Page 21 of Allure

I figure we'll get a break after the three minutes, and then I'll try against Opal, the green belt, again, but no. Sensei mixes us up, and I'm with a male red belt, who tries to take it easy on me, talking me through what I should be doing, but he still ends up getting positions on me, so we have to restart and try again.

And then, Sensei Ivar has me with Declan.

“A little birdie told me that you want to be pushed more,” Declan says with a wicked glint in his light brown eyes. “Is that true?”

“I’m tired of crawling. Let me walk.”

“Then get up and walk.”

The timer dings for us to get started on this round, and I try against Declan. I really do, but he doesn’t hold back. Not this time, or if he does… that’s a terrifying thought because he wipes the mat with me. Seriously, at one point, I’m eating the mat.

I’m furious but also motivated.

I will become stronger.

No one will ever hurt me again.

I can do this.

At this point, I think I have to do this, or else I'm going to feel like a failure.

And I don’t fail. Not ever.

CHAPTER8

Ihead back to the dorm to find a note from Dawn that she and Kaylie and Eliza have gone out to buy some groceries. I’m not sure what all they plan on buying, considering the dining hall has more than enough options, but hey, whatever floats their boat.

Kaylie Sweeny and Eliza Rodriguez. They’re our suitemates. I haven’t spent a lot of time with them yet, but they seem cool. I do recall that Eliza is a bit hard of hearing in her left ear, and I’m pretty sure she’s the one who sings loudly and offkey in the shower. As for Kaylie, I know she owns the double-edge sword that’s hanging on one of their walls. I’m not sure that campus police would appreciate that being there, but it looks awesome. Is it just for show? I’m gonna have to ask her when they get back.

Since I have the room to myself, I opt to check out videos of fights. MMA fights, not wrestling. The announcers are a bit too over the top for me, and I feel like the camera angles are all wrong for me to actually see what the fighters are doing. Sometimes, I swear it just looks like the one is on top of the other, pinning them but without doing anything at all. How is that really a submission?

One move, though, is amazing. A guy is sitting down, grabs the other guy’s shorts, spins around, hooks his leg through somehow to make the standing guy fall down. Boom! But how in the world can you do that spinning part? Even on a mat, I just don’t think it would be that easy. Maybe it’s about momentum? Or tugging hard on the shorts? It might be easier to accomplish with karate pants.

I really love how amazing this move looks, so I climb down from my bunk and try to reenact the move on a phantom foe, but I really can't do the spin move at all, and I just feel awkward and like a turtle.

Ugh!

I rewatch that short clip over and over again. The announcers go out of their minds over it, but they don't mention what the move is called.

Growing more and more frustrated by the second, I do a search for karate moves, but so many pop up that I don’t know what to click on first. Worse, since I don’t know the name of that cool spinning move so it’s not as if I can try to watch a karate demonstration or breakdown of that particular move.

When I do find some moves that I think I might actually be able to do, it’s more than a little aggravating because I have no one to try them on. Karate is about doing. You have to learn through doing, through repetition. That’s why we have to do so many punching and kicking drills. Through repetition, there is power.

I know that I’m being a little unreasonable. I want to jump ahead to the cool stuff, and I only just started. If I can only do punches and kicks and grappling positions, I’m going to get bored, and if I get bored, I might become tempted to quit.

And prove Declan right? No fucking way.

My eyes are starting to water by the time Dawn, Kaylie, and Eliza burst into the room. They’re talking and laughing, and they all smile at me.

“Hey, roomie!” Dawn says cheerfully. She holds up a few bags. “I got some stuff to make cookies, but I’m going to have to wait until tomorrow to make them.”

“You’re going to make cookies?” I ask, jumping down from the top bunk.

Dawn grins. “I befriended one of the cooks at the dining hall earlier today. I told him about how I miss baking already, and he said students aren’t allowed to, but maybe if I intern for him, he can look the other way…”

“Oh, that’s sweet!” I grin.

“Yeah, you know me and my sweet tooth.” Dawn giggles.

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