Page 26 of Make Her Bleed
It's official. I've lost my mind.
"Because I see the truth in your eyes," I admit honestly. "You could easily kill me but you won't. You won't kill me because a part of you still sees the little girl you took to see the lights on Christmas Eve all those years ago."
I see the conflict in his eyes. His anger demands he cause me bodily harm but I've struck a nerve. I'm right.
"If I'm not right, prove it. Kill me. You obviously don't respect me since you raped and kidnapped me. It shouldn't be that hard. Just a flick of your wrist. After all, I'm just a slut for you to use, right? I don't mean anything."
His wrist starts to flinch back, showing the internal struggle.
He wants to hurt me but he can't. I'm reflecting his own doubts back at him. He may threaten me but I know he won't do it which makes him less scary. He might be willing to hurt me to get what he wants but he won't kill me for the same end.
"Go ahead, Kai. Do it."
It may not be much but this is a power over him I can control. This isn't a sexual power. It's a survival power. He won't kill me or let me die. That's why even though I feel his massive erection pressing against my stomach he won't rape me right now.
I was just in a horrible car accident. If I'm not at full health, something like rape could send my health down the hole and he won't let that happen.
That's why he's trying to force me to eat. He's not trying to poison me or drug me. He wants to get me healthy so he can hurt me later.
"Careful, Malakai. Your humanity is showing."
Then, he replaces the knife with his other hand and pressed me down into the bed, slipping his hips between my thighs. His hips grind against mine as his mouth presses against mine.
"Eat. Your. Fucking. Food." He demands before he pulls back, stands up, and rushes out of the room.
I hear the lock click as he leaves and I slowly sit up, my heart pounding out of my chest like the Trans-Siberian Orchestra in full tune.
It was only a few seconds where he slipped between my thighs and pressed himself against me but it was enough that I wished he lost control.
For a fraction of a second, I hoped hewouldforce himself on me. The whole exchange made me so hot and bothered, the way he looked at me, his volatile touch. The danger in that moment made me want to be fucked by him and that's a thought I never thought I'd have about one of the men who raped me. And Ifuckinghate myself for it.
CHAPTERELEVEN
KAI
She got inside my head. Aria fucking James got inside my fucking head, and now I can't get her out of there.
Once she said what she did about her being the little girl she used to be, I started seeing it. It wasn't a young woman beneath me but that little girl she used to be, looking up at me with terror in her eyes instead of the admiration that once reflected in them.
I remember the night she talked about. That little girl was so happy, her smile so big, her rosy cheeks almost matching her vibrant red hair.
It was the only holiday I ever enjoyed, and I spent it with a little girl and my friend who was sick as a dog.
That Christmas made me feel important which made it dangerous. I'm not important, and if anyone ever thinks I'm special to them, it's deadly.
Careful, Malakai. Your humanity is showing.
I don't have any fucking humanity. It all died long ago.
So why the fuck couldn't I do it? I wanted to. I wanted to kill her so bad. I wanted to slit her open and watch the blood pour out of the wound, soaking the sheets. I needed to quell the bloodlust but then, I saw the little girl in her eyes.
My little bug. My greatest triumph, my pride.
I jog out the back door of my house and rush over to the shack that's so decrepit it's unstable. The only reason I haven't bulldozed this building is for exactly this right here.
I need to destroy something. I need to snip away my fragile humanity.
Humanity is weakness.
