Page 66 of The Hard Hitter

As things go from bad to worse, his throat works as he swallows, and the muscles along his jaw are so taut I swear they’re going to snap.

“Zander—” I begin.

“What the fuck, Sam.” The confusion, the hurt in his eyes, cuts like a dagger to my gut. He grips the doorjamb, and holds it tight as he take a few deep breaths.

I give him a moment to pull himself together—heck, I need a moment too—and then I hold the stick out. “I’m…pregnant.”

“Yeah, I can see that.” His head lifts, and the volatile storm washing black into blue hits like a punch to the jaw. I falter backward, reach behind me and grab the sink. “Is it mine?” he asks, this time his tone is cold, hard…angry. His words, and the harsh delivery, slice through me, leave me scraped raw and bleeding.

“Yes,” I answer softly. “It’s yours. I haven’t been with anyone else. You know that, Zander.”

He scoffs, like he doesn’t believe me, and there is a part of me that can understand why. He’d been tricked and trapped before, but I’m not like those other women, would never do that to him. After everything, does he not realize that about me?

He shakes his head, and his nostrils flare. “You sure about that?”

No longer able to hold back the tears, they fall freely down my face, and when my legs give, I sink to the floor. “I didn’t mean to get pregnant. I swear.”

“Were you really on the pill?”

I press my hands to my face, hardly able to believe the things he’s saying to me. This man knows me, the same way I know him. Does he really think I’m the kind of girl who would do this, whether to trap him or to give myself the baby I want? Does he think I’d use him like that? Does he think so little of me?

Apparently, he must.

“Were you?”

“Yes, I was…still am,” I shoot back, anger moving though me. “It’s not one hundred percent, you know. Sometime women can still get pregnant.”

“What did your neighbor Katrina mean when she said she knew you well enough? Was she trying to warn me about what kind of woman you really are?”

I understand where his anger is coming from. I truly do, but he has to start believing in other people, and stop letting the past ruin his future. “I can’t believe you’re asking me that. Katrina is a mean girl, Zander. She clearly wanted you, and was just looking to fill you with doubt about me. It obviously worked.”

“I don’t know what to believe anymore. Things…the past. I’ve been fucked over before.” He tosses the paper in his hand to the floor sucks in a fast breath and asks, “Were you just going to move, take the baby with you? I won’t let you do that, Sam. If the baby is mine, I’ll fight for my rights.”

“No, it’s not like that, Zander!” I say, things completely fucked up between us now.

“Then what is it like?”

“I…I…” I try to force the words out, but I can’t talk. “I…y-you…w-we…”

I pound the floor as my emotions get the best of me and my stutter comes back full force. I try again, fight for my words, but it’s no use.

“Right, okay then. You can’t even tell me what it’s like, can’t even come up with a good lie. How about when you figure it out, you let me know,” he says.

Turning, his boots stomp hard on the floor as he walks down the hall, and he slams the door behind him with so much force, it vibrates right through me…lets me know, whatever we had, we’re never getting back.

20

Zander

It’s been two days since I found out Sam was pregnant with my child, and possibly moving to another state. Christ, the moment I read that letter, it felt like my guts had been fillets with a dull butter knife. All the betrayal I’d ever felt came back and stole the air from my lungs, shattering the trust that had been growing between us.

I glance in my rearview mirror, and the sight of Daisy makes my heart pound harder. She’s going to have a sibling. I’m still trying to wrap my brain around this insane turn of events. But isn’t having a family with Sam something I had been thinking about? I hadn’t been sure where she stood, and I had wanted to talk to her, to see if we could perhaps take our relationship to the next level.

But then I saw the letter. Talk about a kick to the teeth.

Then, if that wasn’t enough, that positive pregnancy stick just about did me in. I may have wanted Sam in my life, wanted to make a family with her, but to think she went and got pregnant without even consulting me, well…that’s some fucked-up shit.

She’s not like that.

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