Page 111 of In Control

It’s a fair point, and anyway, I think he is right about taking this from the beginning.

“Goodbye then,” I call as I step down from the doorstep and walk down the path. He stands there watching me go, not turning away until I’m out of sight.

The 16th can’t come soon enough.

* * *

Although there’d beenthis promise to keep things respectable for the next two weeks, I didn’t believe three alphas and an omega would actually be able to hold up their end of the bargain. However, I’m surprised to find they do. Even when I give in halfway through the second week and get a tad flirty over text, my messages are met with polite responses that swiftly detour us back to safer ground.

It’s funny because, keeping it PG-safe for all this time, has me wanting them even more than I did before. Or maybe that’s just because I haven’t seen them for fourteen long days – even Esra who is at home recuperating and not in the department.

Or perhaps because we’ve laid our cards on the table, opened our hearts, revealed how we really feel, I’m now keen to see what it will be like to be with men I really care about and who care for me too.

I keep myself busy. True to her word, Rosie finds me a shrink and I book an emergency appointment. The first two appointments are tough, and I can tell the issues I need to unpack will be painful. I can also see it will do me good. Just opening up to the woman in that first session has me feeling a little lighter as I leave her office despite the numerous tears I’d spilled.

I move Newton into Rosie’s place, along with some of my other belongings, packing the rest of my things up and placing them in storage. I’m not going back to that apartment. I’m going to have to find somewhere else to live. Where, is going to depend on what I decide I want to do after this PhD and how things go with the pack.

Could I be a packmate?

Could I live with Gabe and the others like that?

Being around Rosie and her alphas makes me think I could. I’ve always been a little greedy for attention and affection, and Rosie has all that in bucket loads. There is always one or other of her alphas about for her to snuggle up with, to chat about her day with, to share a meal with. And at night … well, she’s definitely one satisfied lady.

It’s incredibly cute – if a little nausea-inducing.

Yes, I could definitely live like she does.

By Friday 16th I’m brimming with so much anticipation and excitement, I feel queasy. Those new butterflies that have hatched in my stomach are flitting about like crazed things and I’m so ready to jump the first packmate I see, it’s obscene. Liam texts me in the morning and tells me to be ready by 7pm. I message back asking what I ought to wear. I don’t want to come dressed in some slinky number if we’re headed for KFC, but neither do I want to rock up somewhere like the Ivy dressed in jeans.

After a few minutes, he texts me back,Esra requests that you wear one of your inappropriately short skirts. The rest of us agree this is a very good idea.

A month ago, a message like that would have me rolling my eyes. Now I actually giggle like a schoolgirl. I am that stupidly giddy.

The rest of the day drags and as soon as the clock-hands hit five o’clock, I’m out of college like a bat out of hell and cycling like the wind up to Rosie’s house. She returns an hour later and helps me pick out my outfit (mini skirt included), style my hair and do my makeup. We temper down my usual sex-goddess look, opting for hot girlfriend instead – swapping blood-red lipstick for pink gloss and smoky eyes for pastel colours.

“Wow,” Rosie says, stepping back to admire our work when we’re finally done. “You’re going to give these men heart attacks, Soph.”

“I think they can handle it.”

“Are you sure? They are very old,” she teases. “Practically grandads.”

“They are not. They’re not even old enough to be my dad.”

Rosie starts counting on her fingers. “Well, technically, if they–”

I pick up a pillow from my bed and toss it at her head. “Rosie!”

“Sorry,” she chucks the pillow back at me, “I think old is better for you anyway.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, you scare the shit out of most men our age.” She steps closer and lowers her voice. “Even Duncan’s a little intimidated by you.”

I roll my eyes. All Rosie’s alphas are over six feet tall, built like fridges and sporting stars to boot. There is no way a single one of them is daunted by someone as titchy as me.

“How are you feeling?” my friend asks, straightening the pendant I’m wearing around my neck.

“A little sick and so fucking horny!”

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