Page 12 of Vicarious

“Unless he thinks I lied.”

“Maybe,” Dele says. “But then why not call you out on it?”

“Because he doesn’t think you’re capable of deception, Adrian,” Phae interrupts.

I turn to look at her. I’d forgotten that quickly that she was sitting there. That her being alive is the reason we’re even having this conversation.

“What do you mean?”

“There was a reason he wanted you. He needed someone he thought would implicitly trust him. He’s watched you since you were a child, since you were a teenager and they sent you to find and kill dangerous criminals that the police and government wouldn’t touch. He purposely cultivated your friendship to use you. He’s so sure he has you wrapped around his thumb that he doesn’t believe you’re capable of deceiving him. Of even wanting to deceive him. And he’s also sure that even if you do catch him in his lies, you trust him so much that you’ll believe him when he explains his lies away,” Phae explains. “That’s how my uncle operates. By gaining your trust so implicitly that he can betray you while you’re watching and you wouldn’t do anything.”

I thought I’d gotten past the initial uncontrollable rage at all the Pray had taken from me so that he could have the perfect enforcer. The perfect killer. But Phae’s words renew that rage. Renew the desire to go right up to Pray’s home and kill him, even though I likely wouldn’t survive it. Even though it would ruin this entire revenge plot we’ve been working so hard to pull off.

But that would be what he expects. That would play right into what Pray thinks of me. Someone he can easily deceive and manipulate and who can’t turn that manipulation back against him. So for now, the best thing to do is continue using that as a weakness against him. Right now, the children.

“So let’s assume the worst then. Let’s assume that Pray knows about the children. How do we arrange them to meet Phae while taking the least amount of risk?”

“No,” Dele says. “The question is, do we?” Then she looks right at Phae and says, “Pray may know they’re alive, but what I can assure you is that right now they’re safe. Somewhere Pray doesn’t know where they’re at and even if he did where he’d have to tread very carefully to get to them or piss a lot of people off who are already pissed off at him. It’s not forever. Just for now. Just until we figure something out.”

Dele’s right. But she’s also bullshitting. Because all of that is just a bunch of words to hide the fact that she doesn’t want to bring the children to meet Phae. But that’s something to call Dele out on later.

Phae looks at Dele, opens her mouth to say something, glances quickly at me, and then looks at Dele again and shakes her head again.

“That’s fine. I understand.”

“Good,” Dele says standing from the table and leaving her coffee behind. “I have to make some calls. Find me if you need anything.”

She leaves the room.

When she does, I turn to Phae and say, “I’ll talk to her.”

“No. No. I get it. I get it. Just… let me handle this.”

“Woman to woman?”

“No,” Phae says. “Mother to mother.”

“How…?”

“It wasn’t that hard to figure out. What else would she be to them when she ran off with them and has raised them for all these years.”

I suppose that’s a good point. But as Phae walks off to find Dele, it also makes me wonder just what else Phae has figured out. And, if she hasn’t figured it out yet, when she will.

“That’s going to be a problem,” I mutter to myself.

6

Dele

“Dele.”

I sigh when I hear Phae’s voice and the knock of her hand on my open door. When I told her to find me if she needed anything, I hadn’t actually expected her to come find me. I went to do work to get away from her. To be with my own thoughts. To process what her being alive means in a way I didn’t get to in such close proximity to her the last few days. And now, she’s invaded that.

I don’t say that to her. But I’m also not particularly nice when I ask, “Need anything?”

“Nothing. Just wanted to talk.”

“About what?”

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