Angry fire lights his eyes. “Jesus, Nina, who have you been talking to?”
“I always thought Mom and Dad set it up after my concussion. They never alluded to the fact that it was you. How come you never told me?”
“Doesn’t matter,” he says, throwing my words back at me. “But it’s yours, and I want you to use it for anything you need.”
Okay, I’ll give him that. He has his own reasons, and he’s not about to share. “You’ve always been watching out for me, haven’t you?”
“Where is this all coming from?” he asks, instead of answering my question, and in that instant, I realize my brother and I have very different ways of showing love.
“I miss you so much, Cason. When you’re away…I just really miss being close. You’re my family. I think that’s why I hate hockey so much.” Cole was right about that. In fact, he seemed to know a lot about me, more than I ever realized.
I hear his throat work as he swallows. “Nina, I miss you too. I hate being on the road all the time, but it’s my job. I wish you could come. Wish we could hang out more.”
“Really? You mean that?” My mind races with all the hockey stories I could tell if I actually went on the road and shadowed Cason. I mean, what’s really keeping me here in Seattle? I love Jess, but we’d never lose touch, and I’d be home at the end of every season.
Then again, seeing Cole on a daily basis just might kill me.
“Of course I do.”
My throat tightens. I had no idea how much Cason really cared about me. He’s just unable to display affection the way I’d like to receive it—Mom and Dad couldn’t either, but I knew deep down they cared.
“One more question. When we were kids, did you like me tagging along on your hikes, your concerts, and everything else?”
He goes quiet for a long time, his brow furrowed like he’s fighting an internal battle. “Yeah, Nina. I did. I’m your brother, and growing up, we only had each other, right? Still do.”
So Cole was right about everything.
“You have Cole, and he has you.” I nod, and tears burn behind my eyes. “I want us to be closer, like he is with his sister.”
He slowly eases back into his seat. “What does Cole have to do with all this?”
“He’s been helping me. My editor asked me to write a hockey series, and since he was home with a concussion, he’s been giving me lessons.” I decided not to tell him about the sex lessons. There are some things a brother never needs to know.
The muscle along his jaw ripples. “He never mentioned it.”
“Oh, I thought he texted you about it.”
“No,” he says, looking like he’s about to hunt Cole down and kill him. Surely, he wouldn’t punch his best friend?
You’re worth the fight.
“Is there something you want to tell me, Nina?”
“No. Well, maybe just that I can take care of myself, you don’t need to go around intimidating people. I’m a grown woman, in case you didn’t know.”
“Doesn’t matter. Any guy who wants to date you has to go through me first.”
“Cason…” I begin, but then Cole’s words once again ping around inside my brain.
People show love in different ways.
I blink once, twice, as understanding dawns in small increments. I gasp and stiffen in my seat. Oh. My. God. Tabby asked me if I really knew Cole, and at the time, my answer was no. But is that true? When Cole wasn’t in The Playmaker mode, I saw many sides to him—kindness, compassion, a man who paid his father’s medical bills even after all the abuse. He didn’t want me to see that side of him. Didn’t want anyone to.
Why?
He’s not who the world thinks he is.
My mind races, sorts things through as I go over everything, from our very first trip to the grocery store to the last night we’d made love. Did he leave because he doesn’t think I’d like the guy kept hidden by The Playmaker?