Page 80 of Stay with Me

Was that why she’d made her presence known? Because she had no opposition? Clearly she’d guessed he would be coming today. Perhaps she had overheard Simon discussing the situation.

“How do you fare?” He scanned her but saw nothing amiss.

“I am untouched by the illness so far, and I am doing my best to provide relief to those who are afflicted.”

His mother was a good woman. Instead of running away or sequestering herself, she was putting herself at risk to bring comfort to those who were dying.

If everyone else was ill, then he would face no opposition in freeing Sybil. He had no doubt Simon had locked her away in the dungeon. But at least there she would remain safe from the plague. “Tell your servant to lift the gate. I have come for my wife.”

His mother met his gaze, and the sadness in her eyes tore at him. “I regret to inform you she succumbed to the plague earlier today.”

~ 31 ~

The entire world as well asevery function in Nicholas’s body came to a halt. He could only stare at his mother, unmoving, unblinking.

“I am sorry, Nicholas.” Her words, though gentle, hit against him with the force of hot tar and heavy rocks pouring from the gatehouse murder hole. He nearly buckled to his knees and had to grab the iron bars of the portcullis to hold himself upright.

“I tried to go down to visit her shortly after she arrived,” his mother said, “but Simon’s guards wouldn’t let me pass. And this morn, they brought news to Simon that she hadn’t made it through the night.”

Nicholas closed his eyes against the nightmare. Once again, he’d been too late to rescue the woman he loved. And now she was dead. How could he endure this again?

The ache in his chest radiated with such force he pressed a hand to his heart, not sure how he could live without her. He couldn’t...

This was Simon’s fault. If his brother hadn’t captured Sybil and exposed her to the plague, she would still be safe at Devil’s Bend.

Anger pumped through Nicholas’s blood. Simon was the worst of miscreants, and he deserved to die. Today. At this very moment.

Nicholas bunched his fists together and let bitterness burn through him. He would go into Simon’s chamber, stand above his bed, and look him in the eyes. Then he would plunge hisdagger through the man’s cold, evil heart. Simon deserved it. Worse. He deserved to be hanged, drawn, and quartered. Yes, Nicholas would do that to Simon this very day while he was still alive and could feel the pain.

Even as his entire body threatened to tremble and give way to consuming grief and rage, he lifted his head, and from the corner of his eye, caught sight of his archers waiting for him at the hedge, their bows and arrows still at the ready.

Many of them had faced death and grief just yesterday with Simon’s visit to Devil’s Bend. Yet here they were today, willingly helping him. If they could live with such courage, then he couldn’t give way to his grief... or to the rage.

Maybe in the short term, he would find release in torturing Simon. He would give his brother a taste of the pain he’d caused others. But once he’d made Simon suffer and die, Nicholas knew he wouldn’t experience any happiness or relief. Instead, he’d have to live with the regret of lowering himself to Simon’s level. His retaliation against the French had already taught him that.

Could he be different this time? Could he rise above his anger and need for revenge to walk away from Simon and allow God to judge him instead?

Pulling his shoulders back, Nicholas crossed the bridge and peered through the iron bars at his mother a dozen paces away. “I would like to retrieve my wife’s body and give her a proper burial.”

His mother shook her head sadly. “You cannot touch her. You must leave her be for now.”

“If you can touch those who are sick, then how can you prevent me from doing so?”

“This is different, Nicholas—”

“I cannot leave without my wife.”

“And I cannot let you put yourself at risk. You are my only son.”

“Please, Mother. I love her.” He didn’t care that his voice rang with anguish. As his mother met his gaze, he held nothing back. He let her see inside to the depths of the love he had for Sybil. Even though their marriage had been short, he’d shared with her something powerful and consuming.

His mother hesitated but then touched her pocket. Finally, she nodded to her servant still hunched in the shadows of the gatehouse. “Open the portcullis for Nicholas.”

The servant bowed his head and then shuffled toward the gatehouse tower stairway.

Nicholas motioned at the archers in a silent command to stand down. The young archer who’d taken the leadership in Ralph’s absence jogged toward Nicholas. While waiting for the gate to open, Nicholas filled him in on the news.

“You and all the men,” Nicholas said, “must return at once to Devil’s Bend and stay far from the plague.”

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