Page 43 of Our Forbidden Romance 1

“Yes. She left an hour ago.” Shit! No!

I thank him and run back to my car calling Alana, her cell is on now, but it rings out, not only once but twice. Why isn’t she answering my call? I need to know she is okay. “Fuck!” I hiss, punching the steering wheel it hurt but right now I don’t care.

I rip the envelope open, taking the sheet of paper out and unfold it.

Ezra,

I will always be grateful for everything you have done for me. You are a good man, even if you won’t admit it. Things would have been a lot worse if it wasn’t for you, so thank you. I am happy we had the chance to meet, I just wish it was under different circumstances.

I hate goodbyes, but it is the right thing to do. We would never work out, not when we can’t be honest with each other, not when you are in a relationship. Who knows, maybe we will cross paths again one day, and things will be different. Perhaps we will get another chance.

The truth is my feelings for you were growing with every time I saw you, which made it harder to be around you. A part of me hoped that maybe you would have finally opened up to me, or would break things off with Bella, and I know I don’t have the right to say these things because you were never mine to begin with.

Be happy, Ezra! Find what makes you happy. Please don’t try to find me because us not being in each other’s lives is best for everyone.

Take care

Alana xx

No, this isn’t happening. I refuse to let it end here. Why didn’t she tell me how she felt? Probably for the same reason I didn’t tell her. I try calling her again, but no luck, only this time I choose to leave a voicemail for her.

“Alana, please don’t do this. I received your letter. I refuse to let it end here. We need to talk, and I promise to tell you everything you want to know. Call me, please, because I need to know you are okay.”

I sigh, ending the call. I’m sitting in my car staring at my screen. Resolution to not let her go has me calling her on and off for the next hour. I have never heard her mention family or friends, which makes me think she has no one in her life she can go to. She has no money either, so I don’t even want to imagine where she is, but the places I can think of aren't something I want for her.

LA is not the type of place Alana should be alone. Surely… She wouldn’t sleep on the street? She must have somewhere she can go? I don’t know, but I refuse to head home until I have heard from her or find her, even if it means I need to drive around the entire damn city. She is alone, vulnerable, and hurting, not a good combination to be in at the best of times, and since I am the cause of her disappearing, I won’t rest until I know she is safe.

* * *

I’ve been searching for Alana for the last five hours. I checked her old apartment and the bus station and drove around the streets, stopping by the places I know she likes, her favourite places to eat and drink. Christ, I even called her old asshole of a boss, but nothing. I even put calls into the hospitals too, just in case. I haven’t stopped trying to contact her, but nothing. I am worried out of my mind.

I don’t even know if she is still in LA, but I can’t think of where she could go with next to no money, and surely she has more sense than to hitchhike. The thought of her being out there alone, in the dark and the rain, because it is pouring down now, makes me feel sick to my stomach.

I am beyond exhausted and have been fighting tiredness by drinking plenty of coffee and red bull to make sure I stay awake. I decide to pull over for five minutes in order to pull myself together and return to my search in a bit. The streets are pretty empty, and it’s nearly two o’clock in the morning.

I turn my engine off, rest my head against my seat and pull on my hair in frustration. Letting a groan out I realise I need to take a few deep breaths to calm myself down. And then, something catches my eye. There is a bus stop in front of me, and I see a figure sitting on the bench. I can work out it is a woman, but the poor light and rain blocks my view. Could it be Alana?

I quickly undo my seatbelt, and trip over myself climbing out of my car in my haste to run over. The rain is pelting down, making visibility poor. I have my hand up to shield my eyes from the deluge of rain, but it’s no replacement for a good umbrella. The closer I get I realize it’s her. She is sitting on the bench, soaking wet with her bags on the ground in front of her. Her head is down with her arms wrapped around herself. She looks like the picture of defeat.

“Alana,” I call out. Her head shoots up, her eyes widen, and her mouth drops open when she realizes it is me. She grabs her things and tries to run off. I pick up my pace and easily catch up to her, then manoeuvre myself to get in front of her and block her path.

“Go away, Ezra,” she whimpers, trying to push by me.

I grab her arms, stopping her. “What the hell are you doing out at this time in the morning, and in the pouring rain? Are you trying to get sick?”

She finally looks up at me, and I have never seen someone look so sad and broken, except me when I was a kid. “How did you find me? Didn’t you get my letter to tell you not to?” She sobs.

“Yes, but I decided that wasn’t how things would end. As for how I found you, I have been looking for you for the last six hours and refusing to stop until I found you. Where did you plan on sleeping, Alana?” I ask concerned, pushing the wet hair away from her face.

“On the street somewhere. It wouldn’t be the first time.” She shrugs. Cocking her head to the side she asks, “Why have you wasted all night looking for me when I told you not to?”

She still hasn’t worked it out. “Why do you think, angel?”

“I have no fucking idea because you made it clear you were done with me. Why waste so much time?” She shakes her head, breaking eye contact with me.

I place a finger under her chin, tilting her head back to make her look at me. “Because the thought of you being out here all alone broke my heart, Alana. You still don’t see it, huh? Then again, I haven’t exactly been clear on how I feel about you.”

“How you feel about me? The last I heard you felt nothing, Ezra. I was nothing but someone for you to fuck,” she snaps.

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