Page 267 of Heartache Duet

“So what?”

“Your jaw’s all tense, and your face is red, and your fists are all punchy.” I slide the knife away from him. “And a little stabby.”

He chuckles under his breath. “I just don’t like the guy, Ava.”

“So you’ve said.”

Connor stays silent.

I sigh. “You know, secrets ruined us before, Connor, and I’m not saying that you and I are an us, but I’d like to… I don’t know… be friends?”

He laughs once. Bitter. “You want the truth?”

I nod.

Eyes set on mine, intense, he says, “I don’t want to be friends with you, Ava. I told you that once, and nothing has changed.”

I drop my gaze, my hand floating to my stomach to settle the butterflies there.

He clears his throat. “You know, Peter paid Mitch to do all that shit to your house. The paintballs and the BB gun and… all of it, Ava… it was all Peter.”

I gasp, shocked, my chest burning with anger. “That motherfucker!” I exclaim, shaking my head. “Good thing Trevor beat the shit out of him.”

Connor’s face lights up. “What?”

With a nod, I throw it all out there: “For a while, he’d been offering to”—I air quote—“take care of me.”

An indescribable sound leaves Connor’s lips.

I add, “I don’t know when he started looking at me differently, but he did, and it’s the reason I held off on taking him up on his offer. He’d given me a check a long time ago, enough to put my mom in care full-time, but I never accepted until… I mean, I always knew that I’d be indebted to him if I took it… in more ways than financially, but I was desperate, Connor.”

He takes a moment, his breaths shaky. Then he looks down at his hands, his voice as broken as his demeanor when he asks, “You slept with him?”

“No,” I breathe out. My head tilts back, eyes to the ceiling to stop the tears from falling. “I stayed with him, and after a couple of weeks, he crept into my bed one night while I was sleeping and—”

“Ava,” he cuts in, pained. “I don’t know that I can hear this.”

“I was prepared, though,” I rush out. “So… I kind of slept with a taser. Got him right in the dick.”

His entire everything changes instantly. “No, you didn’t,” he almost shouts, his laughter music to my ears.

I nod. “I did. And then I left right away and ran to Amy. I told her all about it, and Amy told Trevor and… well, let’s just say it took Peter a while to be able to breathe through his nose again.”

“Damn,” he says through a chuckle.

“Honestly, though, I feel bad,” I admit, getting more comfortable in his presence. “He was a genuine friend to Trevor for a long time, even if he saw me as… whatever.”

“A genuine friend wouldn’t do what he did, Ava,” he says, sitting taller.

I grab a glass and fill it with water, then slide it across the counter to him. “Yeah, I know, but there’s still guilt there, and I’m trying to work through it all. It’s just one of the many things I’m working through.” I watch, transfixed, as his Adam’s apple slides against his throat when he downs the water. Then I swallow, push away the thoughts flooding through my mind: I could lick him there.

He lowers the glass, his eyes on my lips, and I blink. Hard. Come back to reality. I say, my words rushed so he doesn’t have a chance to speak, “The program that Mom’s in—it’s pretty extensive in that they offer therapy for family members, too, so I go there once a week and—” he licks his lips “—and um…” I look away. “Yeah.”

“That’s good, Ava,” he says, his voice even. “I’m glad you have that support. You deserve it. Hell, you earned it.”

I rub my neck with the back of my fingers, feeling my racing pulse beating there. Then I inhale a huge breath, let it out in a whoosh. Over a year of holding everything in, and it’s time to let go. I’m sure of it. “Connor,” I say, but it comes out a whisper. I clear my throat, lift my chin, try to keep it all together. “A lot was going on when I um… when I left, I was in a pretty dark place…”

His eyes soften. “I know.”

---