Page 16 of Secret Baby for Mr. Grump

SIX

MARCUS

Initially, I wasn’t too bothered by the lack of a goodbye, as well as the fact that the date had ended suddenly without any explanation.

I got the sense that she had an emergency to take care of as everything from her body language to the way she bit her nails in the car spoke of her sense of urgency.

But then again, her body language had been off the entire date. She was visibly quiet and uncomfortable, and it wasn’t just when we were in the restaurant. It was on the way to the mountain as well. That, combined with the fact that she didn’t even want me in her home after, made me wonder if there wasn’t something simpler going on here.

Perhaps she just didn’t want to date me.

Of course, back in the day, she may not have cared that I was the son of the man who defrauded half the town. But on top of that, I was also an alleged murderer. I wouldn’t blame her if she finally buckled under the pressure of all the bad press I received.

So, by the time I received her text, I couldn’t even be disappointed.

Much.

Plus, there’s the fact that she thinks you’re just a construction worker,my inner voice taunted as insecurity reared its ugly little head.

I’d taken her to the Keke’s because it was her favorite restaurant, but perhaps I should have taken her somewhere nicer. She was a woman, after all, and in my experience, women wanted to be wined and dined. Back when I just had two cents to my name, I knew several women who desired me well enough, but at the end of the day, they couldn’t see themselves settling down with a regular construction worker, so they offered only sex in secret.

It was disappointing to think that Allie was the same.

She hadn’t been when I first met her. Back then, I knew her as a sweet, bubbly girl, a welcome balm from the rest of the population who grated on my nerves.

She always had a smile for everyone onsite when she came, never treating anyone like they were less than her, no matter their education level. Hector, one of our hardest workers, barely spoke English, and Allie made an effort to learn rudimentary Spanish just so she could tell him hello every day and ask how his day was going.

I always saw his entire face brighten up whenever she came around, and it made me feel a little jealous. Not because anything was going on—he’d been happily married to his wife for thirty years—but because I selfishly wanted to keep her light to myself, to hoard it and never let anyone else have it.

But then she would come over to me with that light blush on her cheek and make the ugly feelings disappear.

The first time she’d asked me out, it had come as a complete shock.

I knew she had a crush on me, but it was bolder than I expected from her, and at that point, we’d only spoken a few times. Most of it was her asking me questions and me giving her one-worded answers. I had nothing against her personally, but I’d never really been much of a talker and especially didn’t know how to talk to a girl who was eleven years my junior.

I knew I could be a scary motherfucker sometimes, even when I tried my best to be gentle with her.

So it was surprising when she looked me right in the eyes and suggested that we maybe grab coffee sometime. Her eyes had been bright with nerves and hope, her fingers wringing in front of her, and I felt genuine regret when I shook my head and saw the light die in her eyes.

“Oh,” she said, biting her lips as her shoulders fell. “Do you mind telling me why?”

I thought about how to explain it, then decided to say it plainly. “How old are you?”

“Nineteen,” she responded.

“I’m thirty.”

She blinked at me. “And?”

I couldn’t help smiling at the dismissiveness in her tone. “That’s quite the age gap.”

“It doesn’t matter. I’m legal.”

“It does,” I told her. “You’re far too young, and you got your whole life ahead of you. I’d feel like a pedophile if I did anything with you.” Okay, maybe the pedophile part was pushing it too far, but I’d certainly have felt like one of those creeps who chased after much younger girls.

“Well, that’s a bummer,” she said, and the extremely put-out way she said it made me want to laugh.

“The most we can do is a friendship,” I told her, even though I knew it was a bad idea. I shouldn’t be around her at all. With the way she already made me feel in those few short weeks…her addictive light was dangerous to a man like me who knew only darkness.

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