Page 40 of Secret Santa

“Oh my god, is Harlow pregnant?”

He could have meant Beckett since he and Lane were about to welcome their daughter Marin any day now. We all were waiting with bated breath for the call that Lane was in labor. I know everyone was at the ready to fly to San Diego to meet the next generation of Murrays.

Harlow and I however, had just had a conversation a few months ago about how they’d dropped the goalie months ago hoping to get pregnant ahead of their wedding or get a head start just in case it didn’t happen right away. They were weeks away from getting married and she’d been in tears that it hadn’t happened yet.

“That is top secret information.” He kissed me as he pressed in. “It’s really new news. They had a doctor inject Cash’s sperm directly into her ten days ago and according to the ultrasound today, all signs are pointing to another baby Murray.

“Harlow is one of my closest friends. Why do you know before me?”

“Cash needed to ask someone about our medical history. Beckett is wrapped up in worrying about Lane and the baby. Harris is—well, Harris—and he didn’t want to call my mom and fill her with false hope. So he called me.”

For long moments there were no more words. Just the feel of him pressed into me, and the breaths and sighs that punctuated our coupling. The world fell away when we like this. No matter what was happening outside of our brick three bedroom, two bath ranch, I was here with the love of my life, and it was all that mattered.

“I am so lucky soon-to-be Mrs. Murray,” he kissed down my neck, whispering in my ear.

“And why is that?”

I lifted my hips to meet his thrusts, the rhythm of our lovemaking throwing us up the summit so much faster than I’d expected.

“I could make love to you a hundred times a day, despite that, it wouldn’t be enough.” Presley panted, riding out his orgasm before collapsing next to me, his softening cock resting on my leg, his thigh pinning mine down, his calf wrapped around mine.

“Last summer, I sat in my apartment wondering if I’d made the right choice moving to Texas. It was such an enormous risk. It felt like I jumped with no parachute. I didn’t know if being here was my purpose, and if it wasn’t then I wasn’t sure what my purpose actually was. But I found you, and … Fitzy.” He said with a chagrined eye roll, “And, now I have a family that truly feels like a family, and you, my new family. The woman who has filled my life so completely I can’t imagine what it would be without you.”

In the quiet of the moment, I saw our lives stretched out before us. Our house on a quiet street in the town I grew up in, would be filled with love and laughter, filled with family bonded through birth and those made family through friendship. The magic of Christmas sprinkled its fairy dust on both of us.

* * *

And that was the story of how ahard headed woman, couldn’t help falling in love,oneblue Christmas.

Willow’s Mea Culpa

For those who have read me before, you know that I use my mea culpa to admit/acknowledge/accept all of the shit that I took serious creative license on in my book. As a reminder this is a literal last minute brain dump thrown into the back of the book just before I hit publish—so there’s probably going to be typos. No one sees this but me.

Vellum (the platform used to make these books all pretty and shit) just released an update that allowed for “text bubbles.” It’s the first time in a book I’m using them and hopefully they look decent. On my side they look pretty cool…fingers crossed they look decent across all platforms. If there are weird formatting things please let me know. I’ll go back to indicating text messages the old way I did with alignment blocks if the text bubbles don’t work or if they are harder to read.

Before I get to the mea culpas I wanted to say something first that surprised even me.It’s a Wonderful Lifeis one of my favorite movies. I took a Film As Literature class in college and did a deep dive into Capra. Prior to that class I’d already been a huge fan of the wide eyed optimism inMr. Smith Goes to Washington(Shout out to Dr. Zarab my high school junior year American History teacher for showing that movie in her class). Anyhow, Capra has always had a soft place in my heart. During the holidays it always reminds me of that movie because it would literally be on a million times a year when I was a kid (the copyright expired in 1976, so as a child of the eighties it absolutely makes sense that people were going hog wild for that film as I grew up).

If you’re reading these in order you’ll read this prior to Santa Clause which comes out in December. Sorry —that one also pays homage to Capra but in my defense we all wrote teaser chapters for those books (Rental Rendezvous was a year-long collaboration with a new book coming out each month, starting in January) … so when I wrote it I had no idea I’d be writing this book or that Capra would also play a part in this story. I just needed to write something that screamed that book would be a Christmas book and what better way to do the Holidays than have people talking about the movies that they love.

So this book with all its kismety goodness in relation to Capra… As Im writing it I’m like what can Priscilla give to Presley that would quietly say “I see you” without blatantly be so obvious that she was his Secret Santa and I thought about a book about Christmas movies because that’s fairly benign and would be something neat maybe most people would think is a cool gift from a secret Santa.

When I got to the end of this book and I wrote the grand gesture I was like what could Presley do to really spread a salve over her wounds and show her somehow that people loved her and thought of her as part of their community. I swear hand to god I never even realized I was writing my own version ofIt’s a Wonderful Lifeuntil I literally typed the line from Jesse and I was like holy shit… he reallydidtotally just George Bailey her.

Those little signs from the universe I swear I live for them—and thank you part of my brain that disconnects when I write and then surprises me with things like these that clearly my subconscious tied together long before my conscious thought caught up to it.

And, if you haven’t watchedIt’s a Wonderful Lifelately, watch it. I swear every time I watch it, depending on where I am in my life or how I’m feeling at the time, it always feels different The message feels different..the story hits different. But every time, I love it.

So, I happened to see a review somewhere that had mentioned that one of my books they’d wished they would know more about a character after the end— to have a view of them a year or two out to see what they are doing in their lives. If you are new to me, and this is the first book of mine you’ve read, first—hi, welcome.

I love romance novels. I really, truly do. I love writing worlds where people are kind, families don’t hurt one another, friends know when you need help, and people have emotional intelligence and rationally talk with one another.

The thing that has always made me a little less thrilled with some romance books is how inauthentic instalove feels sometimes (which is probably also why my instalove books tend to run a bit long, haha). If there isn’t something that makes a reader inherently know okay these people dig each other and its not just because they had sex in chapter one, me personally, I feel as if its not authentic or as close to authentic as love stories can be. Many of books are happy for now, or an HEA that you knowdown the roadwill end with marriage and possibly babies.

For a lot of years even writing babies hurt my heart too much. Now, I think that wound is finally closing up at least so it doesn’t ache every single day. It’s become a bit easier to wish the best for my characters — well some of them anyway—I hate how infertility is just kind of ignored in so many romance novels so there will always be those that have different paths if you read more than just this novel from me.

Anyhow my long winded point, my characters will always deepen and broaden in other character’s books. I love to share peeks into their lives as they come to me. And sometimes they do come by total surprise. For example when I wrote Flirt Like a Champ, I don’t even know how Harlow’s profession as a stage manager for the opera came up…it just popped in as I was typing it. And then I was like holy crap, that’s right, I just finished writing Date and Switch where Sera…in an opera signer who never found work. And, damn girl, their lives are now interconnected because Harlow won the trip to Vegas from Bear and Raven and she works for Bear and Raven and is the girlfriend of Raven’s brother.

You’ll have to see howthatplays out in Rental Clause … I’m telling you that one surprised the hell out of me and I literally can’t wait for everyone to read that scene. Shit I love Bryce Ellis to infinity.

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