Page 9 of Beautifully Damaged

“People will recognize you in Vegas. You’re supposed to be hiding.”

Joey stopped cleaning and set his hands on his hips. “Oh. That’s true.”

Ben eyed Joey’s body. He had lost weight he couldn’t stand to lose. But while wearing only workout shorts and still moist from his shower, Ben still thought he was the sexiest man alive. Joey chewed on his bottom lip. Ben’s stomach muscles clenched. He had never wanted anyone more.

“We should stay put. You need to rest and heal.”

A sad smile touched Joey’s lips. He looked away. “I’m not very good at sitting still with myself these days.”

“You’re not by yourself. You have me.”

Joey’s gaze slid Ben’s way. “Do I have you?”

“I guess you’ll have to sit still and see. It’s time to eat.” Ben moved to slide past Joey to heat up the takeout he hadn’t been awake to eat. Joey turned as Ben tried getting by. Their bodies brushed, and their gazes met. Heat flared between them like no time had passed since they were together. Words automatically jumped to his lips out of habit and truth. Ben caught them before they fell. Unfortunately, there was no denying the feelings were still there. Ben would probably love Joey until the day he died. No matter what happened in the next two weeks. There was no escaping the life they had once shared.

Ben almost made it through the moment of being too close. Then Joey set his hand on Ben’s side, stopping him from getting away. He swore the heat of Joey’s palm singed his skin. His entire body burned with a mixture of love and lust. Joey’s expression cut through Ben’s emotions, calming him. He looked sad.

“I have something I have to say.” Ben wanted to stop him. He wasn’t ready for confessions. Joey didn’t give him a choice. “Thank you for everything you’ve done. I know the last thing you want is to be stuck with me, much less helping me like this.” A small smile touched Joey’s lips and then fell away just as quickly. “Then again, you always were much better than me.” Joey held his stare, looking more serious than Ben had ever seen. “You were right to walk away from me.”

Ben snagged the back of Joey’s neck and hauled him forward. His mouth slammed down on Joey’s, taking the kiss he wanted, and missed. Ben took no mercy. He licked and sucked, feeling the years fall away. When he pulled away, Joey looked dazed. Ben wanted to pat himself on the back. Instead, he pressed his forehead to Joey’s and then walked away. He would make Joey well. Until then, he couldn’t think about his heart.

ChapterFive

Four days passedin a haze for Joey. He felt terrible. The hospital had wanted to keep him a few more days, but he had checked out against their advice. He hadn’t wanted to take any chances of anyone calling him on the fake story about his injuries. Now he understood why they had wanted him to stay. He couldn’t seem to stay awake. Each time he opened his eyes, Ben fed him, and Joey fell asleep again. Even half out of his head, he knew Ben never left his side. Ben did everything for him without complaint.

On the fifth day, Joey finally felt halfway human again. He woke in Ben’s arms. They were completely entangled. On their sides, facing each other, Joey’s face was buried against Ben’s wide chest. Ben’s leg was thrown over Joey’s hip. Joey’s leg was between Ben’s. There was no space between them. Joey was hyperaware of every place their bodies touched. He closed his eyes and breathed Ben’s scent into his lungs. His lips automatically found Ben’s skin. Ben’s cock stirred between them. Joey’s tongue shot out. He had to taste Ben. There was no way anyone understood how Joey longed for Ben every second of the day. No one let him be himself. But in his heart, only one truth mattered to Joey. He loved Ben. If he could undo every wrong decision that he ever made to reclaim Ben, Joey would do it in a heartbeat.

The thing was, he had done all the bad things and made all the wrong choices. He couldn’t take any of it back. Ben deserved better. Joey gently untangled himself and climbed over Ben. He headed for the bathroom with his head down. Joey didn’t look back. His heart always weighed too much these days. Regret was heavier than he ever dreamed. That was his biggest problem. Joey didn’t know if he could carry it anymore, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to. He knew Gordon had sent him here so he could just get over Ben. There was way more to his issues than that. Joey couldn’t let go of hurting Ben. He didn’t deserve to move on.

With his head bowed and his hands braced on the counter, Joey stared at the sink while seeing nothing except the worst images in his head. Until his dying breath, he would never forget the way Ben had looked at him the day he left. Ben might be helping him now out of pity, but there was no denying his hate. Eventually, Joey would have to go back to L.A., and nothing would be changed.

Joey’s chin lifted. When he caught sight of his reflection, he almost took a step back. No one looked at him with as much hatred as he did himself. Loathing stared back at him in the mirror. Then his gaze landed on a spot over his shoulder. Ben leaned in the doorway, watching him. Joey’s breath caught. Ben watched him with something Joey hadn’t dared to dream he would see again. He was scared to hope.

“You left me.”

Joey swallowed. “I needed a minute.”

Ben closed the distance between them. “You’ve had it.” He swept Joey from his feet and headed back to bed. Ben’s gaze met Joey’s as he set one knee on the bed. His hair was a mess, and he looked sexy as hell. There was something in his eyes. Joey’s breath caught. In a flash, he was beneath Ben’s huge body. Their mouths clashed. Ben pulled away long enough for their shorts to disappear, then he was back. Joey gasped as their nude bodies met. Honest to God, no one understood. It had been so long since he’d felt another man against his skin and Ben owned his heart. The combination of those two things nearly sent his mind off a cliff. He couldn’t stop touching Ben every place he could reach.

Ben kissed a path down Joey’s body. Joey watched it happen while panting and praying Ben didn’t stop. Ben met Joey’s stare as he swallowed Joey’s cock. Joey gasped. His entire body burned while his heart wept. He had ached for Ben with every fiber of his being for the past three years. His mind grappled with the reality of being here with Ben again. He needed more than a blow job. Joey needed to crawl under Ben’s skin and live there. His heart demanded more.

“Fuck me. I need you inside me.” The words were out there with no permission from his brain. Joey didn’t care. He wouldn’t take them back.

Ben kissed his hip. “I don’t have any condoms or anything with me.”

A wicked smile snapped to Joey’s lips. “Yes, you do. I packed your bags.”

Ben didn’t laugh or lose his temper over Joey’s presumptions while packing. His expression turned hungry. “Which bag?”

“The medium-sized black one.”

Ben rolled from the bed in an instant and dug through the bag. He was back with condoms and lube before Joey had time to miss him. Ben stood at the edge of the bed and suited up. He held Joey’s stare as he coated the outside of the condom with lube. Chill bumps rose on Joey’s skin. He knew he should question why Ben would bother touching him again, but Joey wasn’t that stupid. He would take anything Ben willingly gave. Joey was selfish like that.

Ben set one knee on the bed. “We really need to talk about why you thought it was okay to pack condoms and lube for me.”

A shot of fear raced through Joey. He didn’t want Ben to get angry and stop. A nervous-sounding laugh escaped Joey. “You’re on vacation. I wanted you to be prepared if you met someone.” Because they both knew Joey wasn’t Ben’s first choice anymore.

Ben’s face hardened. “Wrong fucking answer.” He lunged forward and bit Joey’s bottom lip in punishment. Ben crawled between Joey’s thighs, making Joey’s lust skyrocket. “Admit you missed me and still had hope.”

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