Page 105 of A Love Like That

“I know,” I said, smoothing my hands over her ass.

“Not just about my comment but about…not being there when you guys needed me.”

I took a deep breath and peered up at the sky. “There was nothing you—or anyone—could’ve done. Not even a team of highly qualified medical professionals could save her.”

She settled into my arms. “I’m a good listener,” she said. “If you ever want to talk about it.”

I couldn’t do that to Elle. It was my burden. My decision.

I also secretly feared that she’d look at me differently if she discovered the truth. Would she have sided with Gloria? Would she have fought to keep Tessa on life support, despite her wishes to the contrary? It was so much easier to judge the situation after the fact.

“Thanks,” I said, and I meant it. I might not intend to take her up on that offer, but I appreciated it more than she could know.

I held Elle close and peered at the sky, an endless blanket of stars. I kept telling myself life was too short, but when it came down to it, I was scared. Scared of letting someone in, only to lose them again.

TWENTY-FIVE

“Ellie.” Maddox tapped on my shoulder. “Will you come play with me?”

“I’ll be there in a minute,” I said, my attention focused on the computer screen.

Tristan and I had returned from the cabin earlier in the week, and since then, life had been busy. The kids weren’t in camp this week, and I was leaving for Japan in three days.

As much as I’d rather spend time with Maddox and Savannah, I had to finish some paperwork for the JET Program. I’d waited until the last minute, procrastinating so it would seem less real. As if that would somehow make my departure less imminent.

All along, I’d known it was coming. But I’d wanted to soak up every second with Tristan and the kids that I could.

“Please?” Maddox begged, his pleas tugging on my guilt.

“I have to finish this, baby. Otherwise, I won’t be able to go to Japan. As soon as I’m done, I’ll come play. Promise.”

His shoulders sagged, and he shuffled out of the room. I felt bad, but this really couldn’t wait.

As soon as he was gone, I slumped forward, resting my arms on the desk and cradling my head in my hands. I kept telling myself this was what I wanted. But all I really wanted was to stay with Tristan. To spend more time with him and the kids.

But that wasn’t an option. And the sooner I finished this, the sooner I could enjoy what little remained of our time together.

I lost track of time, eventually completing the paperwork and shutting my computer with a sigh. I stood and headed downstairs as if in a daze. I needed something to eat; maybe the kids did too.

“Maddox? Savannah? You guys want a snack?”

No one responded, and I frowned at how quiet it was. I went back upstairs and checked their room, but it was empty.

“If you’re hiding—” I called after I’d checked everywhere I could think of upstairs “—I give up.”

Silence.

My pulse started rising, even as I told myself to stay calm. They couldn’t have gone far. This was probably all just a game to them.

I checked the downstairs. Under the cabinets. In every hiding space I could think of, calling their names all the while. But there was no sign of them, and no sign of Rex either.

Exasperated and sweating, I wiped a hand across my forehead. I huffed out a breath and gave up my search, figuring they were out back.

Please be out back. Please be out back.

But when I glanced through the kitchen window, I didn’t see them. I opened the door and called out, but Rex didn’t come bounding up to me. And Maddox and Savannah were nowhere to be seen.

Okay. Don’t panic.Maybe they went out front.