Page 51 of Pieces Of You

Holden playsthat same stupid song the entire drive to my work, occasionally chuckling to himself for reasons I’m sure only he and Dean know. I don’t ask. In fact, I don’t speak at all.

“I’ll pick you up at 11?” Holden asks, parking just outside the rear door of the diner.When I got out of the shower this morning, Dean was no longer there. I have no idea where he went, and Holden hasn’t mentioned him once.

“Yeah. Thanks.” I start to get out but his hand on my arm stops me.

“Kiss me,” he says, and it’s not an order, but it’s not really a request either. I fight back a smile and lean across the cab, kiss him on the cheek.

He rolls his eyes. “If I wanted a kiss like that, I’d go visit my grandma.” A retort stays trapped in my mind when his hand slides to my nape, fingers digging in as he pulls me toward him. His lips are already parted when they crash down on mine, and I lose my breath when he’s like this. When he needs as much as he wants, gives as much as he takes. He moans, the single sound echoing through my mind, my body. He chuckles as he pulls away. “Tonight,” he says, squeezing my thigh as he presses a single kiss to my forehead. And then he smiles that dirty, wicked smile of his. “The things I plan to do to you…”

* * *

Holden’salready waiting for me when my shift ends. Sitting on the bed of the truck, he looks up as I approach, but doesn’t move to get down. “Hey,” he says, and it’s too dark to make out his expression.

“Hey, I wasn’t sure if you’d be here,” I reply, gripping the straps of my backpack. “I tried calling.” He didn’t answer, obviously, but since I’m not really into waiting alone in dark alleys, I wanted to be sure.

“Yeah, sorry,” he says, and he’s still hasn’t moved. Eyes dropping to his lap, he adds, “I spent the day with Dean. I didn’t have my phone on me.”

“Oh,” I reply, stopping in front of him. And the more I watch him, the stronger that same feeling I had this morning courses through me. Something is different. Something isoff. “Everything okay?”

He looks up, eyes on mine, and I can instantly see the discomfort there. Theregret. “You know he was talking about you, right?”

“What?” I breathe out, standing taller.

“When we came into the house,” Holden says, “he said ‘I loved her man, and I fucked up…’” He pauses a beat. “He was talking about you, Jamie.”

Nerves prick at my flesh from the inside, and I can feel the tightening in my chest. Feel it harden. Feel the defensive walls rebuild there, brick by brick, piece by piece.

Holden clears his throat, his shoulders squaring when he says, “I’ve kind of been a dick to him ever since I found out what he did to you, and to be honest, I don’t like the way I’ve treated him.”

I take a slow step back, already knowing where he’s going with this. And to think that less than twenty-four hours ago I’d fallen asleepsmiling, actually excited for what the next day might bring.Foolish. “It’s fine, Holden. It’s not—”

“Dean’s my best friend here,” he cuts in.

“I know.”

“He’s myonlyfriend, really.”

I shake my head. I really don’t need to hear any more. “Holden, you don’t need to explain—”

“It’s just that… he’s never once judged me when it comes to the shit I’ve done with girls, and I think it’s only fair I do the same.” He says all this, his eyes right on mine, words rushed as if he justhadto throw them out there before he could take them all back.

After moments of silence, I raise my chin, push back the unexpected heartache and try to keep my voice steady when I tell him, “Honestly, it’s whatever.” And it was so stupid of me to think it was anything more.

I turn to leave, grimacing when I hear him jump down off the truck, his feet landing with a thud.

“Jamie!” he calls out. “I still want you to stay at my house.”

I stop in my tracks, give myself a moment to breathe.

To process.

To think.

And then I turn to the boy who only minutes earlier had me looking forward to this exact moment—being face-to-face with him. “Um…” I swallow the knot in my throat. “I called today because I got a hold of the maintenance guy. I gave him my sob story, and he went and turned everything back on, so… you really didn’t have to come here.”

“Oh.” Holden stares at me, his head tilted, trying to work out if I’m bullshitting. “Well, that’s good,” he says, nodding.

I nod back.

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