Page 36 of Dangerous Desires

Just a little while longer,she told herself.Just wait a little longer and everything will be fine.

Her shift at work didn’t start for another couple of hours, Birgitta piled into the car and drove out of the forest. As she drove, she wondered what the hell she was doing. Malik was driving her out of her own home, and she waslettinghim. When had she become so soft when it came to men?

Not men,she reminded herself.I have no issue telling Kent exactly where his place is. But Malik? I can’t say a single word to him. I shrink in his presence, turning into a little mouse of a woman.

Birgitta continued her drive out of the forest but instead of heading to work, she made her way to Julia’s apartment. Families always stayed close to one another and Birgitta was glad of that. All she needed to do was go down a couple of different streets she’d be on Julia’s doorstep.

She didn’t know why she was going to Julia’s, but something in her gut told her to go. Julia had stormed out of the house after accusing Malik of shoving his hands down her pants. Birgitta had been so quick to defend him, she hadn’t bothered to see if her daughter was okay. She needed to remedy that.

It was clear to her, in the cold light of day, that she’d been wrong to immediately go on the offense. Even if she didn’t believe what Julia had said, she still needed to be there for her daughter. The feeling of heavy guilt wouldn’t lift from her shoulders and heart, even as she climbed the stairs up to Julia’s floor.

There was only one window in the long hallway, right at the very end. The rest of the room was illuminated by yellow lights, glowing fiercely in the dimness. As she knocked on the door, she held her breath, wondering if Julia was even going to bother opening the door. She always checked the peephole, making sure she wasn’t about to be robbed or sold something. Seeing her mother standing there probably wasn’t going to be pleasant for her, especially after last night.

“It’s you,” Julia said through the door.

Birgitta almost jumped back in fright. Her eyes snapped up to the peephole slightly above her head. She hadn’t even heard Julia come up to the door.

“Go away,” Julia said, sounding like a sulking child. “I don’t want to see you.”

What would she hate most?Birgitta wondered, trying to think of a way to get Julia to open the door.

“Let me in,” Birgitta said through the door.

She didn’t want to argue with her, it would only strain their relationship more. They’d never really been on good terms—they were opposites of each other, and more often than not it caused tension.

“I won’t,” Julia said sullenly. “Please, just leave.”

“I’m not leaving,” Birgitta sighed. “I’m going to stay here until you let me in.”

Birgitta was met with silence. She looked up to the peephole, trying to figure out why Julia was so set on not speaking to her. Was it because of the previous night, or had the camel’s back been broken? Had their relationship gone so downhill that there was no possible recovery?

“I’ll start making a scene,” Birgitta warned.

It was the only thing she could think of. Her daughter, as lovely as she was, was a typical Swede—she hated confrontation and would avoid it entirely. Not only that but drawing attention to herself was something she detested. Whenever something dramatic happened in public, Julia was the first to run away and disassociate herself with whoever was there.

Birgitta had always thought of it as cowardice, acting just like her pathetic father, but it was more than that. She’d been brought up in the Swedish culture and had soaked it up like a sponge. Birgitta hadn’t been able to live by the rules, she’d always desperately needed to be her own person and make her own way in the world. Julia had never had such a desire—she just wanted to live a normal, quiet life like the rest of the population.

The door finally opened a little and Julia’s head poked through the gap. “What do you want?”

“To talk to you,” Birgitta said gently. “To apologize.”

“Apologize?” Julia asked, her voice almost screeching.

She stood up straight and let go of the door. It opened slowly, revealing the one-room apartment behind her. The look of pure shock on her face was telling. Clearly, she thought her mother was incapable of apologizing.

“I was wrong to act that way,” Birgitta said. “I shouldn’t have assumed straight away that it didn’t happen.”

Julia shushed her, trying to drown out Brigitta’s words. Then she grabbed hold of her mother and dragged her inside, slamming the door shut behind her. The thought of someone coming down the hallway and overhearing the conversation must have been hell for Julia.

When Julia let go of her mother she took a couple of steps back and folded her arms across her chest. She spoke to her mother softly. “So you believe me?”

Birgitta sighed and looked away from her daughter. She didn’t want to get into this—she just wanted to apologize.

She let her eyes drift around the room. To the left side was the kitchen, covered in a white tile backsplash and clean, white appliances. Behind the kitchen was the bathroom, the only room walled away. On the far right side of the room was the sleeping area, complete with a double bed pushed up against the wall on one side.

Julia had put up curtains and painted the wall a soft pink color. It gave the room a nice sense of division. Just to the right of Birgitta was a small, cheap couch and an even smaller and cheaper TV. Books and papers were sprawled across the coffee table where Julia had clearly been studying.

“You don’t believe me,” Julia said, bringing Birgitta’s attention back to the conversation. “Why would you?”

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