Page 63 of Total Ship Show

“Hey, yourself.” She smiles as I hand her a drink. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Can I join you?”

“Of course.”

I gesture to her seat. “Scoot forward a little bit.”

She looks up at me and then scoots her body forward on the lounger. I slide in behind her, leaning back on the chair and bringing her against my chest, her head nestled under my chin. It feels good to hold her.

“You okay?” I murmur next to her ear.

She takes a deep breath and exhales, delaying her answer. “Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”

I wrap a protective arm around her. “I don’t profess to know everything about you, Ade, but I think I know enough to realize you’re not your usual self today.”

She’s silent against my chest. I smooth my hand down her arm.

“What’s eating you? You want to talk about it?”

She takes a sip of her beer as if nothing is wrong, but I can literally feel her body tense in my arms. “I think it’s hitting me tonight that we only have two days left on this trip.”

“Yeah. Is that causing you stress?”

Because it’s stressing me out.

I want to tell her that I care about her. I want to tell her that I more than just like her and can see us together if it’s something she wants. I want to tell her I’ve had more fun on this trip with her than I’ve ever had with a woman. I want to tell her I want to go on one hundred more trips with her in our lifetime. I want to tell her I’ll hold her right here all night if she wants me to, just to feel her in my arms. I want to tell her so many things, and I know I’m running out of time, but I’m also waiting for the perfect moment.

“It just means I have to leave this paradise and go back to my reality, you know?”

“And what’s reality for you? What will that entail?”

Just say the word and I’ll make it work between us.

I can be the partner you need.

The partner you want.

She sighs. “Probably audition after audition. Bustin’ my ass to make it through life in hopes I catch a big break or meet the right person in the industry…or…”

She goes quiet for a moment and looks out at the water.

I kiss the side of her head. “Or?”

“Or decide that maybe this acting thing isn’t really what I want and take the leap into the world I originally wanted to explore.”

“Wildlife conservation, you mean?”

She nods. “Yeah.”

“So, what’s the downside of choosing that path?”

“Other than the fact I would be a few years behind my peers?” She shrugs. “I guess nothing. It’s always been a passion for me. Then I got this wild dream of being an A-list actress and living the high life. But the more and more I watch that world happen around me, the more I question if it’s really something I want. It’s so up and down. It’s so unpredictable, and the more of a celebrity people become, the more their lives are flipped upside down. The media, the tabloids, all of it. That part just isn’t me.”

“You don’t love the limelight? The feeling of everyone watching you?”

She shakes her head. “I think the older I get the more I realize it’s not something I crave, you know?”

“Whatdoyou crave, Adrienne?”