Page 40 of Spearcrest Knight

Here, the smell of leather and old paper permeates the air. A peaceful, contented silence reigns. It’s a sort of oasis in Spearcrest. Even the most obnoxious kids sense the consecration of the library when they enter.

With the winter exams having already started for many subjects, I’m not the only person who’s chosen to spend their weekend in the library. Tucked away in a corner of the Modern History section, I sit across from Audrey, who is also taking History.

We take turns holding our notebooks and quizzing each other about Stalin.

Night is falling outside. The soft gold lights and green lamps keep the darkness at bay. An icy drizzle patters against the windows and the cupolas, the sound filling the air like static. After several hours spent going over dates and details of Stalin’s atrocities, we take a much-needed mental health break.

Audrey takes out a thermos from her bag and pours two tin cups of tea.

“Do you think he actually ever had good intentions?” Audrey asks, passing me a cup.

I prop my chin into my palm and stare thoughtfully into the dark amber tea and the steam rising from it. “I mean, even if he did… does it matter?”

“I think so,” Audrey says. “I think I’d respect someone more if they did something bad with the intention of doing something good. You wouldn’t?”

“I don’t think I would. Your intentions can’t affect others, but your actions can. I think if someone did something bad, I wouldn’t give a shit about their intentions.” I raise a pointed eyebrow. “Especially if the bad thing in question is the murder of millions.”

“I mean, I guess that’s fair, and it’s not like I’m saying those murders would be justified even if he did have intentions. But it would make him a slightly different person.”

I try to take a sip of my tea, but it’s still too hot to drink. “Not to me.”

Audrey laughs. “Everything is so black and white to you, Sophe. I kind of love that about you. I always know where I stand with you.”

I laugh too. Crossing my arms on the table, I lie a cheek against them and close my eyes. “Do you think I’m too judgemental?”

Audrey doesn’t answer straight away, which makes me realise she has to think about it.

“No, not judgemental,” she says eventually. “More like… you have high expectations of others. Do you think people think you’re judgemental?”

“No. But Evan implied that’s the reason I don’t have a lot of friends.”

Audrey scoffs. “What would he know? He wouldn’t recognise true friendship if it slapped him in the face. The Young Kings aren’t friends, they’re more like teenage mobsters.”

I laugh, genuinely amused by the image.

“He said I set the bar too high for sincerity,” I add after a moment of silence.

“So what if you do? Good for you for not surrounding yourself with fake friends. Since when have you been talking to Evan anyway? I thought you’d been working at the café instead of tutoring him.”

“I was, but he made me stop so I could prepare him for the Lit exam.”

Audrey leans forward. “What? You didn’t tell me.”

I rest my chin on my arms so I can look at her properly. “I’ve only been doing it since last week.”

“Since when does he even care about the Lit exam?”

“That’s what I said. But he said if he tanks it then it won’t look good since I was meant to be tutoring him. He said it’ll be easier to keep our deal going if he passes the exam.”

Audrey sits back. “Okay, I get the logic. But why doesn’t he just revise if he wants to pass?”

I sigh. “Because he’s a lazy moron who literally knows nothing. And I meannothing. He didn’t even know the plot of Hamlet.”

“Hamlet? I thought you were studying Othello.”

“I am. My class is doing Othello and his is doing Hamlet.”

Audrey’s eyes narrow in their nest of long, curly lashes. “So let me get this straight. Not only have you had to do this idiot’s homework, but now you’re basically studying and teaching a text that you’re not even sitting an exam for?”

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