Page 27 of Rushed: Christopher

Like he needed to get something off his hands.

Something like me.

“Your medications are on the nightstand. The prescription for the pain meds is the one in the blue bottle. Dr. Kleinman said to take one every four to six hours as needed for pain.”

With that, Rush got up and began leaving the room.

Exactly like I wanted.

So then why did it hurt so fucking much?

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to tell anyone. Your friend won’t find out,” I called just as he reached the bedroom door.

Rush stopped, but he didn’t answer me, nor did he turn around. A strange sense of panic came over me, but it had nothing to do with my next statement.

“I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone in my family about any of this,” I managed to get out.

I instantly knew I’d gone too far when I saw Rush’s muscles go tight. When he slowly turned around and stalked toward me, I was scared.

Not that he’d physically hurt me because I knew in my heart he wasn’t capable of something like that. I was scared that I’d fucked up.

Really fucked up.

The mere fact that he hadn’t just continued out of the room was proof that I’d pushed him too far.

I managed to stand my ground, but that was mostly because with the nightstand just a couple of feet behind me, there wasn’t really anywhere to go.

Rush stopped several feet from me. His eyes weren’t cold and emotionless like I expected. They burned with anger.

Anger and something else.

Something I didn’t have the guts to give a name to.

“First off,” Rush began. “What and when you decide to tell your family is your business and yours alone. If you’d given me even half a chance, I would have proven to you that I was a man of my word. That goes for everything I said and did this morning too. If you wanted a pity fuck, that wasn’t it,” Rush snapped as he pointed at the bed. “I’m not saying I’m a saint, but I don’t fuck around with people’s heads to get what I want. And I sure as shit don’t expose my throat to them like that.” He again pointed at the bed.

Rush fell silent and half turned around like he was going to leave. He took his time turning around. This time, the anger was gone, and in its place was the emotion I hadn’t recognized before.

Hurt.

A whole hell of a lot of hurt.

“I can only assume by your comment about not telling my ‘friend’ that you’re under the misconception that I’m in a relationship with someone. Something else you would have eventually learned about me is that I don’t fuck around when I’m seeing someone.”

Rush turned and headed back toward the bedroom door. I pounced on the obvious lie he’d just uttered and said, “So I guess I just imagined what you said to me yesterday in the car about not having fallen in love yet but that all of that was about to change. Did I miss the part where you fell out of love and dumped your partner in the handful of hours that I was asleep? I’m not stupid, Rush.”

Rush paused. “No, no you’re not. You just can’t see the truth even when it’s right in front of you.”

Frustration consumed me along with a hefty dose of doubt as Rush reached for the doorknob.

“I don’t understand!” I practically shouted. “You said you were falling in love. I saw the way you smiled right before you said it. Why won’t you just admit it?”

“Admit what?” Rush shouted back as he turned around but this time, he didn’t move toward me. “That I’m the stupid one for falling for someone who will never trust me because some fucker from his past hurt him too badly? That I’m the idiot for losing my heart to someone who will never accept what’s standing right in front of him?” Rush paused and ran his fingers through his hair. “I was talking about you, Christopher! In that fucking car yesterday… I was talking about you.”

I shook my head in disbelief, but there wasn’t a chance of me speaking because my throat had closed up tight.

Rush let out a sigh and then took in a few deep breaths, apparently trying to calm himself. When he did speak, his voice was quieter but no less passionate.

“As much as I want to hide and lick my wounds, I’m not going to. Not if there’s even a scintilla of a chance of getting everything I’ve ever wanted. The only way you’re getting me out of your life is if you can honestly look me in the eye and tell me you don’t feel even a fraction of what I feel for you. I won’t take anything less than that, Christopher.”

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