Page 37 of A Baby Scandal in Italy

Ivy wondered if Rafa was worried about her. Another half an hour ticked by and her anger turned to despair. She wished she had told him how she felt about him. The road accident that had resulted in the traffic jam emphasised that life and love could not be taken for granted. Rafa had been badly hurt in the past, and he deserved to know that she loved him, and that she would love his baby who was part of him. She was desperate to reach the castle and cuddle Bertie. She needed to start making plans for the future. A future without the only man she would ever love.

Rafa rested his forehead on the window pane. His eyes ached from staring into the distance for a glimpse of the taxi and it must be why his lashes were wet. Big boys were not meant to cry. But a stupid, foolish man who hadn’t appreciated the treasure he had been gifted until he faced the gut-wrenching possibility that he might have lost his golden girl—he cried. Silent tears leaked from his eyes and burned in his chest.

He should have told Ivy that he wanted their baby, their miracle. A choked sound of agony was ripped from his throat. If Ivy had been injured, would the baby survive? He wanted to protect her from hurt and pain, and he’d wanted to protect himself, he admitted. Who wanted love when it risked tearing your emotions to shreds? He’d thought he was safe in his fortress, but love had found a way in when he hadn’t expected it and had captured his heart.

Lights appeared in the darkness outside, car headlamps that turned through the castle gates. Rafa heard his pulse thundering in his ears as he shot out of the room and took the stairs two at a time. He halted, and his gut clenched as he realised that in the dark he hadn’t seen if the car was a taxi...or a police car bringing devastating news that Ivy had been hurt in the traffic accident. He wouldn’t allow himself to think she might be dead. He could not bear to lose her.

Before Rafa reached the door, it opened and Ivy walked in. He was amazed that his legs kept him upright. She looked confused to see him.

‘Why are you here?’ she said in a defeated voice. ‘I thought you would be at the penthouse.’

Ivy wished Rafa would say something instead of staring at her as if she were a ghost. The expression on his face made her heart thump, but he always had that effect on her, she thought wearily. Somehow she would have to get over him, in a hundred years or so. She wondered if he would try and prevent her from taking Bertie away. They would have to come to an arrangement over visiting rights. Maybe he would want custody. She felt sick as she added that new worry to the long list in her head. She could not bear to be parted from Bertie.

But she couldn’t stay married to Rafa and have his baby when she would never have his love. It was destroying her, destroying the self-confidence she had found since she’d married him. Worst of all, it was destroying the sense of hope that had carried her through her cancer treatment and losing her beloved sister—the hope that she would one day find a man who loved her. She had reached the end of the fairy tale and discovered that happy-ever-after was a foolish dream after all, just as her mum had found with each of her failed marriages.

Rafa strode towards her and Ivy caught her breath at the wildness in his eyes. His skin was pulled tight over his cheekbones and his jaw was clenched. She had a sense that it was taking his immense willpower to hold himself together.

‘Where else would I be but where you are,tesoro?’ His voice was strained, as if it hurt to speak.

‘Don’t,’ she whispered. She was fooling herself to think he sounded as if he cared about her when she knew he didn’t. ‘I don’t want to be married to you any more, Rafa.’

She heard his sharply indrawn breath. ‘I know I have given you every reason to despise me,piccola.But if you would give me a chance to show you...to tell you...’

‘Tell me what?’ She did not understand why he sounded so—broken, as if the idea of her not being his wife hurt him deeply.

‘I...’ His throat worked as he swallowed hard. ‘I know it was Sandro who spoke to the journalist.’ For some reason, Ivy had had an idea that he’d been about to say something else. ‘I should have believed you, and I will spend the rest of my life trying to win your forgiveness.’

‘It doesn’t matter now.’ She’d forgotten about Gelato Man. ‘Why should you have believed me? I know your first wife deceived you.’

‘You are nothing like Tiffany.’ Rafa’s eyes blazed. ‘You wear your honesty like a badge, but I was too blinded by my prejudices and bitterness to see the beauty of your heart.’

‘Please don’t.’ Ivy could not take much more, and tears brimmed in her eyes. ‘There was an accident and people died.’

‘I was terrified that I’d lost you.’ Rafa’s voice broke and, if Ivy’s heart hadn’t already been in a million pieces, it would have shattered then. He touched her jaw, and she was startled to see his hand was unsteady. The sheen in his eyes turned them from grey to silver and she did not dare attempt to define the emotion blazing from beneath his thick lashes.

Ivy remembered the promise she had made to herself in the taxi that she would be honest about how she felt about Rafa. Everything was telling her that he felt something for her. Maybe what he felt wasn’t love, but it was no reason to withhold her love from him.

‘I thought I could marry you and not fall in love with you,’ she confessed. ‘But I was wrong. I was already in love with you on our wedding day, and I have loved you more with every day since I became your wife.’ She put up her hand to hold him off when he moved towards her. ‘I love you, but I can’t stay in this marriage.’

‘Because I don’t want the baby,’ Rafa said tautly.

Hearing him say it destroyed what was left of her composure and she dropped her face into her hands as sobs tore through her.

‘Tesoro. Ivy,amore mio.’ Rafa groaned, pulling her into his arms. ‘I want our baby more than almost anything in the world. The only thing I want more is for you to love me as much as I love you.’

She opened her mouth but no words came out. ‘You said you would never fall in love. I understand, I do. Your first wife hurt you with her lies...’ Her voice tailed off and her heart stopped when she saw that Rafa’s eyelashes were wet.

‘I love you.’ He rested his forehead against her brow. Ivy put her hands on his chest and felt the thunder of his heart beneath her fingertips. ‘I tried to deny how you made me feel, and I thought I could be happy with the friendship that grew stronger between us every day. But the truth is that you stole my heart from the beginning, and I never want it back. It’s yours,piccola, and I know you will take care of it because I trust you beyond words.’

‘Rafa...’ She was afraid to believe him.

‘I want our baby and I will love him or her,’ he said intently. ‘I already do because the baby is part of you. One day we will tell our eldest child that he is special because we chose to be his parents, and we’ll tell our second child how lucky we are to have been given a miracle.’

He captured her tears with his thumbs and gently wiped them from her cheeks. ‘Every day I will tell you how much I love you, and if I am luckier than I deserve to be then perhaps one day you’ll believe me.’

Rafa’s hands shook when he framed her face, and the tenderness in his kiss healed Ivy and made her whole, made her believe in a love so strong it would last a lifetime.

‘I love you. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t,’ she admitted softly. She smiled against his mouth when he kissed her and told her that she was his world, the love of his life. His wife. Their passion had always been electrifying, and it blazed when Rafa drew her closer and ran his hands over her body as if he was scared she might disappear.

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