Page 82 of Nailed (Dad Bod Contracting 3)
“Does he realize the reason you let yourself get…” Audra trails off, hunting for a nice way to put it.
“Fat,” I finish for her. “Let’s not sugarcoat it, Audra—I was fat.”
Audra rolls a hand. “It was his fault, is my point. And you getting in shape so you look all sexy was because you finally found the motivation within yourself to take control of your life, which you’d lost because of him.”
I pat her hand. “Yes, Audra, you know that, and I know that, and anyone with any kind of sense whatsoever knows that, but no, Paul did not seem to know that.”
Ella, at the farthest end of the line of pedicures, pipes up. “Why did Ryder have to spend the night? Was it a sleepover? Papa says sleepovers are dumb because no one ever sleeps and someone always ends up wanting to go home early and they always suck donkey waffles.”
We all snicker, and I blush. “Ummm. It was a sleepover, yes.”
Nina, older and wiser, leans closer to her sister. “It’s a grown-up, thing, Ella. You’ll understand when you’re older.”
Ella sticks her tongue out. “Oh, like you understand any more than I do. You’re not a grown-up neither!”
“I’m more grown up than you are! Adults having a sleepover is where babies come from.”
Imogen coughs to cover her laughter, while the rest of us try to keep straight faces.
“But Papa told me babies come from the baby gnomes. He said they have a workshop at the South Pole, and that’s what Santa does the rest of the year when he’s not doing presents.”
Nina howls in laughter. “Papa just wasn’t ready to teach you about sex.”
Ella frowns. “I thought that sounded kinda dumb.” She glances at Nina. “What’s sex? Is it like kissing?”
“OKAY,” Nova says. “That’s about enough of this conversation. Nina, Ella, I think this is something you should talk to your dad about, later, alone.”
“Yeah, Ella,” Nina says.
Nova arches an eyebrow. “I mean you, too, actually.”
Nina rolls her eyes, but then pulls a cell phone out of her pocket. “Dad gave me a cell phone in case we needed him, and he put Netflix on it for us.”
“Can we watch She-Ra?” Ella says. “I love that show!”
Within a few minutes, the girls are huddled around the cell phone watching a show together.
“How did Ryder handle your ex showing up like that?” Nova asks, returning us to the conversation.
I grin. “Well, let’s just say that I discovered he has a protective side, and that I find it very, very attractive.”
Audra leans close, lowering her voice. “Men acting protective is equal parts annoying and sexy. Franco gets like that sometimes, and I’m never sure if I want to slap him or fuck him.”
I giggle. “Speak for yourself. I know I wanted one of those, and it wasn’t to slap him, I’ll tell you that much.”
“And?” Audra asks. “Did you?”
“My son was in the room, so no.” I wiggle my eyebrows. “I did later, though. Twice—once of which was in my bathtub.”
Audra covers her mouth to stifle a shriek. “Oh, you dirty girl! In the tub?”
I cackle and nod. “Super messy, though—water got everywhere, and it took us fifteen minutes and all my bath sheets to clean it up.”
“Worth it, though, I bet,” Audra says.
I blush, nodding. “Hell, yes! So worth it.” I sigh. “But, back to the point—after Paul finally left, Nate suggested we just move in with Ryder. And I was like, ha ha, no, but nice try. It’s a little soon and also, we can’t just invite ourselves to live with Ryder. And in the middle of this, Ryder’s like, well, actually, I’m on Nate’s side. Like, come live with me.”
Imogen reaches past Audra to grab my hand. “Were you totally freaked out?”
I shake my head. “I should have been, honestly, but I wasn’t, somehow. I mean, it’s super fast, but this whole thing with us has been fast, which is part of why it was so scary. But once I sort of just accepted that it’s real and it’s happening and there’s nothing I can do to stop it, it got easier to just go with it.”
Nova is frowning at me. “I mean, it’s not as crazy to me as if you were telling us you were gonna marry him, but it’s still crazy to move in together this soon.”
I shrug. “I know. But it just makes sense to me, somehow. I don’t know. This whole thing with Ryder went from zero to sixty pretty much instantly. To hear Ryder tell it, it was love at first sight for him, which was the whole reason he tried to stop talking to me.”
“Well, that does make a certain amount of sense,” Audra says. “If you meet someone and fall in insta-love, I can see how you may want to try to run from it. Love is scary as fuck.”
