Page 222 of Heartache Duet

“Just one form? Because no contraception is a hundred percent, and I know you love her, and you’d do anything for her—you’ve proven that—but having a baby in your immediate future…”

I suck in a breath, let his words replay in my mind. “I’ll talk to her about going on the pill or something.”

“Okay, good,” Dad says. “That was a lot easier than I’d prepared myself for.”

“Dad, Ava and I aren’t normal teenage kids. I’m sure a baby is the last thing she wants. She’s already taking care of her mom; adding that to her plate now would just—”

“Of course, yeah…”

“But don’t worry.” I pat his shoulder as I pass him. “You’ll be a grandpa soon enough.”

“Jesus, help me,” he mumbles.

I laugh under my breath as I close the front door behind me. The idea of a forever with her causes a stupid skip in my step as I make my way back. I enter her house, having left it unlocked, and go straight to her room. She’s sitting on the edge of the bed, her head lowered, her phone in her hand. She looks up when I enter, and my heart aches when I see the tears in her eyes. “What happened?”

She hands me her phone, and my heart drops. It’s not her phone. It’s mine. “Who’s Wendy?” she whispers.

My stomach twists, and my breaths halt. I look down at my phone, at the message there.

Wendy: Thank you for meeting me the other night. I really needed to see you.

“Connor?” Ava cries.

I look up at her, my eyes drifting shut, so I don’t have to see the pain in her expression. “She’s… no one.”

“Connor!” she whisper-yells.

My eyes snap open, and I regret it the moment I see her stand, her hand to her heart. She lets out a sob, and then another. “Who is she?”

Anger blazes through me, not at her. But at my mother. That she can ruin everything important to me while barely existing. Only she’s not here. Ava is. And so I take that anger and aim it at the only person in front of me. “Why are you going through my phone?”

“Get out!” Her fists hit my chest. “Get the fuck out!”

My heart burns, regret quick to consume me. “I’m sorry, Ava.” I grasp her elbows. “Please, I’m sorry.”

“Who is she?!” she cries

“I can’t tell you,” I rush out. She can’t know, and I’m not ready. “But, please, it’s not what it looks like; I swear to you. On everything we are and everything we have, I promise you.” My voice cracks. I don’t care that it does. I plead, my hands steepled in front of me. “You need to believe me, Ava. Please.”

Her nostrils flare, her tears flowing fast and free. “And you need to think about what you’re asking of me. Because you have a pretty sketchy fucking history of lying to me, especially when it comes to girls! Now get the fuck out, Connor!”

TWENTY-NINE

connor

I don’t sleep.

Can’t.

Everything inside me is broken.

I regret my initial reaction to Ava reading the text, but I don’t regret anything after. The possible legal consequences of her knowing the truth far outweigh the secret. And as much as I want her to be a part of what I’m going through, she can’t be. She can’t know.

I reach for my phone when the alarm goes off and pray I might have missed a message from her. But there’s nothing. The last text is from my mom, and all it does is shatter the already broken pieces of me. I type out a reply:

I hate you.

I delete it right away.

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