Page 53 of Mafia Fire

She gets a dreamy smile on her face as she looks out the window. “I wouldn’t change a thing.”

“Icould use a change,” I say.

She stares at me a moment, contemplating my face. We sit in silence for a moment. Thank God the steward comes with the food. We spend a few easy moments snacking on delicacies from the wooden board that’s been placed on a tray between us.

“You know,” she speaks gently between dainty nibbles of a seeded cracker, “if you aren’t comfortable with our arrangement, you can tell me.”

“Why would I be uncomfortable? We made it clear. No strings attached. You know it’s my cardinal rule, never to date staff.” My tone comes out harsher than I mean it to.

“And my personal rule is never to date at all.” She plucks up a grape, popping it into her mouth. Her gaze is far away as she chews, thinking. “But for you to take me from a sex club to a place that sounds almost like a daycare, I can’t help but wonder if this trip is your way of telling me that you are not okay with our arrangement.”

She eyes me.

What do I say? I hate our arrangement?

That the thought of it makes my flesh go hot, my skin prickle? That I want to murder every amazing staff member of mine who has had the honor of touching her beautiful body? Men that I respect, have worked with for years? I want to wrap my hands around their throats and—

“Cannon? Did you hear what I said? Do you want the last grape?”

“No.” I look down at my fingers wrapped around the handle of my coffee mug so tightly my knuckles have turned white. I set the cup down on the tray. Time for a bold move on my part. “Why?” I say. “Why is it that you don’t want to ever commit to someone?”

“Because.” She stares out the window, lost in thought. When she turns back to me, the look in her eyes dashes every ounce of hope from my chest. “I don’t want to get hurt.”

“No one does,” I say, my throat tight. “Ten years ago, I lost someone very special to me. A woman named Catherine.” For the first time in a long time, speaking her name doesn’t cause me physical pain. I think of the beauty from my past and can’t quite remember her face, or the curves of her body. The vision of her is blurry, fuzzy, pushed further away since Kylie. “That was before I joined the family. I was broke, trying to make my way in the world. I’d misread her, thinking she wanted me, the prospect of our future together, but it turned out she only wanted what I could do for her, and she decided it wasn’t enough. She left me for a rich asshole, a yacht broker on the coast.”

“I’m sorry,” she says.

I continue my story, slightly awed by the fact that I’m sharing it in the first place. “Catherine broke my heart. I thought I could never go through that kind of pain again. I started having one-night stands, telling myself not to get too close.” Though now I know I didn’t want one-night stands. I was just with the wrong women. “Then, something changed.”

“What changed?” she asks.

There is no other time, this is the moment; if I let this go, I might lose my chance. Do I even have a chance? Does it even matter? What do I have to lose — she’s already told me there is no chance in hell this thing between us, what I want, what I have to have, will ever happen.

She asks again, her eyes searching mine for answers. “What changed?”

“I met you.” I lean forward, needing to kiss her. “You, Kylie, are what changed.”

I slip my hands through her hair and bring her to me, kissing her hard, and in the kiss, I take back my fire, my position of control, no longer willing to let her call the shots.

14

Kylie

His lips arehot against mine, his kiss growing more demanding with each movement of his tongue. I find myself melting into his kiss, but then remember that Emilia and Liam are just behind us.

My face is heated as I bring my hand to his chest, pushing him away from me. “Cannon. We’re not alone.”

His voice is hoarse. “I don’t care.” His fingers tangle in my hair, sending shivers down my spine as he pulls me closer, wanting another kiss.

“This isn’t a playroom at the club,” I say. “No one here wants to see us kiss.”

He looks over his shoulder, finding Charlie giving us a curious stare. Caught, she quickly looks away. He turns back to me. “You so sure about that? I think there’re a lot of Bachmans who would like to see us kiss.”

His words make the full reality of what he’s done settle in.

He’s taking me to his family’s place, the Hamlet, a secret town where everyone is in loving, committed relationships. He thinks this will change my mind. That seeing his happy, monogamous family members will make me want what they have.

It won’t work, though. I won’t risk my heart.

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