Page 22 of A Kiss Of Lies

Making her way to the main cabin for dinner, Sarah swore she’d never quake in fear before a man ever again. She wouldn’t give any man the satisfaction.

Lily was already seated at the table, her brown hair brushed neatly, with a soft curl falling over her shoulder. Lily was giggling at something Christian had just said. The girl had been completely won over by her guardian. Each time he smiled at her, her light brown eyes twinkled like stars on a cloud-free night. A warm feeling flooded Sarah’s heart. She knew Lily would always have Christian as her protector.

No one had ever protected her.

Sarah didn’t notice that the Earl had stood up when she entered. He must think her silly, standing in the doorway with a dreamy look on her face. But when she raised her eyes to his face and saw the same warmth he’d shown Lily reflected back at her, pinpricks of pleasure needled her skin.

“Mrs. Cooper, you look lovely this evening. Doesn’t she, Lily?”

Lily nodded. “Mrs. Cooper’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” Her smile faltered and she moved to open the locket at her neck. “Except Mama, of course.”

Sarah bent down to study the image. “You look just like her.” She tapped her finger on Lily’s little nose. “You’ll be as beautiful as your mother when you’re older.”

Lily giggled. “I hope so. Then I can marry a man as perfect as Lord Markham. I’d ask him to wait for me to grow up, but I think he should marry you, because he’s lonely and you make him smile.”

Embarrassed silence cloaked the room. Sarah felt the sharpness of Christian’s gaze boring straight to the center of her being. Sparks of emotion washed over her, rousing dormant and unwanted sensations she’d thought she had buried under the pain of injuries inflicted by her husband’s hand.

Her face ablaze, Sarah took the chair Christian pulled out for her, avoiding his eyes. “Out of the mouths of babes,” he intoned softly in her ear as he bent down to push her chair in.

“That’s a lovely thought, Lily, but earls do not wed governesses. His Lordship requires a lady of equal standing in society.” She risked a glance at Christian, and his amusement at her words rankled. “You have a lot to learn, Lily, about the society you will be entering. You will be expected to behave in certain ways. There are rules that must be followed.”

Lily shrugged her shoulders. “That’s nonsense. Other ladies might not be as nice as you.” She looked at Christian. “You let me choose my governess, so why can’t I help you find a wife? Wouldn’t your wife become my mother of sorts?”

Christian laughed. “I suppose she would. Of course I will seek your opinion before making such a serious commitment, sweetheart.”

Lily leaned over and whispered, loud enough for Christian to hear, “See? Don’t worry. I want him to marry you. Leave it to me.”

Sarah’s face felt as if it were suspended over glowing coals. But Christian merely winked at her. Before she could reply to Lily’s ridiculous suggestion, Captain Weatherspoon arrived to take his seat.

After dinner, Sarah took Lily to her cabin to settle her down for the night. She read her a story and tucked her in. Sarah knew that returning to the main cabin was dangerous, as the captain had gone back up on deck, but her cabin was suffocatingly hot. When she arrived back at the main cabin, it was, as she’d expected, empty except for Christian.

He’d settled into the large wing chair by the open rear windows, his long legs stretched out before him, his trousers pulled tight across his muscled thighs. His cravat was pulled loose and she glimpsed the scars trailing down his neck into the folds of his shirt. He was massaging his right shoulder and his sensual mouth was taut. He was in pain.

She had to fight everything within her to stop herself from going to him and offering to ease his pain. She was not supposed to know how extensive his burns were.

She bit back her inquiry of concern and entered the main cabin. The gentle breeze coming through the large open windows made the room bearable. She crossed the floor to join him, stopping to pour herself a coffee on the way.

When she’d entered, he had sat up and pulled his cravat together with one hand.

“It’s only me, Christian. Your burns don’t offend me,” she uttered softly. “There is no need to hide them.”

“They tend to upset people, women in particular,” he answered gruffly.

She gave him a look that made it clear she was not like other women. “I have seen far worse.”

He turned to look at her with raised eyebrows.Stick to the truth,she thought again. “My husband’s holding was surrounded by tobacco plantations. Many of the owners treated their slaves no better than animals.”

“Did your husband own slaves?”

Suppressed images passed before her eyes, images she knew she would be unlikely to ever forget. She remembered the screams and the smell of infected flesh from the whippings. She felt the return of the constant stomach upset that she’d lived with for over twelve months. “Yes. That’s why I left as soon as he died. I could not stand the suffering.”

“I’m sorry to have brought up painful memories.”

She reached out and touched his shoulder. “You must have experienced terrible pain yourself. The strength to endure as you have . . . I admire you. I can’t imagine the courage and fortitude you would have needed to call on in order to survive.”

His eyes closed, shutting out any emotion. “It’s simple. I wanted to survive. I wanted a lot more for my life, for the Markham name. I still do. I wasn’t about to let the French destroy me.” He reached up and covered the hand she had left on his shoulder. “Look at you. You seem to be a survivor too. I can tell your past haunts you. It’s in your beautiful eyes—in the shadows that lie within them.”

She wanted to cry at his pity-filled observation. “My marriage was not at all what I would have wished for.”The understatement of the century.

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