll miss you too, Flo.” Manuel held up his bottle and clinked it against hers. “And what about Meghan? She lives in London, right? Any plans of meeting up?”

“I don’t think so. I’m done with straight women,” Florence said half-heartedly, then turned around at the sound of another message. She searched for her phone, which had landed between her pillows, and held her breath as she read it.

Hi, it’s Kim here, Meghan’s friend. I stole your number while she went to the bathroom, hope you don’t mind. Can we talk?

59

Meghan

Meghan had partied in Soho on numerous occasions, but tonight, she felt as if she were here for the first time. The bars in Dean Street were crowded as always on a Friday night. Most of the patrons drinking outside were men, she noticed, and that confirmed her research before she came here. There were dozens of gay bars for men in London but only a few for women. She’d never realised that before when she strolled through these very streets full of confidence, looking for a fun place to have a final drink with friends before heading home. It wasn’t a big deal back then, but it was now.

She felt like an outsider, some curious weirdo who was eager to find out what the gay community got up to on the weekend. Everyone seemed to know each other, as hugs and kisses were exchanged, and Meghan made sure not to look anyone in the eyes. They would immediately recognise her insecurity and maybe even feel sorry for her since she was wandering around on her own looking lost and out of touch with herself and the world at large. Tightening the tie on her trench coat and re-wrapping her scarf around her neck, she walked two blocks, then turned a corner. The bar looked the same as it did on her Google search, only less busy. A few women were waiting by the door, but the queue wasn’t as long as the ones in front of the men’s bars.

“Want to come in?” a young girl waiting in the front of the queue asked Meghan when she noticed her looking. “Make up your mind. We’re going in any minute, and you can pretend you’re with us.”

“Ehm…yes, sure,” she said, joining them as the security guard opened the door. “Thank you.”

“No worries. I’m Ashton.”

“Meghan.” She shook Ashton’s hand.

They headed down to a basement, a modern, white space filled with women. It felt like a secret meeting place, even though she doubted any of them made a secret of coming here.

“Can I buy you a drink, Meghan?” Ashton shot her a flirtatious smile.

Meghan had a suspicion the girl was no older than twenty, but she was nervous being here by herself and any company was better than none. “How about I buy you a drink instead?” she suggested. “But I don’t want anything from you. Let’s just be clear on that. I came here because…well, because I’ve never been here before.”

Ashton laughed. “Okay, your loss, lady. But I’ll have that drink. A lager, please.”

Meghan nodded and made her way to the bar while Ashton talked to her friends. She was way too young for her, and Meghan had no interest whatsoever, but she did admire the girl for her confidence, and her carefree attitude reminded her of Florence.

“Here you go,” she said, handing Ashton the pint after waiting forever for her turn to order. She’d bought a double vodka and soda for herself, as she needed something strong. “Cheers.”

“Cheers.” Ashton regarded her. “So, what are you doing here? Forgive me for saying this, but you look like you’re totally out of your comfort zone.”

“I’m not surprised you noticed.” Meghan gave her a smile. “I’ve never been to a women’s bar.”

“I thought so. I could tell from the way you were standing there, staring at the door.” Ashton chuckled. “That’s why I gave you a nudge.”

“I appreciate that. I’ll admit, I’m uncomfortable and I’m not sure why I’m here.”

“I was wondering about that too,” Ashton said, narrowing her eyes at her. “I was just trying my luck, but you don’t give off an ‘I’m available’ vibe, and I’m sorry to disappoint you, but requests to join women and their husbands in bed is not welcomed with open arms around here.” Ashton pointed to a woman who was trying to climb on the bar only to be pulled off by the bouncer. “Apart from Shanita over there. She’s up for anything, anytime.”

Meghan sipped her drink and laughed. She finally managed to relax a little now that she was absorbed in the crowd and didn’t feel so visible anymore. “There’s no husband,” she said, then decided to be honest. “I’m gay, I think.”

“You think?”

“No,” Meghan said, changing her mind. “I’m gay, period.”

“Oh.” Ashton gave her a lob-sided smile. “And you only realised now?”

“Hey, I’m notthatold,” Meghan protested. “But yes, I’m a late bloomer. I honestly had no idea I liked women.”

“How are you so sure you like women now? Have you gone there? Because I can help you with that.”

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