Page 94 of The Last Ones Standing, Part Two

“The first thing I wanted to do when we walked out of there was call my mom. It still stings like it was yesterday and not twenty-six years ago.

“I know how bad I want this, but a part of me wonders if I’m being selfish. What if I fuck our kids up? I’m a trained killer, Gio. Going to therapy isn’t an option. Look at how that worked out for Tony Soprano.”

I snort a laugh and cut her off, brushing a hand over her hair. “First, we’re not an HBO series. This is our real life. I don’t think there’s any real time limit on grieving. To be honest, you never got to grieve.

“I don’t think you should deny yourself your greatest desire because you’re still hurting for an amazing woman who would be hard to forget if you got to spend sixteen years or forty-one with her. All we can hope to do is keep her memory alive in our children.

“I know she’s proud of the woman you’ve become. I am.” I smile and lean in to kiss her lips.

She looks into my eyes and smiles. “Thanks, I needed to hear that.”

“Jace, pull over. I want to go in that stationery shop. I think we’ll all get journals.”

“Like when we were little?” Ny gasps. “I used to love that.”

My smile broadens. It was her mom’s idea. She brought the three of us notebooks to write in.

We would sit in front of the fireplace during sleepovers and hand over our journals to the person next to us to share. Read, pass, repeat. It was Beth’s way of getting Jace to open up to Ny. I think we became closer through those notebooks. It couldn’t hurt now.

“That’s a good idea,” Jace says from the driver’s seat. “And he’s absolutely right, Ny. I think you’re going to make a great mom. Your mom is smiling down on us.”

“I hope so,” she says softly.

Luckily, Jace finds a meter to park at and steps out of the SUV. I reach for Ny’s legs to pull them into my lap as I place her shoes back on her feet. Jace comes around to open the door for her. When he opens it, he stands in his caramel-colored leather peacoat that matches his dress boots perfectly. I pull a face and nod.

This was important to him. He dressed up for the occasion. I hope that’s not lost on Ny.

Jace isn’t as calm and collected as he appears today. The loose strands of hair in his face are my first indication. He keeps that man bun neat when he’s in control.

I wrap an arm around Ny’s waist and lean into her ear. “He needs you. You’re not the only one coming apart. Let him know you’re not going to back out on him,” I whisper.

She nods. “Yeah, I’m noticing,” she whispers back.

When she steps from the car, she places a hand on his chest and lifts onto her toes to whisper to him before wrapping her arms around his waist. Jace closes his eyes and nods at whatever she says as he sways her.

I place a hand on his shoulder and give it a gentle squeeze. Once inside, it doesn’t take long for me to figure out they don’t have what I’m looking for. Instead, I order custom journals for the three of us and have them shipped to the house.

Once the order is placed, I flick my wrist out to look at the time. We should get going, I need to catch Toni. It’s time I make her indebted to me. I’ll give her Alderman and she’ll hand over what I need. They have a new witness. I need that name.

“Time to go,” Jace says at my side.

I nod and place a hand on Ny’s back. We move out in unison. In this moment, I know I can take on the world.

“I love that you remember the little things Mom did for us,” Ny says as we all climb back into the SUV.

“She was a huge part of my life too.”

“Yeah, I know.”

Jace turns to hand me a business card. I look on the back to find the information I asked him for. The location of this Alderman Toni is looking for. I pocket the card and settle in my seat.

It’s time I get in the zone. I have a lot that needs to get done. Today marks the day it all officially begins. There’s no turning back now.

By the time we pull up toAnima MiasI’m fully focused. Jace and Ny move like the soldiers they are as we step out of the car. Something settles within. I have all the confidence in the world I can pull this all off.

As we stroll into the restaurant, Toni, Car, and Blake come into view. We head straight for their table. Toni looks up from her plate and smiles.

“Gio.”

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