Page 34 of Reckless Liar

He raised an eyebrow at me. “And? I’m not into boys,Liliana.”

I rolled my eyes at him before turning back to the dishes. “I know thatAlexander.”

“Then I don’t know what your issue is with Sherie.”

“Sherie,” I snorted derisively. “What kind of name is that?It’s Shur-Ree, not Sherry,“ I mimicked.

“That’s her name.”

“Whatever.” I pulled the plate out of the soapy water, scrubbing it with the sponge, dipped it in the water to rinse, pulled it up to scrub, and dipped it, repeat, repeat, before handing it to him.

“You know I don’t need you to approve of who I date, Ana.”

“I know that.” A pit formed in my stomach, and I scrubbed the plate harder. The pain of the scrubbing pad rubbing my skin raw centered me. “That doesn’t mean I can’t be honest with you. I don’t see it lasting with her. You would get annoyed with her way too quickly. She’d drive you crazy three dates in.”

“You never know. She could be the great love of my life.” His voice hardened as he spoke. I snorted at him, rolling my eyes.

He slammed a plate on the counter, the sound echoing in our small kitchen. I startled, my hand going to my chest. “Goddammit, Ana. You don’t get to do this to me. You can’t have me here for you all the time. We can’t keep going out the way we do, spending all our time together, eating all our meals together, shopping together. You can’t keep falling asleep in my bed anymore. You can’t kiss me back and then act like nothing happened. It’s not healthy. It’s not right. Not unless...”

I stared at the murky water in front of me. The grease from the marinara sauce formed a film, casting a pinkish hue to the soap bubbles. Slowly, I popped a bubble with my finger. I hoped Xander would go on.

The silence in the kitchen felt crushing. I turned my head slightly to glance at him, fighting to keep my face straight. “Unless...”

His arms were tight across his chest, and he glowered at me. “Don’t you dare, Ana.”

Slowly, I turned to look at him. “Don’t what?” I asked.

“You don’t get to have it both ways, Ana. You can’t keep me all to yourself. I have needs. I get lonely too.”

“And you think I’m not lonely?” I laughed darkly.

He frowned at me. “I know you’re lonely. I see how unhappy you are. Better than anyone, I know. Don’t you realize that, Ana?”

I opened my mouth, wanting to tell him it wasn’t like that, but I couldn’t spare a lie.

“But I can’t be the person to fill that loneliness you have. It’s not fair to me. I deserve better than that. Now, if I want to spend some time with a pretty girl who, yes, might be a little silly, I should be able to. I’m not your boyfriend, Ana.”

The truth sliced through me. I fought the urge to snort at him. “I know you’re not my boyfriend, Xander. But youaremy best friend.”

He softened his glare. “You are too.”

“So, I don’t understand why...”

He stopped me, his eyebrows pulling together. “Yes, you do. I know you do. Don’t act like we haven’t talked about this. Like I haven’t made myself perfectly clear.”

“What are you saying, Xander? Tell me what you’re saying,” I asked softly.

“You know what I’m saying,” he replied. “You know, it wasn’t supposed to be this way, okay? I don’t want to feel this way. I don’t want to want you the way I do. Do you have any idea how much easier my life would be if you weren’t in it? How much happier I could be? Of course not!” he spat.

I stood back, shocked. My mind whirled with his words. They stung across my chest, breaking me apart. Was that really how he felt? The night we kissed wasn’t a fluke. I knew, I always knew it. How could I pretend otherwise? “Xander... I...”

“I know what you’re going to say, Ana. And I got to tell you… I can’t hear it. Not tonight. I can’t stand here and be rejected by you again.” He scrubbed his face with his hand. “I’m tired, and I can’t keep having this conversation with you.”

Before I could respond, he turned away and walked to the living room. I heard him sit on the couch and switch the TV on. Placing both hands on each side of the sink to hold myself up, I stared straight ahead, trying to garner the strength to step forward.

Chapter fourteen

“I'm a fantastic cook.” -Xander, age twenty-five.

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