Page 62 of The Wrong Track

“Go slow,” he called after me.

“We’re in here,” Hazel said and she stood up from the newly re-covered couch with the baby in her arms. I didn’t really see anyone else in the room as I reached for Ella and held her to me.

“She’s ok. We took good care of her,” Hazel told me. “I’m so glad that you’re home, though. I’m very happy to see you.”

“She’s ok,” Tobin told me, too. “She really is.”

“Thank you,” I said to the people sitting in the living room. “Thank you for helping both of us.”

“We were glad to,” Charlene answered. I was afraid to even look at her.

“We’re going to go,” I told them all, and I carried Ella down the hall and into the bedroom. I realized that I was crying all over the baby, getting her pink outfit wet.

“Everybody’s fine.” Tobin sat next to us on the mattress and put one arm over my shoulders and the other around Ella. “See? We’re all back together.”

But if something had happened to me, what would have happened to her? Would the child services people have tried to send her to Virginia to relatives who didn’t want to have anything to do with her?

“Remy, I’m afraid that if you keep crying like that, you’re going to have another attack. Can you try to rest? I’ll stay,” he said, and he helped me place Ella against the pillow where I could hold her but she could look around.

She was really fine, I told myself. This time, it had been fine. What if we had been in our apartment in New Mexico, though? What if I had died and left her, left her alone with no one to take care of her? And no one would have known that she needed help—

“What if I lie down, too?” Tobin asked. “Would that make you feel better?”

I didn’t know what would make any of this better but I was pretty sure that his presence was a great start. I nodded and he crawled behind me, careful of his boot, and put his arm over me to lay on mine, so that both of us held Ella. “I’ll stay awake. I’ll watch her,” he said. He bent and rested his forehead against my hair. “I’ll watch both of you.”

“Tobin? Is she sleeping with you?” his mom’s voice asked. I hadn’t thought twice before I’d walked into this room and placed myself on her son’s bed. My eyes were closed but I could hear her shock at seeing me here. I didn’t open them to see the disappointment and disgust on her face.

But being in this place with Tobin and Ella did feel better. Soon enough, we’d have to get up and face Charlene and the rest of the world again but for now, I wanted to hold on to it.

Chapter 13

“Remy!” Tobin stuck his head out of the bedroom. “Something really awful happened in this diaper. I mean, it’s terrifying.”

And he did look a lot like he might be sick.

“I’m coming,” I said, and shoved more paper in the printer. It took another minute to change and re-dress Ella, and then after we got into the car and down the block, we had to go back because we’d forgotten the birthday present (books, not a screaming chicken). So we were good and late by the time we were finally on our way to his cousin Alex’s house. And it took longer for the baby to settle down in her seat, even with Macbeth’s soliloquy from after he heard the witches’ prophecies and a play-by-play of the Woodsmen’s devastating loss last year to some team from Florida. She screamed her head off.

But finally, she did quiet and Tobin’s relieved eyes met mine in the rearview mirror. “Someday, we’ll get used to her crying,” he said. “But it’s not today. I think even my eyelids sweat when she goes off like that.”

“She knocked herself out,” I said softly. “But are we almost there? I’m afraid she’ll wake up.”

Tobin drove faster. His cousin Alex lived with his family out in the country somewhere in a farmhouse that they’d redone and I really wanted to see it because Annie had said it was beautiful. I was less excited to see everyone in Tobin’s family, although he kept telling me how much they wanted meet me and the baby. His aunt Evelyn had heard his mother announce that I had a drug addiction and probably the rest of his family believed that. Probably most of them had done a quick search of my name and maybe they’d even seen my mugshots.

“Will you try to stay near me?” I asked. “In case Ella needs you, I mean.”

Tobin looked at me in the rearview mirror and nodded. “It’s going to be fun. Don’t worry.”

I reminded myself that I needed the help of a few people and I could find them at this party, so I was glad to go. I needed them to be witnesses. I’d visited the library earlier in the week and after checking around to make sure that everything was ok, I’d asked Beth Ellen at the circulation desk if she could help me with a project.

“Sure, I’ll be happy to,” she’d said, smiling. “I haven’t seen you in a while.” She smiled more at Ella in the carrier on my chest. “Who is this little girl?”

She hadn’t been at all surprised to see me with a baby. “Did you know that I was pregnant?” I’d asked, and she’d nodded.

“I wanted to talk to you about it and I started a few times but…” She’d shrugged. “I got the feeling that you didn’t want anyone to pry.”

I’d introduced her to Ella and then Beth Ellen had helped me find the information I needed. Now I glanced down at the baby and decided to broach the subject with Tobin as we rode in the car, since it was pretty important for him to know. It had the potential to change his life, after all.

“Do you remember how I was in the hospital?”

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