Page 40 of Drilled (Dad Bod Contracting 2)
I groan, and wipe at my forehead with a bar napkin. “You need to wipe this bar down better, Eric,” I call. “It’s sticky.”
“It’s a dive bar. S’posed to be sticky.”
I laugh. “Can’t argue with that logic.” I sigh, taking a long drink of ice water before going back to my wine. “So. Looks like you’re moving up in the world in the breasticular region, too.”
She cackles, glancing down at her breasts and lifting them. “These puppies? Yeah, it was my thirty-sixth birthday gift to myself. After losing all the weight, my poor boobies had dwindled down to these horrible, ugly, flat, stupid little sacks of flab. So, I saved up and got some implants. Nothing crazy—this is about what they were before I had Nate and then gained all the weight after Paul and I split.”
“Well, they look damn good.”
She smiles. “Thanks.” Her eyebrow lifts. “So. What’s your deal?”
I let out a long, frustrated sigh. “Just a guy. We hooked up, there were feelings, I don’t do feelings and neither does he, so we went our separate ways, but I can’t get him out of my head and it’s messing with me hardcore. No big deal, I’m fine.”
“Why don’t you do feelings?” Laurel asks.
“Long, long, long story,” I say.
She nods, and sips at her drink. “Fair enough.” She nudges me with her shoulder. “You should try feelings sometime, though. I’ve heard they’re pretty great. Everyone’s doing it.”
I laugh, showing her the mascara-smeared napkin. “Yeah? What about this?”
She waves a hand. “Nothing’s free. You want happiness, you gotta go through some shit to get it. I was happy with Paul until that fell apart, and I was happy with Derek until he dumped me. Eventually I’ll find someone that sticks. Until then”— she shrugs—“there’ll be breakups, assholes, and more than a few nights alone with some Halo Top and my vibrator. It’s all part of the process.”
“How can you be so laissez-faire about it?” I ask.
She shrugs. “Because I’ve experienced enough of the entire cycle to know the good times are worth going through the breakups. Sex is awesome, and sex without feelings is pretty great too. Believe me—I’ve had my share of hookups both before and after Paul, Nate’s father. But sex with feelings? There’s nothing like it. The emotions, the connection, the belonging?” She shakes her head, sighing. “There’s nothing like it.”
“Even when it gets taken away?”
Laurel nods, holding my gaze. “Yep. After Paul, I went through a phase where I thought love was a sham and all men were scumbags, but that didn’t last long for me. Most people are, on the whole, decent. If you’re looking for it, you’ll find that most men are decent guys. Not perfect, and to find a really amazing one seems to require quite a search, in my experience, seeing as I haven’t found one myself yet. But are they all cheaters and liars and assholes? Nope. That’s too broad of a brush, I think. It’s also too easy to find what you’re looking for, if all you’re expecting to find are fuckboys and assholes.”
“Were you always this wise?” I asked.
She nods. “Yep.”
I laugh. “Oh, well, okay then.”
She laughs too. “It’s just that when you were my personal trainer, all of our conversations were focused on me and my health. We rarely talked about you.”
I stare into my wine—which is cheap and gives me a headache, another reason I don’t drink much. “Yeah, well, I rarely talk about me with anyone, even Imogen, my best friend of almost thirty years.”
“Daddy issues, intimacy issues, trust issues, or all of the above?”
I stare at her balefully. “Are you a nonprofit manager, or a shrink?”
She pats my arm. “Here, right now? Neither. Just your friend.”
“Oh.” I take a moment to think. “Probably all three.”
My phone rings at that moment, and I glance at it before answering—James Bod: Dad Bod Contracting.
“Sorry, I should take this,” I say to Laurel, who nods and checks her own phone. “Hello?”
“Hey, Audra. This is James.”
“So caller ID tells me,” I quip.
He snorts. “Don’t be a smart-ass. Reason I’m calling is to invite you to a little get-together I’m having this weekend. An impromptu, informal Dad Bod barbecue at my place.” He hesitates. “All the guys will be there, plus Imogen, obviously, and I think she’s bringing a friend of hers from work. If you want to bring a friend or two, the more the merrier. I’ll be making steaks and burgers and dogs, and I think everyone is planning on bringing a side or some drinks. It’ll be low-key and fun. Just wanted to give you the invite.”
I sigh. “Everyone will be there, huh?”
James’s growl is one indicating he has no patience with nonsense. “I know you and Franco had your issue, but you’re both adults. You can handle a party with mutual friends, can’t you?”
