Page 97 of Too Tempting

“I think it’s for the best,” I reply.

He lets out a heavy breath. His wide brown eyes turn from me and he stares at my popcorn ceiling. “You didn’t hear everything I said. Not that it’s an excuse. More than anything, I’m sorry that I hurt you. You don’t know how much this has been eating away at me. Knowing that I made you cry. I fucking hated myself for it.”

I go to interject and before anything but a huff of breath leaves my lips, he stops me. “Just let me get this all out.” I nod in agreement, shutting my lips and letting him talk. “When I was talking to Dom, you heard the last part, words I can’t take back, but I didn’t mean. I don’t wish he never introduced us. Before I said those terrible things, I told him how confusing it was for me to feel jealous about someone I’m in love with and someone I’m falling in love with. The feeling has been so confusing, Kelsey. Logically, I want everyone in this pack to love each other in whatever way is comfortable for them. But I realized that jealousy was mainly directed at you and Dom. I felt like the second choice Omega.” I go to open my mouth again, but he shakes his head.

“I know that it’s not true, really, I know that. But this feeling has been riding me. Whenever I see you and Dom together or one of you with Emmett and I’m not involved, it eats me alive. Like I’m an intruder or a tag along in this pack. Shyla thinks it’s because I’m a little older and unbonded and the need to bond is really eating at me. I saw a doctor, and he believes that’s the case too. I started a low dose of suppressants to hopefully ebb this feeling. Shyla also figured out that if I was involved, that if my focus was on someone in the pack, that I was okay and it worked. But I don’t want everyone to feel like they have to walk on eggshells to be with me. I don’t want to be a burden.”

He’s lightly crying while he expresses himself. I wait a few moments to make sure that he’s done talking.

“I was really hurt, Cameron. But I forgive you. Seeing how I was during my heat and how poorly I handled what I considered rejection was hard. If you’re feeling that way and you’re not in heat, I can’t imagine. You’re not a burden and I’m falling for you, too. I’ll do whatever it takes to make this work, and it means a lot to me that you are taking the steps to take care of yourself.”

He turns, so he’s facing me again. “I want to be better. I want to be someone who makes you happy, Kelsey. Not just someone you were saddled with because you love Dom.”

I gasp and grab his face. “If you think for one second that I’m with you because you are a two for one package, you really don’t know me. I want to be with you because you’re kind, smart, endearing, and you have so much love to give. Do you know how many Omegas would have forbid Dom from pursuing me? Do you know how many wouldn’t even dare to befriend a female Omega? You really don’t give yourself enough credit, Cam. You love with your whole heart and I would be honored to be one of those people.”

“You already are.” He pulls me against his chest and we don’t speak anymore. It’s all laid out there. I forgive him and we both agree that this is a work in progress and we have a ways to go until we can officially be a pack. But the effort and the feelings are there. It’s just going to take time and work to get there.

His gentle scent lolls me back to sleep, my body needing rest after everything I’ve put it through.

I wake, this time to a cold and empty bed. My stomach sinks, but as soon as I hear a slight chatter down the hall, I exhale. They didn’t leave me alone.

Deep down I know that was a stupid thought, but right now I’m feeling quite vulnerable. I knew my conversation with Cameron would be easy, but Shyla is different.

Thinking about speaking to her makes me want to cry. I hurt her; I lied to her. She has to feel so confused. She was still there for me during my heat. How hard was that for her?

I decide to take a shower, give myself a few more moments to clear my head and collect what I’m going to say. I haven’t even spoken to Emmett about it yet. Last, he told me he was getting the silent treatment. Are they still not talking?

As quietly as possible, I turn on the shower and undress. I don’t feel as sticky as I thought I would, but I still don’t feel clean. I don’t even dare to look in the mirror to see the state of my hair. It’s probably a fucking disaster.

Pulling back the flamboyant flamingo curtain, I hold my hand out under the spray. Once the water is hotter than hell, I step into the shower, the hot water warming my muscles. I don’t even have the strength to stand as I slump to the shower floor. Wrapping my arms around my legs and letting the steam soothe me. I can’t help the few tears that escape. I’m still feeling on edge from my heat.

It’s like my nerves are still a live wire of continuous emotion. The click of the door startles me until I hear her voice. “Can I come in?” Shyla asks. I nod my head like an idiot. She can’t see me.

“Yeah,” I mumble.

“Can I get in with you?” she asks. Her voice is soft. I don’t sense any anger in her tone.

“Sure,” I reply. She’s quiet as I imagine she undresses. It feels like time is ticking by so slowly while I wait for her to open the curtain. When her hand slowly slides the curtain back and she finds me on the floor, she sighs.

“Should we turn it into a bath?” she asks. It’s a good idea and I nod my head. She pushes the mechanism to switch the water flow and closes the drain.

Before she gets in, she digs in the medicine cabinet, finding some bath salts and putting them in the tub. I sigh in relief, knowing how good that’s going to feel. After the salts are in and the water fills the tub, she slides the curtain all the way back and motions for me to slide forward.

She’s careful as she maneuvers her body behind mine, both of us quiet. I’m anxious about her reactions and how she plans to touch me. She surprises me by wrapping her legs around my sides and pulling me against her chest.

Shyla is quiet, and it breaks me as I burst out into sobs. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have lied.” She holds me tightly, like if she lets go, I’ll crumble into pieces. She might be right.

“I’m not mad about that,” she says, gently, her soft hands rubbing down my arms. My body calms and my head rests against her shoulder. At least I don’t have to look at her. It makes it easier. “I’m not mad at Emmett either,” she says for my benefit.

She sighs, taking warm water and cupping it in her palm and ladling it over my body to keep me warm. “I’m not pleased that you both kept a secret this big from me. But after my reaction, I understand where Emmett was coming from and that you were following his lead. I’m just not sure that you still want this.”

I was still in her arms, confused. “What?” I nearly ask hysterically.

“You’re not blind, Kelsey. Meera and I look a lot alike. How can you be with me and not think of her? How can you trust me after what she did to you?”

That grabs my attention, and I spin around in her arms, water sloshing all over the floor. Her eyes are wide.

“I would never compare the two of you. You would never hurt me. You’re not the same. We didn’t keep it a secret because of anything I felt. We kept it a secret to protect you.”