Page 38 of Arianna

A gift.

The only reason I came here was that Benjamin insisted, almost dragging me by the hair when I told him I didn’t wish to attend because I felt pitiful. The shame crept in when I remembered that I am no longer alone.

He rooted for me every single step of the way, and if my being here makes him shut up about it and be happy?

So be it.

When I woke up this morning, he made his famous chocolate chip pancakes in the form of a graduation cap. At least, that is what I think it was. Lord knows it looked more like a blob than anything else, and before, I would have pointed it out but not at that moment. At that moment, I felt cared for, a thing no one besides nonna had done for me before.

Therefore, I told him 'thank you,' and we both ate quietly as we do every morning before the madness of this day started.

After breakfast, he gave me three dresses to choose from, and I picked a nude, off-the-shoulder mini dress that screamed sophisticated and stylish, not trashy like the other two did. Then I paired it with some clear strap heels. A styling team curled my hair and kept my makeup bare to the minimum.

I am all for glam, but I wasn’t in the mood to have a full face of makeup today just in case my newfound stupid emotions got the best of me.

The team did a great job with my look today. I look beautiful. The leisurely stares I have been receiving from people tell me that much.

Nothing but the best for Mr. Kenton, I see.

I am sure the man owns the world at this point, with how crazy rich, and powerful the man is. I have met rich men before, but not Sebastian, rich.

Then my gaze moves, trying to find the man that helped me make this dream come true, but I know he is not here. He has never come around after that time, and this time will not be any different.

The only glimpses I get of him are from news articles or TV when he does his press conferences and morning shows appearances. I never talk to or ask about him, Benjamin.

But I do find myself at times— okay, mostly— keeping up with his campaign trail and learning everything I can about him through the information the media releases daily. Sebastian is not only one of the youngest politicians in the running for the presidency, but he is the most handsome and eligible, according to Times Magazine.

The way women and some men go gaga over him is embarrassing. Yes, I get it. He is handsome, but so is half of Hollywood, yet you don’t see the public standing outside their houses or workplace asking them to father their children.

Okay, yeah, maybe they do. People are insane these days, but it is still extremely cringe.

Speaking of cringe…

There is no doubt Sebastian would not bother attending the ceremony when he has a new plaything to entertain. His whirlwind romance with French model Thylane Bruna has been front news since he went public with her two weeks after he left me in this city with Benjamin.

It was supposed to be me, the one on his arm, but I guess after meeting me, he found me lacking. He did say he liked his women more… experienced. I should be relieved that he left me alone, and I didn’t have to play the part of his devoted girlfriend to fool the public just as it was intended. Yet, I still don’t understand why it irks me.

He did say that he preferred his women to be more mature.

Damn you, Sebastian, for making me feel small without even trying.

For making me feel things, I cannot make sense of or even want to.

Maybe it is the thought that he found me lacking that angers me because some part of me— a small part— feels insecure when I see the company he keeps, but then I remember who I am, and it goes away.

The jealousy.

The insecurity.

I might be young and somewhat inexperienced compared to all those women, but he would be so lucky to ever land someone like me.

Ugh, he is not even here, and he’s grating on my nerves. That is why I try so hard to keep thoughts of him away because each time, I am left in a bad mood or wanting to commit murder because of how angry he makes me.

That is the power of that man.

I wonder if she knows I am her boyfriend’s dirty little secret. His charity case, but what good does it do him since no one knows about me?

I thought he wanted to show me off to cause a buzz and help his playboy persona in the eyes of the media.

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