Page 31 of Loving Lex

I narrowed my eyes and moved into his line of vision so he couldn’t blow me off. “Lex. What’s up? What am I missing here?”

Those blue eyes homed in on me with an uncharacteristic seriousness. “Maybe a little insecurity.”

My eyes went wide, looking at the most beautiful man in the world. “Insecurity? What on earth would you be insecure about?”

“I’ve laid a lot out there, Shay.” He ran a hand over his face. “A whole shit ton of truth, without much in return.” He gave me a small shrug. “To be honest, it usually goes the other way, and... I’m not sure what to do with this.”

Denial warred with my pride and I wanted to dispute his words. Argue the point that I’d given him so much—too much—too fast. But really, compared to all he’d shared with me in this short time, what had I really shared with him? That I’d been disowned by my father? That I liked rocky road ice cream and animals? That Imighthave some feelings for him too...

Yeah, I sucked. No wonder the big guy was feeling a bit vulnerable.

“I...” I blew out a breath. “I told you real is hard for me, Lex.”

“I get that—”

“No.” I cut him off with a fierce shake of my head. “I doubt that. Because byhard, I mean I—I don’t think I’ve ever actually nailed it down.” I dared to meet his eyes. “Feelings,” I clarified. “So to speak. Ever.” I was suddenly sweaty as my babbling stopped.

He studied me for several long seconds, digesting my words. “Seriously? You mean—”

“I mean, the longer I’m away from my old environment, the more I realize how fake it all was. The people. The plastic emotions. All of it.” I cursed the tears beginning to collect in my eyes. “Nothing was real. Everything and everyone is a prop in my family, and words meant nothing. I was just a trophy to my father, so I—” I dropped my head, overwhelmed as tears choked me.

He tipped my chin up with a gentle finger. “You what?”

I took a deep, shaky breath. “I was the girl who never learnedreal,” I whispered, blinking hot tears free from my lashes. “The girl who has no idea what to do with feelings like this. With how you make my heart race when I see you across a room, or how the very second you leave I can’t wait to see you again, or hear you laugh. With how you can look at me like that and make me forget how to breathe,” I added, the words barely forming sound. “Especially when it could all disappear in a second, leaving me alone again.” I was mortified by the hiccupping cry that came out with those last words, but he didn’t seem to care as he tugged me to his chest.

“Fuck, Duchess.” He kissed my head. “That’s the realest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”

I laughed through my tears and clung to him, letting his scent calm me. How had I let myself get so attached, so fast?

He hugged me tighter and rocked us back and forth for a moment. “Thank you for that.”

I nodded against his chest, and one of his hands wound into my hair. It was intimate and sweet, and I wanted to memorize every detail.

“So... what do you wanna do today?” he asked.

I glanced up, puzzled.

“What? You have plans before work?”

“Uh, no.”

His brow lifted. “Bored with me already?”

“Eh...”

He smacked my ass. “Fine. Carry on then.”

I smacked his ass in return. “What did you have in mind?”

“I don’t know, nothing too exciting. Maybe a workout. A shower. We could catch a couple episodes of something on Netflix, eat some dinner, then head to work?”

When had my life become so blissfully, sickeningly domestic?

“Sounds perfect.”

It was allpretty perfect, I’ll admit. All of it. Including the shower sex. Maybe especially the shower sex.

Lex even held my hand as we walked into Cameo, quietly letting everyone know we were together—and I let him. Perhaps a tiny, spiteful part of me enjoyed how Sundae’s eyes roved over him like he was a juicy steak as she headed our way, then dropped to our joined hands and quickly morphed from shock to slits of jealousy as she casually diverted in the other direction.

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