Page 61 of A Kiss Of Lies

Serena heard the heavy footsteps echoing in the corridor, coming yet closer to her room, and she knew Christian wouldn’t wait until morning. The time for running had long passed. Besides, she had faith that he would help her. He might despise her when he heard her tale, perhaps even hate her, but he’d not hand her over to the law.

She rose from her bed and donned a robe. Moving toward the banked fire, she scooped up more coal and stirred the embers. The room was like ice, or maybe guilt was simply making her feel cold.

She’d barely seated herself in the big wing chair when Christian entered and closed the door after him. No knock, no request; he simply entered.

It was, after all, his house.

As he moved across the floor toward where she sat, she could almost see steam coming off him. His contained rage was palpable.

She couldn’t make out his expression in the firelight, the only light in the room. She’d purposely kept the room in shadows. A pronouncement of guilt was easier in the dark.

She swallowed the putrid distaste of her pending confession. She didn’t wait for him to speak. “I’m Lady Serena Castleton, or I was. I became Mrs. Peter Dennett just under two years ago. Now I’m his widow. That, at least, is no lie. But Mrs. Cooper is a figment of my imagination.”

He moved to stand directly at her feet, towering over her chair. “Is that why you played your little games with me, by leading me on with the little scraps of passion you deemed to throw my way? Blaming Dennett’s mistreatment—Christ, please don’t tell me that was all a lie too?” Christian’s voice chilled the room, its echo cold and unfeeling.

“His mistreatment of me is no lie. It was worse than you could possibly imagine.” Serena reached out a hand and touched his arm. She felt him tense under her touch. He shook her off.

“I could never understand my father’s rages at my mother, but God help me, I’m just holding on to my composure. Violence is simmering just below the surface. Be careful. I won’t stand for any more lies.”

Serena didn’t flinch. She knew the man in front of her better than he knew himself. He would not hurt her. He was nothing like his father. He was hurt and angry. And he had every right to feel that way.

Without even looking at her, Christian lashed out verbally. “I should have known you weren’t what you seemed the day we met. The way in which you appeared to ignore my disfigurement as if it were inconsequential had me fooled, Serena. I thought I was immune to women’s falsehoods. I’ve seen many try to trick me. Those who wanted my fortune threw themselves at me while shuddering in revulsion at the thought of having to share my bed. But yet again, the fairer sex has brought me down as no man has ever done.” The glow from the fire threw light on Christian’s face. “You should have trusted me.”

Her heart melted at the pain in his voice. He was more hurt than angry. What had Lord Fullerton shared with him?

She licked her lips, wishing she had a large glass of whiskey to drink for courage.

“What I feel for you is real. I tried to resist you. How could I allow myself to become involved with you when I knew nothing could come of it? I tried so hard to ignore the burning passion you ignited in my blood, but heaven help me, I just wasn’t strong enough.” A sob escaped from deep within her chest. “Christian, look at me, please. You’ve got to believe me.”

“I don’t have to do anything where you are concerned, madam. Your betrayal taints every memory of our voyage.”

“How have I betrayed you? I haven’t betrayed you. I simply did not tell you the whole truth,” Serena cried.

“You didn’t trust me enough. You must have realized how I felt about you. Christ, I asked you to marry me.”

“I wanted to tell you, but that would make you an accessory to murder. I couldn’t do that to you.”

His eyes opened wide in horror. “Murder? Christ,who are you really?” He began to turn away from her.

Anger flared in Serena. She deserved a chance to be heard. She grabbed his arm. “Please, you’ve learned what Peter was like or else you would have simply thrown me out into the street. Will you listen to my side of the story before condemning me? I thought you, of all men, given your mother’s death, would not judge me without a fair hearing.”

He crossed his arms over his chest. “Go on. Tell me everything.” His tone sounded calm and reasonable. A spark of hope ignited in her soul.

“I don’t know where to start.”

He took the other chair by the fire and indicated she should resume her seat. “I find the beginning the best place.”

Serena pulled the robe tightly around her. If she was to strip her soul bare, she’d rather do to it without being naked to his gaze as well. She began her confession. “As with most distasteful tales, my story revolves around money—or rather, the lack of it.” She drew in a shuddering breath. “My father loves to gamble, and he got himself into some financial straits. Unbeknown to me, he owed a huge amount of money to Peter Dennett.”

Christian clenched his hands on his lap. “You were the settlement of the debt?” She nodded and looked away. He had to ask. “Why did you agree?”

Self-loathing coated her words. “Because I was young and stupid, and Father swore it would help the family, and Peter was the brother of a marquis, handsome and charming. I did not love him, but I thought my life would at least be content. It was unlikely I’d marry for love, anyway. The man I loved didn’t even know I existed.” She looked directly at Christian with a raised eyebrow.

“Me?” he asked. “You were in love with me? We’d never even been introduced.”

“Perhaps ‘love’ is too strong a word. Infatuated, actually. Remember the stories I told you about Lady Serena spying on you at her father’s ball?” His face suddenly turned a charming shade of red at the memory. She sighed. “It was silly infatuation. I know that now. What I feel for you now is—well, I can’t find the words. Love is deeper, more consuming, and less selfish. I was just a silly girl.”

She chewed her bottom lip. “No, I’m being too hard on myself. I wasn’t silly; rather, I was naive. I gave in to Father’s plan because I never knew men as evil as Peter Dennett existed in this world. Perhaps if women were not kept in the dark about such people and their perversions, I would not have been so easily fooled.”

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