“How did he know that?”
“I think he heard it from his father, who heard it from his father. He was among the group of people who settled Endla, though he was just a child at the time.”
“I wish I could see that. Two swans, swimming together.” Leelo traced the curves of the swans’ necks with her finger. She’d only ever seen birds drown, thanks to the poison in the lake, but once upon a time, that hadn’t been the case. At least according to the stories. “Do you really believe the Forest made the lake poisonous to protect us?”
Fiona’s brow was furrowed, her mouth curved in a frown, but after a moment she swallowed down whatever she had been planning to say. “Your father always said that stories are like wood, bending and warping with the passage of time. But I believe there is some truth to the legend, yes.”
Leelo’s heart began to pound as she realized what she was going to ask her mother. “Mama—”
Fiona lifted the lid of the box before Leelo could finish. Inside was a little green velvet pillow, topped with two gold rings tied with a satin ribbon. “Your father’s and my wedding rings. I stopped wearing mine when he passed away. It felt wrong to wear it when his was no longer on his hand, and the thought of burying him with it was too painful. So I’ve kept them here, in this box, ever since.”
“Why are you showing me this?” Leelo asked.
“Because when the time comes, I want you and your partner to have them.”
Leelo’s eyes met her mother’s. They were the same color as Ketty’s and Sage’s, but the hazel was softer, more green than yellow, and there was none of the guile Leelo always saw in their gazes. “Mama, I don’t plan on marrying. Not yet, anyway.”
“I know. But someday. It’s clear to me you’re in love. I don’t know why you won’t tell me about them. I hope you know I would support you in whatever partner you chose.”
Leelo flushed at the shame of lying to her mother, who truly wanted what was best for her daughter. “I want to tell you about him. It’s just...”
Fiona lowered her voice. “You can trust me, darling. I won’t tell Ketty and Sage.”
“I know you wouldn’t. Not unless you felt like you had to. And I’m afraid when I tell you who it is, you’ll think you have to tell them.”
She took Leelo’s hand. “Why?”
“Because he’s not...” Saints, was she really going to do this? There would be no turning back from here. But she had crossed the point of no return a long time ago, the moment she pulled Jaren to shore.
“I know about Nigel,” Leelo blurted, then threw her hand over her mouth. She hadn’t meant to say it. She was going to tell her mother about Jaren.
Fiona gasped, her own hand flying up to cover her open mouth. “How?”
Above her fingers, Fiona’s eyes were wide and shining with tears. Leelo couldn’t tell if it was fear or shame, maybe both. This was a secret Fiona had spent all of Leelo’s life burying, and now Leelo was deliberately bringing it out into the light, where it sat between them as naked and vulnerable as a baby bird.
She hated doing this to her mother, but she needed her to know that she would love her no matter what secrets she kept. Just as she hoped her mother could still love her once she knew about Jaren.
“I found the cottage, and the book of poetry,” Leelo said, and before she knew it, everything was pouring out of her in a rush. “I won’t be angry, Mama. Just tell me the truth. Was Nigel Tate’s father?”
Fiona’s face had gone pale and shiny with sweat, as if she were about to be ill. “Leelo,” she breathed.
Leelo went down to her knees before her. She took her mother’s hands, trying not to notice how they were smaller than her own. “It won’t change the way I feel about you. Or him. He will always be my brother. But is that who you sent him to? Is Tate with his father?”
“Oh, child, this wasn’t how I wanted you to find out. It all happened so long ago.”
“Please, Mama. I need to know the truth.”
Fiona swallowed thickly and dabbed at her eyes with the edge of her sleeve. “I know. It’s...difficult.”
Leelo lowered her head to her mother’s lap. “It’s all right, Mama. I’m almost a grown woman. I can handle more than you think I can.”
“It’s not just that, love. It’s difficult for me to remember that time.” She began to comb her fingers through Leelo’s hair as she spoke, the way she had when Leelo was a child.
After a moment, Fiona inhaled deeply and released her breath in a slow stream that cooled Leelo’s cheek. “It was more than a decade ago, now. We had a harsh winter that year. The entire lake froze for the first time in living memory. It was so bitterly cold that the Watchers refused to stand their shifts after multiple people lost fingertips or toes to frostbite. But an outsider hunting a man-eating wolf that had been terrorizing a village crossed the ice, not realizing where he was in the snowstorm. He fell into a ravine and injured himself badly. He sent his dog away when he saw a figure approaching the next morning, assuming the person would kill them both.”
Leelo lifted her head a little. “It was you?”
Mama sighed. “It was. The outsider was nearly unconscious and half-frozen already. I considered leaving him to die. But when I got closer, I could see that he was a young man, only a little older than me. Then he opened his eyes and looked at me, really looked at me... I can’t explain it, but I couldn’t just abandon him, darling. I helped him out of the ravine, and we managed to get to a part of the island I thought no one would go, especially during such a brutal winter. At first, it was little more than a lean-to made from fallen boughs. But over the following weeks, I managed to pilfer supplies from your father’s workshop, and as Nigel healed, he built the little cottage.”