Page 77 of Tarnished Queen

“That’s a popular feeling today.” I drag a hand down my face. “Where did you even get his number?”

“I found his business card in your pocket.” She pats her leg and I realize she’s wearing my jeans.

So much for us not acting like sisters. Ever since she realized we wear the same size, half my clothes end up in her room.

“What did he say?”

Elise crosses her arms. “It’s private. Father-daughter stuff.”

For the second time today, the green envy monster inside of me roars. But this jealousy is different than thinking Nikolai might be attracted to Bridget. This one is primal and fierce.

Howard Schaffner will not steal my baby sister from me.

“As long as I’m taking care of you, nothing is private,” I hiss. “We don’t know that man, Elise. If you want to see him or speak to him, you’ll talk to me about it first.”

“That’s not fair!”

“It doesn’t need to be fair. It needs to be safe.”

“Why not just lock me up then?” she yells. “If I can’t be trusted to think for myself, you might as well not let me outside. Chain me up like a dog.”

I roll my eyes. “Don’t be dramatic. You didn’t even know this man existed yesterday, so having supervised calls with him won’t be the end of the world.”

Elise’s face flushes red. Her lips pucker as anger builds behind them. I can practically see the words gathering at the end of her tongue, ready to let loose.

Then, all at once, tears roll down her cheeks. “You’re such a bitch, Belle.”

And she’s gone.

The moment I’m alone, everything crashes down on me at once. I stumble back against the kitchen counter, overwhelmed by the weight of it. I grip the cold granite for stability.

“She hates me,” I murmur.

I’m not handling anything right. I don’t know how to take care of Elise. I can’t be her sister or her mom or whatever weird mix of the two I was trying to be. I don’t even know what I am to her anymore. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.

And now, I’m about to be an actual mom to another human.

I press a hand to my stomach. A whimper forces its way out of my lungs.

Suddenly, it’s hard to breathe. I try to inhale, but my lungs don’t expand. The panic is an iron band around my chest that I can’t release.

How am I going to raise a baby and take care of Elise? How am I going to prove to Nikolai’s men that I’m trustworthy? How am I going to prove to Nikolai that I’m not a distraction? How, how, how—

“Belle?”

The sound of his voice forces my eyes up. Nikolai is standing in the doorway, silhouetted by the light from behind.

“I can’t—I can’t do this,” I croak. “I’m pregnant. And Elise… And the Greeks and loyalty and… Any of this. I’m fucking everything up and—”

His arms are around me before I realize he has even crossed the room. His lips brush across my ear. “Breathe, Belle. In and out.”

For some reason, my body listens to Nikolai. The tension in my chest eases enough for me to take a full breath. Then I force it out between tight lips.

“What happened?” His strong hands caress my arms, massaging feeling back into my limbs.

I shake my head. I can’t get the words out. But it doesn’t matter now anyway.

Nikolai is here.

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