Page 55 of Frozen Hearts and Death Magic

11

Decisions

Leah knew this was a dream, and yet she still felt disoriented, still felt a chill through her body. There was blood again, blood on the floor, blood on the walls of a ballroom with gold cornices on the ceiling. Not gold anymore; blood was dripping through them, turning them red. This wasn’t Frostlake, this wasn’t anywhere she knew, and the place was empty, without even corpses on the floor. And now the blood was rising, about to engulf her, drown her.

The single window was on the opposite side of the ballroom. So far. With more and more difficulty with each step, she waded through the blood until she reached it. Outside, all she saw were black clouds and a storm. No sign of her dragon. No sign of anything she knew, and yet she had to run, escape, or the blood would drown her.

Soft knocks on her door woke Leah up. Her relief in being out of that dream didn’t last long, as she soon remembered that this was also a strange reality, a reality where her castle had been attacked, where she had to make a lifetime decision in an insanely short amount of time. The knocks got louder.

She was about to ask who it was, when her mother walked in, already wearing a day dress, her face stern. “There’s a lot to do today.”

Leah sat up. “I know.” She then noticed the dark circles under her mother’s eyes and her demeanor, as if she were carrying a heavy weight. Leah added, “I know everything’s really difficult right now.”

Her mother sighed. “Everyone’s leaving after the emergency meeting. The gathering’s over.” Her voice was clipped.

Leah knew how much her mother had planned for this gathering, how much she’d been looking forward to it. The closing ball would have been amazing, with more musicians and artists. Now none of that would happen. “I’m sorry.”

“No.” Her mother shook her head. “It could have been worse.” She gave Leah a strained smile. “But you have a wonderful opportunity, and I feel that you might have good news.” There was a hint of hope in her eyes.

About what? What could Leah do that would make her mother happy? The answer came to her like a punch. Venard. Leah felt a chill in her insides. “I don’t know.”

“Leah.” her mother’s voice was slow. “There won’t be as much time for you to make up your mind. But you can strengthen Frostlake. The decision is in your hands.”

Leah sighed, and decided to say what she was thinking. “Marriage is forever. How can I choose it like that?”

Her mother took Leah’s hand in hers. “You’re still under the incorrect assumption that the secret to happiness is choosing well. It isn’t. The secret is honoring the person you chose.”

“When do I have to make a decision?” Leah felt cold inside.

“Ideally before they leave. If you’re smart, before the emergency meeting. We’ll need allies, darling.”

Memories of the previous night came to Leah. Venard wasn’t unpleasant. But then, every time she thought about him, it was as if Fel came into the thought and ruined it. It was Isofel that she wanted. Isofel, who’d told her he wanted nothing with her.

Was Leah going to sacrifice an alliance and maybe even the chance for a happy union because of some silly, pointless feelings for a prince who had turned his back to her? And again, there was nothing wrong with Venard, who was even good looking. And yet all she thought about were Isofel’s green eyes. Isofel, Isofel, Isofel, a horrible obsession that would cost her dearly. Here was her mother, wrapped in sadness, waiting for one piece of news that could cheer her up. And Leah had the power to give it to her.

Leah sighed and stared at her mother. “If I agree to marry Venard, you think it will help us?”

“A lot.” A smile illuminated her face. “You are so lucky, Leah, that you have a handsome young man interested in you, and it couldn’t be a better match.”

Young and handsome. True. A thought then hit her: unlike her father, who was much older than her mother. “How did it feel? When you chose to say yes to dad?”

She looked away briefly, then faced Leah again. “It was like the sun piercing the clouds after a devastating storm.”

Leah smiled. “It sounds romantic when you say it.”

Her mother shook her head. “Anything but romantic. Practical, realistic. Thunderstorms are romantic. A safe, dry house is practical. That’s what I need you to be: realistic, rational. Things that are worthwhile, things that matter, they aren’t romantic. Day-to-day life isn’t romantic. Kingdom treaties aren’t romantic. But it’s going to be your life, and you might as well find joy and beauty in it, in things that matter, in things that have true value.”

Her kingdom, her future, it all depended on this moment. Perhaps her father would let her say no to Venard, perhaps he wouldn’t even mind it. But that would certainly create an added strain between Frostlake and Ironhold—right when they needed allies. And what would it change for Leah? Who would marry her after that? She didn’t have much of a choice—and she was acting like a spoiled brat, dreading not having more choices, when the one she had was perfectly fine.

“I know,” Leah said. “I know romance is silly. And…” It took some strength to say the next words. “I’ll marry Venard.”

Her mother smiled. “Darling, I’m so proud of you, so happy for you.”

Leah nodded. Her heart was racing. If fast-beating hearts were a sign of love, perhaps there was something to Venard.

A hint of emotion laced her mother’s voice, as she said, “All I want is to see you happy, Leah. I want you to have everything: the love, the husband, the castle, the crown, the happy children. I want to see you happy, fulfilled.” Her smile was broad now. “And I think I will.”

“Yes.” Leah wasn’t sure of anything. She felt as if there was something rotten inside her, something festering. But that was her heart, right? And she was supposed to ignore it. Still, for now, she wanted to focus on something else. “I… I’d better get ready for the emergency meeting.”

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