Page 5 of Forever with Me

Silenced stretched between us and I regretted my callousness, but I just couldn’t get past my hatred for him.

“I’m sorry, that probably sounded callous and cruel.”

“No, I wasn’t thinking about that, I was thinking about that dorky friend he had that was always following him around. Do you remember that guy? Horrible acne, kind of heavy, super socially awkward? He got a boner every time you walked into a room?”

I stood in between the two rooms, shaking my head. “I don’t. I really don’t remember much of anything other than studying,” I laugh, but I’m still stumped.

“Hmm, anyway. Coke, grab me a Coke, please.”

“K,” was all I said as I walked into the kitchen.

“So, did you guys work out a game plan with the lawyers?” Alex yells to me.

“Yeah, I mean, they pretty much think the case will either be thrown out or be dropped, because apparently, it is only really being pushed because of Carter’s folks,” I yell back, rummaging through the fridge for snacks.

“Yuck! That makes me sick, as if they could bury their head anymore!”

“Right!” I nod, coming back into the room with a Coke and some grapes in hand. “I know they believe that he was ‘sick’ but he attacked me and I just can’t feel bad for him!”

Alex sits, staring at me shaking her head with a small smile.

“What?!” I ask, feeling self-conscious.

“Nothing, it’s just weird to be having this conversation, I mean like a year ago, you tried to off yourself, Mia. Now, though, you have had a cavalcade of effed up situations happen and you seem so strong, so solid. I’m just happy, impressed and really grateful to have you back, babe!”

I smile back at her, understanding exactly what she means. A year ago, I was broken, so broken and unable to see past my pain. Not really understanding why I felt so damn alone and fragile. I couldn’t have known it then, but I needed Cole like I need him now. I didn’t know I was missing a piece until I lost him, and the absence of that piece almost shattered my life. I am glad that I could crawl out of the abyss on my own, because I’m stronger for it. But needing Cole and wanting Cole are intertwined and equal.

“I’m happy to be back,” is all I can muster, feeling overwhelmed by the moment. Really, it’s the only truth that is needed. So many people stood by me and helped me put myself back together, but I know that I’ve never been more together than I am now.

“Welp, now thatthatis out of the way, I have Sunday errands to run. I would love to hang out all day, but it’s my only day off this week and I need to do a thousand things before I go back tomorrow.” With that, Alex stands and goes for her purse.

“Call me tomorrow. Maybe lunch later this week?”

“Totally!” She smiles and waves over her shoulder.

“Tell Foster we say ‘hello.’” Cole smiles as he passes her, Alex’s wave turns to the bird. I giggle. Turning back around to Cole, he’s gone. Well, I guess more work beckons.

We tried to pretend we were just hanging out at home for the afternoon, but we were both tense from being locked away in our tower, hiding from the flashing bulbs and reality. I couldn’t help but notice that Cole had been hidden away in his office for most of the day and while I didn’t have my interview until next week (or ever, now with all the publicity, I wouldn’t be surprised if they passed on me), I was starting to run out of windows to look out of. Fuck this, I needed to get out of this house. How hard could that be, right?

“Hey!” I said, popping my head into Cole’s office only to be greeted by a grumble. “Come on, let’s escape. You have to be running out of people to yell at and I’m crawling up the walls. Last time I watched Law and Order, criminals are only restricted from leaving the country. Let’s call Foster and sneak away!” I smile, knowing I’ve made the best proposal.

The crack of his palms on the desk makes me jump and my eyes grow wide.

“Jokes aren’t welcome. Why are you making light of this, of everything? What the fuck, Mia!”

Looking at him, I don’t even understand what the hell is happening. What could he be mad about? I’ve barely spoken to him since Alex left.

“What the hell, Cole, why are you yelling at me?”

“Forget it, sorry, whatever, just forget it.” Obviously, something is going on that he doesn’t want me to know, which just serves to light a serious fire under my bum.

“No, no, no. You started this shit with all the pounding and yelling. Don’t backtrack and act like nothing is going on. This is just as much my problem as it is yours and last time I checked,Cole Parker, there aren’t any secrets between us, so spill.” Boom. I cross my arms over my chest, narrowing my eyes at him.

Shaking his head, he rubs his chin that has a sexable amount of stubble. He levels his eyes at me, “Here’s some truth, Mia. When were you going to tell me you tried to kill yourself? Never? In the future? I mean, you would think that a truth of that size would be something I would know.”

Oh Jesus, realization dawns on me that we have never had that conversation and he must have heard Alex and I talking. I uncross my arms and walk over to where he’s sitting and straddle his waist.

“Cole,” I urge, putting my hands on the sides of his face. “Look at me, I’m fine. I guess it just didn’t come up because honestly I was just so caught up with how happy we are and I haven’t thought about that time in my life.”

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