Page 144 of Tarnished Queen

And when that body hits the floor, Elise is left standing there, completely unharmed.

I only realize I’ve closed my eyes when Elise’s voice breaks through the devastating silence. “Dad?”

Then I wrench them open and see Howard crumbled on the ground.

Elise is kneeling at his side. “Dad?” she says again in a tremulous voice that makes my heart break.

A crimson stain spreads across his chest. Elise presses her palms against the wound to staunch the flow, but it seems to just bubble out of him even faster.

“Help him!” Elise cries out. “Please. Help!”

I want to run to her, but there’s nothing I can do. Nothing anyone can do while Xena is still alive.

“There are other ways to hurt Belle,” Xena says, looking past me to Nikolai. “And when I hurt her, I hurt you.”

She’s talking past me like I’m not even here. Xena just shot at my sister, hitting Howard instead, but it was all to hurt me. And she only wants to hurt me so she can hurt Nikolai. It’s convoluted and it’s messy and, ultimately, it’s all for nothing.

“He doesn’t care about me!” All of the emotions I’ve tried to bottle up are finally bursting out. “Nikolai doesn’t even love me. You’re punishing everyone for a lie you made up in your head. He didn’t love me. He didn’t love you. All of this is for nothing. Don’t you understand that?”

Xena’s lips are pulled back from her teeth, making her look like some kind of feral animal.

“You wanted Nikolai to marry you,” I continue in a ragged pant. “You are hurt that he chose me instead.”

“I wanted Nikolai to give me control of his Bratva,” she corrects, tipping her head to the side like she can’t understand how I could have ever been confused. “And I’m not hurt that he chose you—I’m merely puzzled. Who would want you when they could have me?”

“Anyone with eyes,” Nikolai snarls.

Xena can say what she wants about not carrying that Nikolai doesn’t want her, but I am close enough to see the anger flash through her. Her nostrils flare. She doesn’t even look human anymore.

She is vengeance incarnate.

I can hear Elise weeping over Howard behind me, but I can’t focus on that because Xena is zeroed in on Nikolai. I know this isn’t going to end well.

All of the pain and suffering—it will continue. This feud between them won’t end until we’re all dead or until Xena feels she’s gotten what she’s owed… whichever comes first.

As for me? I’d like to end this death train before it reaches my sister.

That’s all that’s left to care about.

“Kill me,” I say suddenly.

Xena blinks and looks back to me. “What?”

“Kill me,” I say again. “If revenge is what you want, then kill me. I’ll be punished for ruining your plans. And if Nikolai loves me the way you think he does, he’ll be tortured. Win-win.”

But I know better. I know Nikolai won’t be bothered. He can find another woman to fuck, and one day, maybe he’ll even find a woman to marry. Someone he actually loves.

The thought of that alone makes me wish Xena would press her gun to my temple and get it over with already.

“Let everyone else go,” I beg. “Take me instead. Kill me.”

Nikolai roars, “Don’t touch her!”

“Kill me,” I say softly, repeating the words like a mantra. “Kill me. Kill me.”

Xena looks from me to Nikolai and back again. Her finger shifts over the trigger. all the noise around me fades. Elise’s crying, Nikolai’s shouting, then it’s all gone, like someone turned the volume of the world down.

Everything goes quiet.