Page 95 of Frozen Hearts and Death Magic

“I’ll hold you, then.” He smiled and approached her. “I’ve been wanting to, you know?”

She wasn’t sure if he was trying to be seductive. All she knew was that she felt a chill down her spine—the bad kind of chill.

“Fine.” She wanted to change the subject, quickly. “Why then am I left in this room? Without even any books?”

He tilted his head, as if confused. “For your safety. Where do you even want to go?”

What kind of stupid question was that? Still, she only said, “The library, for example.”

“Tell me which books you want and I’ll bring them to you. And you won’t be alone anymore. I’ll come every night to see you.”

“What?”

“What do you mean what? You’re not pregnant.” He pointed at her belly. “It means you’re ready to have a little ironbringer in there. What do you say?”

She swallowed, feeling cold all over. “I… Can’t we wait?”

“I know you’re afraid. But I’ll be gentle.”

No, no, no. The thought of him touching her made her want to retch, even if she hadn’t eaten much. She had to postpone, had to find a way out. “We should… get to know each other a little more, don’t you think?” She considered mentioning that they had barely kissed, but then feared he’d want to kiss her and the thought was revolting.

He stared into her eyes. There was kindness there. The problem was that he had a screwed-up version of what kindness was. “That’s the whole point, Leah. Get to know each other. Grow closer. This will help us.”

No, not tonight. Not ever, in fact. She had to find some excuse for now, some way out. “I think we should wait until… until after the wedding party.”

He paused. “Technically, we’re already married, but… that’s fair, I guess. Enjoy then your last nights alone.”

Leah was trembling when he left. She sat on the bed and took slow, deep breaths. She knew this would come one day, knew it even when she had told her mother she agreed to marry him. What had she been thinking? It was all well and good for her mother to say that friendship was enough for a marriage, but they would need to… get close. Get their clothes off and then do whatever they had to do. She recalled Cassius staring at her naked body and imagined Venard doing the same while at the same time touching her. So gross. Perhaps she would retch even while half starving.

She had to focus. Had to find a way out. These were small details that didn’t matter that much. His words that they would leave to Frostlake soon didn’t make that much sense.

If they got there, the first thing she’d want to do would be to order someone to give Venard a good flogging or something. Great, she was turning into Lady Celia. And plus, it wasn’t him that she wanted to flog.

Perhaps that was what he was counting on; that she didn’t like his family but liked him. Perhaps this was even a strategy planned by the Ironholds, to isolate her and make sure he was the only person offering her “kindness”. Perhaps they thought she’d be under his control by the time they went to Frostlake. They had to be insane. Insane, yes, sure. On second thought, it actually made a lot of sense.

So if they were thinking she and Venard were getting along well, that would be her key to going home: pretending she liked him. Oh, no. That would mean eventually doing whatever she had to do with him. She took another deep breath. She’d postpone, postpone, postpone—until she couldn’t anymore. Then she would be brave.

For now, there was one thing she wanted: to communicate with someone dead from Ironhold that could maybe tell her a secret, something. There should be at least one person who had been wronged, who could use the opportunity for revenge, who could maybe give her some information that could be useful. At first Leah wanted to try to find a way to escape this kingdom, but now that she was about to return home so soon, she wasn’t sure if trying to escape was wise. She had also realized that it would be wrong to try to reach Fel—wrong and useless.

Using her dreams to reach the dead was very different from the way her father did necromancy, but she figured her strange, weird nightmares had to be worth something.

That was how she lay down, trying to forget Venard, forget her humiliation, forget the wedding party, forget what would happen after the party, as she wasn’t going to go anywhere if her thoughts kept circling her mind.

With slow, deep breaths, she tried to reach her land of dreams—and nightmares. There had to be someone dead around that castle who would want to talk to her. There had to be.

Leah was standingon a frozen lake at night.

“Isofel!” she yelled. “Fel!” Her eyes were wet with tears. She had to find him.

A humongous wolf approached her. It wasn’t a wolf, as its hair was all mangled and strange, and it had three red, brilliant eyes.

The creature jumped on her and she trembled with the rush of fear—then woke up on her bed, sweating. Why was she trying to find Isofel? She should leave him alone, let him rest. It wasn’t as if they’d been anything special when he’d been alive. Still, his death made no sense, it hurt. She didn’t even have any idea how he’d died, but it wasn’t as if she was going to ask anyone.

But she had to bury all thoughts of him—and try to find some useful information. This was not time for reminiscing, regretting, or even mourning. Oh, Leah. Focus.

Everything was dark around Leah.Darkness, so much darkness and nothingness.

“Fel!” she yelled.

---