Page 51 of All It Takes

I blinked at the sudden rush of tears in my eyes. I had never planned to fall for anyone and sworn up, down, sideways, and upside down that it was never worth it. I wasn’t sure I had what it took to trust. In romance, for me, the mental trust fall exercises never worked. I believed I would fall, and no one would ever be there to catch me. The one time I’d let down my guard, that was precisely what happened.

That was all too much to explain right now. Even though McKenna had pieces of that story because she also learned many years too late that she had a half-brother, none of us would ever know the whole truth because my mother didn’t tell us. It was just as likely that she didn’t know who Chase’s father was. Much as I didn’t want to give my mother credit for anything, in this scenario, it was most likely that she suspected my father was Chase’s father. Because if she thought she could convince Jacob Cannon that he was the father of her child, she would’ve gone for it. She would’ve wanted the money and the prestige of being connected to the family.

As those thoughts bounced against each other like unruly bumper cars in my mind, I looked over at McKenna and shrugged. “We’ve talked. A little. I’m just worried. I have too many of my own issues when it comes to relationships. We have to focus on Ross, and we can’t let our own baggage get in the way.”

McKenna’s brow furrowed with worry. “Why don’t you think it’s worth it? My gut tells me it is. Wes seems like a really nice guy. I asked Phoebe about him. She said he’s totally solid, and he used to be kind of a nerd. He’s a totally sexy hotshot firefighter now.”

I rolled my eyes. “Is there some kind of rule that says if someone’s a nerd, they’re not an asshole?” I teased, trying to knock this conversation off track.

I had already made my decision, but I didn’t want to be talked out of it. I was going to tell Wes we needed to slow this runaway train down. We needed to put a pause on things, especially those crazy kisses. Because my craving for everything I never thought I could have was getting overwhelming and threatening to swamp me.

McKenna didn’t take the bait. She arched a brow, her mouth twisting to the side as she replied dryly, “No rule on that. Back to my point, Wes seems like a good guy.”

* * *

The weekend passed in a blur. I saw Wes two more times. With McKenna and others joining us, we went on a snowshoe hike to a frozen waterfall nearby. Later that night, Ross was with me, and Nilla was waiting by the hallway to go to bed. I glanced over at her, smiling. “She knows the schedule,” I offered.

Ross grinned. A few minutes later, he’d brushed his teeth and changed for bed. I peered into his bedroom to see Nilla curled up beside him with him leaning against the headboard with a book. He liked to read. His serious gaze lifted to meet mine.

“Good night,” I said. “Sleep tight.”

He opened his mouth to say something before he looked down quickly, curling a hand and knuckling a tear that rolled down his cheek.

“Are you okay?” I hurried into the room, sliding my hips onto the bed just as Nilla shimmied closer and rested her chin on his shins.

Ross’s head stayed bowed. “I think so,” he said with a sniffle. “I’ve been missing my mom and dad.”

I ignored the rush of anxiety. Wes and I had talked together and individually with Ross’s therapist about preparing for these moments. I’d practiced what I would say to myself time and again. Because I had to say the right thing. I couldn’t screw this up.

“You’re going to miss them,” I said, striving to keep my tone level and soothing even though I felt a little panicked inside.

He lifted his head and studied me quietly. “Is this okay?”

“That you miss your parents?”

Nilla wiggled even closer, close enough for Ross to bury his hand in her fur. His book slipped off his lap.

Ross shook his head. “That I’m here. That you and Wes are—” He paused, chewing on the inside of his cheek. “In charge of me, like my mom and dad, I guess.”

“Of course it’s okay.” I moved to sit closer, curling an arm around his shoulders as I leaned against the headboard beside him. “Both of us want to take care of you. Your parents were our best friends. Maybe we didn’t know you that well because we lived in different places, but we made a promise because we cared. We’re not just doing this because. We’re doing it because it matters. You matter.”

I could feel the tension reverberating through him. He softened slightly, his head falling forward again. I let my arm shift, my palm sliding in a smooth circle in the center of his back. “I know we talked about it with your therapist, but we hope it’s okay that you have both of us. We hope that we’ve worked out a way for this to be extra. If you prefer to be at one place more, all you need to do is say so.”

He shook his head as he peered up at me. “I like it this way. It’s extra.”

That was the word we had come up with to describe that he had both of us. Both places, both families.

My lips curled in a soft smile. “It is extra.”

“I told Wes it’s okay that you kissed,” he mentioned.

I almost choked. I willed the heat rising up my neck and creeping into my cheeks away. “Okay,” I squeaked, silently cursing.

Ross saved me after that, changing the subject and talking about school and Nilla and wanting to go snowshoeing again.

When I fell asleep a short while later, I resolved to talk to Wes.

ChapterThirty-Four

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